"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

She makes plans but denies mine

JonnyD123

Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2014
Messages
178
Reaction score
82
Age
39
Not really sure if this is an issue or not, but not typical of girls I’ve dated.

In the past I always wait for the girl to initiate contact, in which case I set up a date and time for us to meet up. This girl however will initiate contact, but deny my plans. She will then come up with her own plans that involve us both. Like I said, not really sure if this is an issue, because we’re still hooking up and having sex, but just kind of something weird I picked up on.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

oldmanofthesea

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2018
Messages
1,573
Reaction score
3,272
Age
50
Sounds pretty dominant to me. As long as you are having fun and hooking up, I don't see the problem. But to me it would disqualify her from becoming anything more - she sounds like she'd want to wear the pants in any relationship and be very inflexible. Either that or she's using a "system".
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,337
Reaction score
6,878
Nothing weird, girls do it all the time. In the long run you'll both end up arguing, even where to have dinner.

It's your frame that needs improving.

In the future, when she suggests plans contary to yours, simply agree to do that the next time you've out and then inform her you've sticking to your plans.

Example; you wanted to have dinner at KFC and she wants MCDONALD'S. Agree with her and say it's a good idea for next time because tonight you want KFC.

You maintain your frame whilst not offending her at the same time. She'll respect you for that.
 

Mazer

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 5, 2017
Messages
801
Reaction score
890
Age
48
Low interest my friend, two chicks this year tried to change the venue on me, I told them no and they both ghosted me. Its more about the "place" to her than the company. A girl with high interest will go any place of your choosing. She wouldnt want to risk pissing you off.
 

Dash Riprock

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 16, 2005
Messages
1,848
Reaction score
3,698
Location
Mile High City, USA
Not really sure if this is an issue or not, but not typical of girls I’ve dated.

In the past I always wait for the girl to initiate contact, in which case I set up a date and time for us to meet up. This girl however will initiate contact, but deny my plans. She will then come up with her own plans that involve us both. Like I said, not really sure if this is an issue, because we’re still hooking up and having sex, but just kind of something weird I picked up on.
This is what you get when you act passive and wait for her to contact you.

Here's a novel thought: be assertive and call her (not text) and ask her out. Make the plan like a man and you won't have this problem. Tell her what when where and how, like a confident male should.

I can't believe I have to even say this.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,586
Reaction score
11,948
Location
DFW, TX
Sounds pretty dominant to me. As long as you are having fun and hooking up, I don't see the problem. But to me it would disqualify her from becoming anything more - she sounds like she'd want to wear the pants in any relationship and be very inflexible. Either that or she's using a "system".
A "system" ensure things on her terms and territory.
 

Masculinity

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2009
Messages
1,906
Reaction score
547
Not really sure if this is an issue or not, but not typical of girls I’ve dated.

In the past I always wait for the girl to initiate contact, in which case I set up a date and time for us to meet up. This girl however will initiate contact, but deny my plans. She will then come up with her own plans that involve us both. Like I said, not really sure if this is an issue, because we’re still hooking up and having sex, but just kind of something weird I picked up on.
Bang her while it's your turn, man.
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,762
Reaction score
7,975
Location
USA, Louisiana
Sounds pretty dominant to me. As long as you are having fun and hooking up, I don't see the problem. But to me it would disqualify her from becoming anything more - she sounds like she'd want to wear the pants in any relationship and be very inflexible. Either that or she's using a "system".
Yea as long as what she is planning is something you want to do I don't see a problem. However, the minute she starts trying to get you to go cat lady tea parties or some such BS... then you need to just back off and let her do those things alone... then you go do stuff you like.
 
Top