Girl re initiating after saying she wasn't looking to date

[sangheilios]

I've known her for about a month, approached her and we ended up hitting it off. Next time I saw her she ended up asking me out for a date, so we exchanged numbers but she ended up canceling our date and wanted to reschedule. We kept talking and she was initiating and allowing/encouraging physical contact so I made the move this time but then she didn't give me a yes or no answer. I point blank asked her if she was seeing someone and she replied by saying no but that she just wasn't looking for anything right now, which I know is a polite let down. I end up telling her that I'd be open to going out in the future and for her to let me know. Anyway, after that whenever I'd see her I'd briefly say hi but not push for full blown conversations, just to be polite but not smother her with attention.

Now, about a week later, after her telling me she wasn't looking for anything, she is approaching me and initiating conversations with me and we talk for a while. How should I play something like this? All of our interactions have been through face to face conversation and we do not text each other or interact on social media, which I don't use at all anyway.

 

[Glassguy]

Put her in the friend zone. Tell her that you arent really looking to date right now and dont want anything serious because you are too busy to commit time to a committed relationship but you guys can be friends and grab a drink and hang out sometime......as friends. Then watch her fvcking hamster spin out of her head if she is truly sexually interested in you.

If you pull this off, you can probably easily get her into a "casual" thing.......grab a drink, go smash. Wash, rinse, repeat.

If you do this correctly to a woman you will find that you couldnt beat them away with a stick after a few weeks of smashing them.

 

[R.U.G.]

She's looking for attention and someone to orbit her. I agree with @Glassguy. Follow his advice. It's weird, the less interest you show a woman, the more their interest rises; assuming it's at least @ a 5 or 6. Hence forth you give and take.

 

[AttackFormation]

Her rightful place should be as a bit of an annoyance. But she isn't in her rightful place. For some reason you are giving her some kind of priority and taking her seriously.

Rather than a quick trick that may or may not work the once, the priority is to work on being better than such a situation. Solid basic life stuff.

Having more options on the go ("spinning more plates"). Having aspirations, hobbies, more interesting things to be doing. etc

This, at first I was agreeing with Glassguy but on second thought I wouldn't bother with this girl. If it's not a yes, it's a no. Don't waste valuable mental energy on this chick. Just agree and amplify so she'll stop bothering you, "I'm so glad we agreed to just be friends".

 

[Dash Riprock]

Never take what a woman says at face value. Always watch actions.

They are almost always looking for a cool guy to date or one to trade up to if they are dating. It's in their wiring/DNA and they can't deny it. This is the case 95% of the time so the odds are with you. There are some isolated cases, 5%, where they just got out of a relationship, have health issues, etc., where they actually are not looking to date.

 

[Dash Riprock]

She's looking for attention and someone to orbit her. I agree with @Glassguy. Follow his advice. It's weird, the less interest you show a woman, the more their interest rises; assuming it's at least @ a 5 or 6. Hence forth you give and take.

Agreed. If OP plays it cool and toys with her, like a cat with a stick toy, he may land her--if he wants. But, some women are just not worth the trouble or energy or effort. I choose to pursue the ones with high IL that make it easy.

 

[R.U.G.]

Never take what a woman says at face value. Always watch actions.

They are almost always looking for a cool guy to date or one to trade up to if they are dating. It's in their wiring/DNA and they can't deny it. This is the case 95% of the time so the odds are with you. There are some isolated cases, 5%, where they just got out of a relationship, have health issues, etc., where they actually are not looking to date.

This. So true. I rarely listen to what a woman says and just judge them by their actions. Also never chase. Reach out once and let her come to you. If she doesn't chase you or at least check in, it isn't worth your time. Her loss. Women want what they cannot have, so you must appear to be in their frame, but it's not 100% given. Always make sure she has that doubt in her mind. Also, don't act any different after you fvck her. Many men do, and then sh!t goes downhill. Always appear to have options and that she's not your focus in life. She reaches out, you respond at your leisure.

Again, despite what pop media says, the high valued men are the prize, not the women.

 

[Chi Town]

Theres no way to play it, just go with the flow, continue being casual with her like you been doing, if you have already asked her out then just be cool with her,

Something may happen later down the line, it's always good to have females in your social network, wheather your fvcking them or not

 

[sangheilios]

Put her in the friend zone. Tell her that you arent really looking to date right now and dont want anything serious because you are too busy to commit time to a committed relationship but you guys can be friends and grab a drink and hang out sometime......as friends. Then watch her fvcking hamster spin out of her head if she is truly sexually interested in you.

If you pull this off, you can probably easily get her into a "casual" thing.......grab a drink, go smash. Wash, rinse, repeat.

If you do this correctly to a woman you will find that you couldnt beat them away with a stick after a few weeks of smashing them.

I've never had a woman act like this with me, where she'd ask me out, flake, continue flirting and then back off....but then re initiate again with me. I've just been keeping things casual with her and seeing what comes of it.

 

[AttackFormation]

I've never had a woman act like this with me, where she'd ask me out, flake, continue flirting and then back off....but then re initiate again with me. I've just been keeping things casual with her and seeing what comes of it.

From my experience this means you are not missing out on anything when it comes to her personality. She's probably a broken person.

 

[sangheilios]

From my experience this means you are not missing out on anything when it comes to her personality. She's probably a broken person.

It's like she has a need for my attention and will do anything to keep it around, she probably isn't even consciously doing any of this. I've had women who were taken flirt with me and enjoy my attention, but they stop after I make a move and not continue encouraging me, unless of course she was considering cheating.

 

[AttackFormation]

It's like she has a need for my attention and will do anything to keep it around, she probably isn't even consciously doing any of this. I've had women who were taken flirt with me and enjoy my attention, but they stop after I make a move and not continue encouraging me, unless of course she was considering cheating.

Women in general need attention and validation like a fish needs water: they can tax themselves to survive without it for a brief time in emergencies, but sooner or later they have to go back to swimming in it to remain alive.

 

[sangheilios]

Women in general need attention and validation like a fish needs water: they can tax themselves to survive without it for a brief time in emergencies, but sooner or later they have to go back to swimming in it to remain alive.

To some degree yes, but if they are going out of their way for it then there are other issues at play here.

 

[AttackFormation]

To some degree yes, but if they are going out of their way for it then there are other issues at play here.

I was going to add that, but on second thought I wasn't sure if I could really say her behavior was particularly special. So I cut it out. Still, something is off about that chick. Again, I would put her out of my mind - I've been in something similar to these kinds of situations although not in the gym, and in every single case, it's been a total waste of time and energy for nothing. Just a stringing along for entertainment, attention and validation.

Clear your mind of her, just tell her "I'm so glad we agreed to be just friends" the next time you see her, smile and nod when she talks to you and then move on. There won't be any sex coming out of this.

 

[sangheilios]

I was going to add that, but on second thought I wasn't sure if I could really say her behavior was particularly special. So I cut it out. Still, something is off about that chick. Again, I would put her out of my mind - I've been in something similar to these kinds of situations although not in the gym, and in every single case, it's been a total waste of time and energy for nothing. Just a stringing along for entertainment, attention and validation.

Clear your mind of her, just tell her "I'm so glad we agreed to be just friends" the next time you see her, smile and nod when she talks to you and then move on. There won't be any sex coming out of this.

Yeah, she cancelled our date a couple hours after she was the one to ask me out. She cancelled our date a couple hours later but said she wanted to do a different day, so I asked when she'd be available. Didn't hear from her or see her for a few days, which is when I get this text saying she got a new phone. I see her in person the next day and the first thing out of her mouth was an explanation as to what had happened. I felt a bit off about the whole thing but I didn't see why someone would lie about something like this for no real benefit. Then that's where it lead to me asking her out again the next day after and then this story on the OP.

The whole point is that this woman took it upon herself to initiate all of this, asking me out and everything. This isn't like I asked her out, she said she had a boyfriend or clearly wasn't interested, and then continued to pursue without her encouraging any interactions.

 

[davidcarr]

I've known her for about a month, approached her and we ended up hitting it off. Next time I saw her she ended up asking me out for a date, so we exchanged numbers but she ended up canceling our date and wanted to reschedule. We kept talking and she was initiating and allowing/encouraging physical contact so I made the move this time but then she didn't give me a yes or no answer. I point blank asked her if she was seeing someone and she replied by saying no but that she just wasn't looking for anything right now, which I know is a polite let down. I end up telling her that I'd be open to going out in the future and for her to let me know. Anyway, after that whenever I'd see her I'd briefly say hi but not push for full blown conversations, just to be polite but not smother her with attention.

Now, about a week later, after her telling me she wasn't looking for anything, she is approaching me and initiating conversations with me and we talk for a while. How should I play something like this? All of our interactions have been through face to face conversation and we do not text each other or interact on social media, which I don't use at all anyway.

This thread sounds almost identical to anchor baby's. A girl (politely) rejected him three times but he still insists she was wildly attracted to him, but work, a boyfriend and maybe extraterrestrials prevented her from going out with him.

You're in the same position: she has rejected you three times, yet still flirts with you. The bottom line is, she will not go out with you. This is a very clear indication it is time for you to move on.

When women are interested in me, they ask me out. They also have a particulate date, time and event in mind. They purchase tickets. Everything is set. Plus, they actually show. Sometimes several women will ask me out.

There may or may not be any intense physical escalation during the date itself. However, when it's time to leave the event, she is very clear about whether she wants to progress. This includes: accepting a ride home. Allowing me to come inside (on whatever pretense). Allowing or initiating physical and sexual escalation when we are alone.

I've seen other guys get blueballs so often with girls who flirt with them it's almost become standard operating procedure. Be careful.

Protect your time and move on.

 

[sangheilios]

This thread sounds almost identical to anchor baby's. A girl (politely) rejected him three times but he still insists she was wildly attracted to him, but work, a boyfriend and maybe extraterrestrials prevented her from going out with him.

You're in the same position: she has rejected you three times, yet still flirts with you. The bottom line is, she will not go out with you. This is a very clear indication it is time for you to move on.

When women are interested in me, they ask me out. They also have a particulate date, time and event in mind. They purchase tickets. Everything is set. Plus, they actually show. Sometimes several women will ask me out.

There may or may not be any intense physical escalation during the date itself. However, when it's time to leave the event, she is very clear about whether she wants to progress. This includes: accepting a ride home. Allowing me to come inside (on whatever pretense). Allowing or initiating physical and sexual escalation when we are alone.

I've seen other guys get blueballs so often with girls who flirt with them it's almost become standard operating procedure. Be careful.

Protect your time and move on.

She was the one to ask me out in the first place, she actually came over to talk to me and initiated the date idea, though flaked later on. I asked her out the second time, she rejects me. However, she then starts approaching me again and pushing for full blown conversations.

As other posters have mentioned, it appears that this is a case of attention whoring but I'd like to think that a woman would have enough sense to not re initiate with someone who very early on expressed interest in her. It would be one thing if we had been friends for a while before either one of us made a move, but that isn't the case.

I'm sure you can see why this was a bit confusing.

 

[davidcarr]

She was the one to ask me out in the first place, she actually came over to talk to me and initiated the date idea, though flaked later on. I asked her out the second time, she rejects me. However, she then starts approaching me again and pushing for full blown conversations.

As other posters have mentioned, it appears that this is a case of attention whoring but I'd like to think that a woman would have enough sense to not re initiate with someone who very early on expressed interest in her. It would be one thing if we had been friends for a while before either one of us made a move, but that isn't the case.

I'm sure you can see why this was a bit confusing.

Check out my recent thread. It's concise and very easy to understand:

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/how-do-i-know-if-shes-attracted-to-me.253441/


I've seen countless girls I've gone out with give other guys blueballs. These guys constantly mistake talk for action and as a result become frustrated, angry, and vindictive. More importantly, they keep making the same mistakes over and over again.

 

[sangheilios]

Check out my recent thread. It's concise and very easy to understand:

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/how-do-i-know-if-shes-attracted-to-me.253441/


I've seen countless girls I've gone out with give other guys blueballs. These guys constantly mistake talk for action and as a result become frustrated, angry, and vindictive. More importantly, they keep making the same mistakes over and over again.

I think you are forgetting the fact that this girl went out of her way to ask me out, despite flaking later. She continued to flirt, made an opening for me to ask her out, turned me down. She then took it upon herself to go out of her way to initiate conversations with me and approach me lol.

This isn't some she smiled at me once scenario and I'm not the one causing any of this.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I've known her for about a month, approached her and we ended up hitting it off. Next time I saw her she ended up asking me out for a date, so we exchanged numbers but she ended up canceling our date and wanted to reschedule. We kept talking and she was initiating and allowing/encouraging physical contact so I made the move this time but then she didn't give me a yes or no answer. I point blank asked her if she was seeing someone and she replied by saying no but that she just wasn't looking for anything right now, which I know is a polite let down. I end up telling her that I'd be open to going out in the future and for her to let me know. Anyway, after that whenever I'd see her I'd briefly say hi but not push for full blown conversations, just to be polite but not smother her with attention.

Now, about a week later, after her telling me she wasn't looking for anything, she is approaching me and initiating conversations with me and we talk for a while. How should I play something like this? All of our interactions have been through face to face conversation and we do not text each other or interact on social media, which I don't use at all anyway.

Women are disgusting and only ghost and do a 180 when getting chucked. She jumped off the ****kkk, playboy stopped calling, and she lookin for fallback even before finishing her cream pie.


She's side piece. Practice. If on a dry spell, light it up, and then broom her. She's spoiled goods at best.