Dealing with suspected cheating

[marvinlfloresq]

Think before you act.

 

[Spaz]

Not gonna lie i don't believe in this idea that your gut is a detective either, my instincts are fvcked and lead me astray all the time. My gut reactions lead me into trouble all the time.

Generally, the more time i think and analyze, the better my decisions become

Instincts r those experiences you've accumulated over time.

The more "data" you have then more "instinctive" you'll become.

As such, the more you fvck, the more "instinctive" you become when it comes to women.

Edit: In OP's case, if he's been with her for more than a year, he has subconsciously accumulated millions of "data" of her behavioural patterns, small changes will not kick in your "spidey" senses but an accumulation will.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

I already know that you're only fvck a maximum of maybe 2 to 3 women in ur entire existence. And this is me being generous.

And all of them dumped you.

I'd also profile you as one of those boys who continually orbits women in the hope she's going to take some interest in you.

There's no point lying.

Is this your "Spider Sense" tingling lol. Its all good bro. I'll buy you a beer if I could. We are all here to help, I would hope. Thats why I am here. Peace.

 

[Ranger]

thank you.

Finally, someone with common sense. Not this "spider man instinct" stuff.

Proven documented science. But I believe in letting a man decide his own fate. No matter how much he is willing to destroy himself. A man who doesn’t trust himself is no leader. Is no man who is willing to risk all to achieve his dreams.
He’s not even willing to try or look at something outside his limited view.
“Let them that’s gonna die out, die out. The rest will feast.”
Anonymous

 

[marvinlfloresq]

Proven documented science. But I believe in letting a man decide his own fate. No matter how much he is willing to destroy himself. A man who doesn’t trust himself is no leader. Is no man who is willing to risk all to achieve his dreams.
He’s not even willing to try or look at something outside his limited view.
“Let them that’s gonna die out, die out. The rest will feast.”
Anonymous

Ranger, would this man be you? I dont understand whos the quote for? I know its not me.

You think I would jeopardise my assets, jeopardize the well being of my children, over
A "I think" mentality? Are you serious? Enough with this spider man nonesense.

The more you know, the better your decisions are.

 

[btownbuck2012]

My question is - How do you handle dealing with wife who you think cheated, but you have no conclusive proof?

if youre already thinking this way then it’s probably already happened.

 

[Ranger]

You think I would jeopardise my assets, jeopardize the well being of my children, over
A "I think" mentality? Are you serious? Enough with this spider man nonesense.

The more you know, the better your decisions are.

I completely understand your reasoning. This is faulty thinking in the world of women.
In order to make a good decision one would need enough information to actually make an assessment. Yeah I probably picked the wrong post for that reply.

There are men all over this forum who wished they had followed their instincts.
No one said dump your wife. Lol. I didn’t. I said trust your instincts. In fact I would advise against it. I didn’t realize that “Trust your instincts” meant kick your wife to the curb. That is so binary thinking. Why would you jump all the way to the wide extreme? That’s not being a Rational Male. That’s like something a woman would say. No offense intended but it really is rather feminine.

Trust your instincts means become a better man and protect yourself. You will NEVER have evidence. The getting her drunk idea is rather stupid. Women are never that stupid. So first off, you won’t know when she’s going if she does. It will be a blind side. She may even change up her approach so you are calmed down again when she springs it, if she’s going to.
She already has your assets. Thinking she doesn’t isn’t being a Rational Male.
“There is no upside to marriage.” Rollo Tomassi

In my opinion...she belongs under competition. She should have to compete now. She finally took her man as a lesser man. Without competition anxiety there is no solution. That doesn’t mean cheat. That means that she should know that she can and will be replaced at the drop of a hat.

But what do I know. I only have four children and two houses I built with my own hands. Yep. Don’t know Jack. Never been through any of that. (Eye roll)

 

[Spaz]

Trust your instincts means become a better man and protect yourself. You will NEVER have evidence. The getting her drunk idea is rather stupid. Women are never that stupid.

You expect this guy to believe what you've written ? He doesn't have much of any instincts due to lack of real life experiences and have to be dependent on Google-ing "something stronger then wine" to counter ur assertion LOL

 

[Ranger]

You expect this guy to believe what you've written ? He doesn't have much of any instincts due to lack of real life experiences and have to be dependent on Google-ing "something stronger then wine" to counter ur assertion LOL

View attachment 1734

LMAO. That’s funny.
You’re right of course Spaz.

 

[Ranger]

“So a man doesn’t know when a woman no longer loves him?” Female poster on SS
“No. He doesn’t.” Rollo Tomassi

 

[highSpeed]

You are funny. He asked how to handle a wife who he "thinks" cheated.

No its not a hallmark card. I lived this situation. Had to get counseling and survived. He's married, not in high school. "They have to talk about it", they may have assets.

He's not even sure what happen, so, read the severity of his delema. Sure, run away, and then what, repeat the same mistake? Women who have interest dont cheat. Besides, you think its that easy to just leave her? She's his wife for christ sake. Omg you kids these days....

Yo, read and understand before you voice an opinion, what would happen if nothing has happen and he starts a fire?

Op needs to be sure before taking action. Then he can chose to leave or work it out. Grow up already, this is serious ****.

If counseling "worked" for you, that's great. No matter how you slice it, that's extremely emasculating, bottom line. If you can take being emasculated from your own "wife" and continue down the road with her, good for you. I don't see many self respecting men taking being cucked from their own wives. You can get counseling for that but honestly, unless he's f*cking chicks left, right and center or beating the crap out of her, there's not much reason for her to be out f*cking other guys. It takes both sides to make a marriage work, can't simply shift to blaming him because she cheated, that's dumb.

Assets, yep, that's a reason to stay together while your "wife" is gulping down some other guy's c*ck. Good advice. Repeat the mistake? Good god no man, that's when you stay single and have fun instead of living in an artificial hell created for you by someone you are supposed to be able to trust. I've lived through cheating and no, not interested in trying to "fix" something like that.

To be clear, you have to have verifiable proof before you start accusing but if he does get it, time to move on. She forgot to pick up the dry cleaning? Fixable. She forgot to pick up milk after work? Fixable. She tells you on a bad day to go f*ck yourself? Fixable, as long as it not a frequent type of thing. She rides some other guy's c*ck? Dude, not fixable, no matter how much you'd like to advise him to do so, although I'm not sure why.

 

[Ranger]

Thinking back. There is a point in a relationship where you look into her face and see a particular look. An expression maybe.
A marriage can possibly recover from a lot of different inconsequential things.
But nothing will replace the true desire you both felt.

I am no longer of the idea or thinking that a woman’s “cheating” isn’t his fault. Hear me out. Being angry at women or swimming around in pain
Is from still thinking that it’s the woman’s nature that we have to overcome or work around.
It’s not. Yes. It’s your fault she’s cheating.
As long as a man thinks it’s her fault. In any way. He clings to some beta parts inside him. He keeps one foot in the old thinking. That maybe this thread of an idea or that one, still holds truth.

When I finally accepted that I made her that way. I could see the truth that was right in front of me. We, being born into this crazy place, fell into a $hit storm. We knew something was definitely wrong.
All of these things that people see as truth in relationships are forced upon us.
Despite the fact that it didn’t feel right or those first few dates where we saw how nothing matched what the world thinks is truth about relationships, that was the point we missed. You have to go into agreement with the lie in order for you to perpetuate the lie.
So yes it’s his fault. It’s all his fault. Not because he is a bad person or something else. He made a choice at some point, to follow the feminine imperative. Everything that has happened from that point on he needs to own up.

How to tell when a woman no longer loves you: Think back to that point where you looked up into her face and you saw “resentment”.. that was the point. She resents you for not being who you promised to be. Even though she acts independently to undermine it due to her biological reasons that in most cases, she doesn’t even know exists. It was still your responsibility to be that man.
That would be accepting responsibility. Until you do that, you have one foot in hell. The place where slaves are made.

Women will always make everything man’s fault. You won’t change that. But she has absolutely no clue why she thinks it’s your fault. She is just spouting a mantra the socialist agenda gave her.

A woman’s frame will never be “right” when it comes to sex or relationships. To give into even one little thing she throws out there as truth, is to put your foot into a bear trap.

 

[Spaz]

Thinking back. There is a point in a relationship where you look into her face and see a particular look. An expression maybe.
A marriage can possibly recover from a lot of different inconsequential things.
But nothing will replace the true desire you both felt.

I am no longer of the idea or thinking that a woman’s “cheating” isn’t his fault. Hear me out. Being angry at women or swimming around in pain
Is from still thinking that it’s the woman’s nature that we have to overcome or work around.
It’s not. Yes. It’s your fault she’s cheating.
As long as a man thinks it’s her fault. In any way. He clings to some beta parts inside him. He keeps one foot in the old thinking. That maybe this thread of an idea or that one, still holds truth.

When I finally accepted that I made her that way. I could see the truth that was right in front of me. We, being born into this crazy place, fell into a $hit storm. We knew something was definitely wrong.
All of these things that people see as truth in relationships are forced upon us.
Despite the fact that it didn’t feel right or those first few dates where we saw how nothing matched what the world thinks is truth about relationships, that was the point we missed. You have to go into agreement with the lie in order for you to perpetuate the lie.
So yes it’s his fault. It’s all his fault. Not because he is a bad person or something else. He made a choice at some point, to follow the feminine imperative. Everything that has happened from that point on he needs to own up.

How to tell when a woman no longer loves you: Think back to that point where you looked up into her face and you saw “resentment”.. that was the point. She resents you for not being who you promised to be. Even though she acts independently to undermine it due to her biological reasons that in most cases, she doesn’t even know exists. It was still your responsibility to be that man.
That would be accepting responsibility. Until you do that, you have one foot in hell. The place where slaves are made.

Women will always make everything man’s fault. You won’t change that. But she has absolutely no clue why she thinks it’s your fault. She is just spouting a mantra the socialist agenda gave her.

A woman’s frame will never be “right” when it comes to sex or relationships. To give into even one little thing she throws out there as truth, is to put your foot into a bear trap.

I absolutely believe in this frame.

In terms of masculine leadership then yes a man must be absolutely responsible for failure in his relationship with women.

The true power in a relationship actually lies with the man.

The root cause of many relationship failures is because men gave up that power or never fully assumed his leadership mettle.

However, once cheating has occurred, a man's only viable option is to cut loose and better himself for the next.

 

[Ranger]

I absolutely believe in this frame.

In terms of masculine leadership then yes a man must be absolutely responsible for failure in his relationship with women.

The true power in a relationship actually lies with the man.

The root cause of many relationship failures is because men gave up that power or never fully assumed his leadership mettle.

However, once cheating has occurred, a man's only viable option is to cut loose and better himself for the next.

In my estimation, if a man tried to modify any of this to encompass any of the feminine frame he will fail.

 

[Spaz]

In my estimation, if a man tried to modify any of this to encompass any of the feminine frame he will fail.

100% certainty.

The only way to circumvent this is to have an EQ that's higher then a woman's.

This is where age plays a factor.

If she is close to you in age then she will have an higher EQ as opposed to you.

Slowly but surely she will lose respect in the end and that's when things start to fail all around.

 

[Ranger]

100% certainty.

The only way to circumvent this is to have an EQ that's higher then a woman's.

This is where age plays a factor.

If she is close to you in age then she will have an higher EQ as opposed to you.

Slowly but surely she will lose respect in the end and that's when things start to fail all around.

Oh that’s golden. Fitting another puzzle piece.

 

[princelydeeds]

thank you.

Finally, someone with common sense. Not this "spider man instinct" stuff.

It kind of depends on the person.
Some people are downright terrible at reading people, they are trusting, see the glass as half full and/or they have a huge ego that can't even conceive of a woman cheating.

Ego can be the biggest blinder. One of my coworkers used to brag about how large his **** was and how amazing he was in bed. His GF cheated with an Asian dude with a small **** because he had a ton of $$$$ and spent it on her. My coworker didn't see it coming because his ego wouldn't allow it even though the GF started wearing clothes/shoes/purses neither of them could afford and she stayed out all night numerous times.

Personally, I'm a salesman, I'm cynical, i don't trust anyone, I have zero faith in my fellow man and even less faith in women. I notice everything with people, I read body language, I remember everything that people tell me and I constantly compare what people tell me over time.

I say all of that to say, I'm not oblivious to what women do, their lies their bull**** or any changes in habits. When a woman changes anything in her routine or even basic things about herself (like her hair, clothing, new groups/interests) something is usually up or a guy has to be aware that things might be about to change. Its often the little things that males tend to overlook, when the little things change, big **** is usually about to change. Its not really a "magical, Spidey sense" it's simply a matter of being aware and paying attention.

 

[samspade]

I'll say what I always do: If she's not behaving like a girlfriend should, it doesn't matter if she's cheating or not. She's not worth my time. Because a woman invested in you wouldn't leave a shadow of a doubt about her actions. And even if she's not getting boned, if she doesn't care enough to shape up, like I said, not worth it. You don't need to play detective, it will only make things worse.

 

[Soflobro#3]

Times i've been cheated on, it was fairly obvious when paying attention, and i was always right.

Hence, i would suggest that you are probably correct in your own assumption, and i won't question it.

I'm talking physically having cheated - not emotional cheating. That is a massive can of worms, and a shocking subject tbh.

Regarding what to do? You should never say anything. It gets you completely nowhere - though that ship has sailed. If she's cheated, then she has given you absolutely no choice but to get rid of her, regardless of your history or anything else.

Hell, they basically resent you if you don't dump them at that point.

Last situation i seen of this in my circle was a guy we knew his mrs was cheating for a long time, but nobody wanted to burst his very delusional bubble. Eventually this girl told him. He lost his mind, hit the girl in the face (i'm not joking), then went and cried and begged to his wife not to leave him. She stayed, but she despised him for it. 6 months later left for another guy.

Women aren't men, and they can't respect you anymore after something like that. Even if you did it from some better part of yourself, the result is the same. When you are in such a sh1t position, dealing with someone who is basically fvcked in the head, the only winning move is not to play.

this is why it's different when women cheat than when women do

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

My question is - How do you handle dealing with wife who you think cheated, but you have no conclusive proof?

I made the mistake of confronting her without definitive proof.....I began reading tomassi & kay too late to know stfu.

I've been on the self improvement program, lifting, eating better, reading everything I can find on married red pill sidebar.

I'm running the MAP, improving myself to the point where I'll be fine or better off if this marriage ends, by mine/hers/mutual decision.

In the mean time - it is gut wrenching, and while I accept and believe in the red pill, after being blue pill my entire life - I'm unplugging and it hurts.

Advice wanted

What happened to the OP of this thread? No response from him yet.

-Augustus-