How Do I Know If She's Attracted To Me?

[davidcarr]

There are numerous identical threads on this forum. Anchor Baby and Sangheilios in particular. Both were rejected three times in a row very clearly, both have blue balls, yet both believe these women are attracted to them.

There are only two simple tests:

1. she actually goes out with you. It doesn't matter who asks who out. It doesn't matter who pays (well, maybe a little). She has to actually show up at the date, time, and location you agreed to.

Important: whatever she SAYS is irrelevant, only her actions count.

2. she is willing to have sex with you or to be physically intimate with you, skin to skin. This includes kissing on the lips, french kissing, and sex.

Note: This does not include hugging, holding hands, locking arms or light grinding.

That's it. Anything else she says or does is irrelevant. All that matters is whether she spends time alone with you and is physically intimate. There are the only two "compliance tests" that matter or count or are relevant.

 

[Mike32ct]

All that matters is whether she spends time alone with you and is physically intimate. There are the only two "compliance tests" that matter or count or are relevant.

Agreed. I’m glad you have an “and” listed above.

Sometimes a chick will go on a “friendzone-date” with a guy. She’ll spend time with him, but it’s clear that she is not (and never will be) up for anything physical/intimate.

But if she spends time with the guy AND is up for something intimate, then yeah absolutely there is attraction.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Guys who get friendzoned are putting off the wrong vibe in the first place, often a mr nice guy routine. I think it is disingenuous to the point of being sleazy to pretend to be a girl's friend in order to try to get laid. And it doesn't work.

 

[Serenity]

Guys who get friendzoned are putting off the wrong vibe in the first place, often a mr nice guy routine. I think it is disingenuous to the point of being sleazy to pretend to be a girl's friend in order to try to get laid. And it doesn't work.

Absolutely! It's better in every way to make intentions very clear as early as possible. I don't necessarily mean by explicitly stating it, but in any way possible communicate what you ultimately want. Whenever clueless guys try this though they often forget patience, become too direct and ends up being either creepy or pushy.

I find that it works best to make them understand what you're after, but adapt your pace. Some don't mind going fast and some just want to move forwards a bit slower. Keeping a pace is no trouble at all if they know what you want, because they can decide whether they'd be interested or not early. They'll know they can't friendzone you and are forced to choose moving towards giving what you want or go away. If they stick around you'll know it's only a matter of time (if you keep the frame and don't go friendly or give mixed signals). If they dodge you it will happen early, saving time and a lot of confusion/drama.

The vibe a guy should be sending out is "eventually we fvck or you disappear, no platonic friendship". Sending out "hey, let's be friends" will as you say put you straight into the friendzone. It's really just dishonest, a waste of time for both and as you say will not work.

I think more men need to understand that there is not smooth transition from friends to lovers in a woman's mind, it's a clear divide with a one way rule. You may move from lover to friend, but not the other way. Once in the friendzone it's game over.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Drop bread crumbs and lead her back to your gingerbread house.

 

[Soflobro#3]

Drop bread crumbs and lead her back to your gingerbread house.

Hehe

 

[davidcarr]

Agreed. I’m glad you have an “and” listed above.

Sometimes a chick will go on a “friendzone-date” with a guy. She’ll spend time with him, but it’s clear that she is not (and never will be) up for anything physical/intimate.

But if she spends time with the guy AND is up for something intimate, then yeah absolutely there is attraction.

This is where making a move at closing is important. One has to take the necessary steps to take her to a sex location. If she is unwilling to leave with you, if she is unwilling to go to her place with you and let you in, if she is unwilling to go into your place, game over. It is time to move on. It sucks but some guys just don't get it and hang around quite literally in her orbit for a long time, even indefinitely. Years even.

Women's power is in their sexuality and they will vampire your life away teasing you if you let them.

A general rule of thumb is 3 dates. Beyond that, it is extremely difficult to get out of the friendzone.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Good advice, I like it. Helps cut through the bullshyt that women try to put you through

 

[Murk]

How to un-friend zone yourself?

 

[davidcarr]

How to un-friend zone yourself?

I've had women spontaneously re-categorize me as 'lover' as opposed to 'co-worker' or 'classmate' on business or academic trips out of town. I think being in a different city, especially far away, releases them from the inhibitions of their social networks and also gets them away from a boyfriend or husband.

Also getting fit and healthy gave me a big boost in the number of women attracted to me.

So did getting a nicer wardrobe.

A nice car can help.

It's all the standard things everyone's already aware of but most are too lazy to fix.