Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Online dating experts, I need your help

bigdave17

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When I was your age, I used to see decent looking dudes with women who had a some extra lbs. I didn't understand why they were dating fatties and I was single. Now I realize that my dating impediment was because I didn't give enough dudes a real chance, I disqualified them to quickly. Looking back, I wish I had put myself out more and given guys more of a chance.

You are young, throw caution to the wind and DATE everyone. You don't have to bang them, but take them out for coffee and see what they are about.

I got another mexican cutie on the line that I'm talking to. I suppose this is not too bad considering I've only been doing this for 7 days
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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sazc

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I got another mexican cutie on the line that I'm talking to. I suppose this is not too bad considering I've only been doing this for 7 days
I expect field reports
 

Spaz

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Welcome to online dating!

On my end they tend to be high school educated, single dad's, who are, financial zeros, can't drive a conversation to save their lives, and don't know what a gym is...and they all believe that are the SH1T !!

It ain't pretty online and I don't think you are built for it
Hahaha
 

mrgoodstuff

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IDK why but it feels like Dave is always setting up ridiculous reason to validate not going for it.
Let your standard drop a little and after a few hook up you will loosen up
I picked up on me might be scared of sex... So he wants her to be a virgin or close as a virgin as possible, possibly ashamed of his member.
 

mrgoodstuff

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When I was your age, I used to see decent looking dudes with women who had a some extra lbs. I didn't understand why they were dating fatties and I was single. Now I realize that my dating impediment was because I didn't give enough dudes a real chance, I disqualified them to quickly. Looking back, I wish I had put myself out more and given guys more of a chance.

You are young, throw caution to the wind and DATE everyone. You don't have to bang them, but take them out for coffee and see what they are about.
Kinda like a sniper takes a few test shots to get in the zone. A salesman might ignite after a few sells.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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devilkingx2

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is this just a NYC thing? I live 45 minutes from Chicago and the hottest I've seen online is maybe a 7.5
It's subjective though. A 10 to him could be a 7.5 to you

Or he could be a male model with a million dollars in the bank so women you'd never see message him before he can find them
 

bigdave17

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the middle eastern cutie is not heavily muslim so that's great. I'll keep messaging her

on match, I've only had 2 of my 10 messages actually read and 1 of the 2 replied back instantly so that's a great sign. I'll keep pursuing her


i seem to be having best success with middle eastern ladies and latinas, which is what i anticipated
 

devilkingx2

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you're supposed to message 100 girls ASAP then take a break, then check and see how it went
 

devilkingx2

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If shes not a prude i dont see the problem
Give it to her so good she will want to convert to christianity lol
Religious girls tend to be prudes with all sorts of rules to follow. I don't blame dave for not wanting to wait til he's married, walk around with someone covered up, avoid pork, etc.
 

bigdave17

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Religious girls tend to be prudes with all sorts of rules to follow. I don't blame dave for not wanting to wait til he's married, walk around with someone covered up, avoid pork, etc.
i asked her if she's big into muslim faith (don't want to waste my time) and she said no
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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bigdave17

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I wont say no. But IME you only need the right pictures, rather than professional pictures.

If you do go ahead with that, I would only use one professional pic in the ad anyway. Too many professional pics on a dating ad is going to look too try-hard and impersonal, IMO.

I have 3 pics of myself where I don't look like a complete retard so it's not like I have a lot of choice


I want to hire somebody with a quality camera who knows what makes a great pic and how to pose properly. I think that would make a big difference


I have 3 girls I'm messaging with now. All are pretty cute. The body is the hardest thing to find - all 3 of them are pretty avg in the body. Do you think it's a bad idea to date a girl with cute face and good body genetics and hopefully they start to enjoy working out with me and get in awesome shape? none of them are chubby, just not super fit like i like. This latest one is probably the cutest for the face but I can't tell how good the body is. That's exactly my type for the face - super cute, dark features, black hair, great smile.
 

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bigdave17

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Don't worry about that now. Just meet up with her first and see if you two hit it off.
the women with nice fit bodies on dating sites probably have absurd standards I'm sure


What ratings did you average on photofeeler?
 

bigdave17

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Amante, we're going back and forth messaging each other and she seems to really like me but she already told me she "used to love working out but stopped and gained weight". She told me she really needs to get back into it though so that's a great sign


Do I go out with somebody as a project? She fits almost everything else I want except the body, which I would imagine probably would be fixed with 5 or 6 months of working out and dieting
 

lamath

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Amante, we're going back and forth messaging each other and she seems to really like me but she already told me she "used to love working out but stopped and gained weight". She told me she really needs to get back into it though so that's a great sign


Do I go out with somebody as a project? She fits almost everything else I want except the body, which I would imagine probably would be fixed with 5 or 6 months of working out and dieting
Is that the girl on the picture?
Man a little bit of fat on a women like that often make her look better imo.


On an other subject go on a date with her and see how it goes this is not a marriage proposal.

You will see her real shape and learn to know more about her then it will be easier to come to a conclusion.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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bigdave17

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Is that the girl on the picture?
Man a little bit of fat on a women like that often make her look better imo.


On an other subject go on a date with her and see how it goes this is not a marriage proposal.

You will see her real shape and learn to know more about her then it will be easier to come to a conclusion.

she's 28
no kids or dogs
doesn't smoke and barely drinks (what i want)
college educated
seems very nice
lives by herself
great boobs
face is EXACTLY my type. Literally could not find a girl whose face is more my type than that


the 2 downsides is she lives about 45 minutes away from me and she looks like she needs to lose about 20 lbs - which I'm worried will be worse
 

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bigdave17

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92% attraction and mid 70% on the other two. But I also had some dismal pics that rated in the 60% range. Getting the right pic is going to take some practice. Read the articles they have on the sight. That will help.
You think success on dating sites is 90% about the pictures you're using?


Like I said, meet up with her first before you start diving into the future of the relationship.

One thing at a time, Dave.

That said, don't look at it like a project. Just lead by example. If you look good and work out, she's likely going to do the same in an effort to keep you, especially in the beginning.
so you don't think it's foolish to go out with somebody who seems to fit everything except the body?

if she got in shape, she would be my 10/10. I can already tell her she has ideal "hourglass bone structure" genetics
 

lamath

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she's 28
no kids or dogs
doesn't smoke and barely drinks (what i want)
college educated
seems very nice
lives by herself
great boobs
face is EXACTLY my type. Literally could not find a girl whose face is more my type than that


the 2 downsides is she lives about 45 minutes away from me and she looks like she needs to lose about 20 lbs - which I'm worried will be worse
Stop texting her and set up a date
Good looking
 

bigdave17

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90% of success? No. But it plays a very big part in the first step of just getting the conversation started. After that it's more about who you are.
it's 90% of getting a woman interested in you I mean

Once she is interested, isn't it just common sense social skills to get to know each other and set up a date? Obviously then you have to close in person (which I'm supremely confident in)

I'm struggling with just getting replies. I've only gotten replies from 3 women.

I have no quality pics. All my pics are garbage compared to how I look in real life.
 

bigdave17

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Stop texting her and set up a date
Good looking

the all black outfit in the body picture makes me fear that I'm being catfished

I've been messaging her today, do I ask for number for today or keep talking to her for a couple days?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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