I went downhill

[Gan]

Ever since I found out a girl was interested in me in September and I made her one of my top priorities over everything else in my life and has now stopped talking to me about two months later because I was constantly messaging her:

-Hardly work out anymore, I went from 5.4% body fat at 6 ft 165 lbs to 20.5% body fat, same weight. Lost muscle mass and gained fat.

-I drink about 2 bottles of water a day now when I used to drink about 5.

-Been constantly high for the past month since we’ve stopped talking (was in a bad state of mind). I’ve been smoking for a year and a half nearly every day for a fraction of the day, but now I’m high every chance I get.

-Being high for the most part of my days has made me irresponsible with school and selfish. I’ve missed a few assignments and a test because I didn’t even look at what was due and when. I don’t think about anybody else but myself. Would rather stay in my room all day than interact with my family.


I’m working on getting back on track. I made the huge mistake of being too available and making her my main focus. You live and learn right?

 

[PokerStar]

what is life without ups and downs.

as long as you can learn from the experience and promise yourself to never go back to this state of mind.

we've all been there to some degree.

 

[Murk]

Don’t smokin weed, now. It’s not compatible with success, I know from experience I used to smoke daily and have not smoked for 4 years now.

 

[TheGambino]

Ever since I found out a girl was interested in me in September and I made her one of my top priorities over everything else in my life and has now stopped talking to me about two months later because I was constantly messaging her:

-Hardly work out anymore, I went from 5.4% body fat at 6 ft 165 lbs to 20.5% body fat, same weight. Lost muscle mass and gained fat.

-I drink about 2 bottles of water a day now when I used to drink about 5.

-Been constantly high for the past month since we’ve stopped talking (was in a bad state of mind). I’ve been smoking for a year and a half nearly every day for a fraction of the day, but now I’m high every chance I get.

-Being high for the most part of my days has made me irresponsible with school and selfish. I’ve missed a few assignments and a test because I didn’t even look at what was due and when. I don’t think about anybody else but myself. Would rather stay in my room all day than interact with my family.


I’m working on getting back on track. I made the huge mistake of being too available and making her my main focus. You live and learn right?

Another case of: never rely on a woman to make You happy, dont feel ashamed we All been there too Some kind of degree

 

[btownbuck2012]

Were you in an actual relationship with her? Did you have sex with her?

I'd be more worried about how severely this affected you. If it was only a couple of months and it hit you that hard, you may need to start thinking about why that was the case. Maybe hit up a therapist and have a few sessions to talk about it.

Life and relationships can and probably will hit you with much hard blowers later in life and you don't want to completely derail because of them. Figure out why you took this so hard.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

What did you use to measure your bf%? And what’s your weight right now? It seems unlikely that anyone could shift that much in that short amount of time. You just gotta wake up.

 

[lizardking82]

Do not go against this grain. This is a down period your life. Hang in there, do not try hard to make it better. Just "survive" for now and then explode when you are on the rise. Everything in life is composed of ups and downs. Just like you enjoy the highs, learn to suffer properly in the lows, they are what makes you and what makes possible the highs if you handle it right.

 

[Gan]

Were you in an actual relationship with her? Did you have sex with her?

I'd be more worried about how severely this affected you. If it was only a couple of months and it hit you that hard, you may need to start thinking about why that was the case. Maybe hit up a therapist and have a few sessions to talk about it.

Life and relationships can and probably will hit you with much hard blowers later in life and you don't want to completely derail because of them. Figure out why you took this so hard.

No we weren't exclusive, we were taking it day by day. It hit me this hard because there was no closure (although I know for a fact it's because I annoyed her lol), she just stopped replying. She was my first kiss and I lost my virginity to her, so I got really attached.

And I'm good, I don't feel like I need a therapist. I probably did early on but I'm recovering.

What did you use to measure your bf%? And what’s your weight right now? It seems unlikely that anyone could shift that much in that short amount of time. You just gotta wake up.

A weight scale, it gives you a rough estimate. I'm 165 lbs 6 ft. I love fitness, I was at 5.4% body fat a while back because I did weights, was in boxing (only punching bag routines), and did a lot of cardio all in the same day for about 5 days a week. I also kept all my meals in check. I went hard man, I felt amazing and there were no signs of over training. I'm at 20.5% body fat now because I stopped doing all of that. I probably went to the gym like 5 times in November because my motivation is gone. I started eating whatever the hell I wanted too, so yea.

 

[Gan]

Don’t smokin weed, now. It’s not compatible with success, I know from experience I used to smoke daily and have not smoked for 4 years now.

Where were you then and where are you now? I'm quitting soon because I have a job I need to sober up for in 6 months. But before I made this decision, I really couldn't picture my life without bud lol. It's something I would do to de-stress right after a long day at work or school, it was just a good way to end the day honestly. Nothing hardcore.

Get rid of this chyt. Its the devils mind fck poison so to speak. Depression and anxiety will be your best buddies

Weed kept me from thinking about her. It's why I've been smoking so much recently, at the cost of grades and my well being. I'm quitting soon, I just have a few days worth left of bud which I will be using scarcely. Besides from a job opportunity I need to sober up for, I don't need it to get through my day anymore. I feel better than I did a week ago.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

No we weren't exclusive, we were taking it day by day. It hit me this hard because there was no closure (although I know for a fact it's because I annoyed her lol), she just stopped replying. She was my first kiss and I lost my virginity to her, so I got really attached.

And I'm good, I don't feel like I need a therapist. I probably did early on but I'm recovering.

A weight scale, it gives you a rough estimate. I'm 165 lbs 6 ft. I love fitness, I was at 5.4% body fat a while back because I did weights, was in boxing (only punching bag routines), and did a lot of cardio all in the same day for about 5 days a week. I also kept all my meals in check. I went hard man, I felt amazing and there were no signs of over training. I'm at 20.5% body fat now because I stopped doing all of that. I probably went to the gym like 5 times in November because my motivation is gone. I started eating whatever the hell I wanted too, so yea.

Those are probably the least accurate ones there are. Take your bf% again and then drink a few cups of water, then it’ll say that you got skinnier in those few seconds lol. If you got naturally callused feet like mine, then you’ll get the opposite results. I don’t think anyone can go up 15% that fast tbh unless they’re Olympic level and suddenly stop everything to become a couch potato. You can get back to it anyway though. 2 months isn’t enough for anything too major, especially for intermediate athletes.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Weed kept me from thinking about her.

With respect, the smoking is probably your main issue at the moment. And I'd hazard a guess that the smoking is what pushed her away, or at least came between you. It's very easy in situations like this for us to say it's the woman who is at fault; nine times out of 10 it's probably 6 of one half a dozen of the other. If you went from 5 to 20% fat, we can't really be too surprised she lost interest; her former fitness model is now a couch potato. I've had the same issue in the past with smoking and drinking.

If you've smoked every day for 18 months, you're not in a fully fit state of mind for almost any interaction, let alone maintaining interest of a female. You seem to understand this though, which is a start.

You've gotta want to change. If you do want to, you just need to plan some goals and stick to them. You know the score.

 

[Gan]

UPDATE: props to my buddy for telling me yesterday that she messaged him "by accident" (according to her) the night before (and showing me the messages). I have no idea why she did or what she expected out of messaging him, she knows he's one of my best buds. This girl is a hoe and I'm p*ssed off for falling for her, I honestly want to tell her sh*t if she messages him again.

What do you guys suggest I do?

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

UPDATE: props to my buddy for telling me yesterday that she messaged him "by accident" (according to her) the night before (and showing me the messages). I have no idea why she did or what she expected out of messaging him, she knows he's one of my best buds. This girl is a hoe and I'm p*ssed off for falling for her, I honestly want to tell her sh*t if she messages him again.

What do you guys suggest I do?

Again, your associations with other people are your own responsibility. And those associations are founded on your ability to judge the character of the person. Blame this girl for being who she is if you like, but you're not in control of who she is, only of who you are and who you associate with.

Suggestions? Get your head out of the clouds (literally) and be more able to recognise better quality women. As far as this one is concerned, she's proven herself ineligible, and you need to just put it down to a learning example.

 

[Gan]

I'm done with her. She isn't worth sh*t. Thank you all for the advice, on to bigger and better things.