When She is Offended

[bigneil]

Last night a new girl started gushing romance and I sent what seemed like a relatively neutral reply.

I saw this morning that she had replied late by saying "I am sort of put off by this..."

My reply? Did I respond with an apology like "I'm sorry baby please forgive me I promise to change?"

No. Apologizing only makes a copy of whatever you are trying to undo.

Instead, I responded "Ok, well we are obviously not a good match if something like that put you off...".

I quickly received a huge apology from her about how she totally understands now and was ready to see me. She sent 20 texts planning our date for tomorrow.

Try this next time instead of apologizing.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Agree with the message, to apologize with women is a sure way to make the mess bigger cause it reinforce and confirms the problem (wheter it exists in their minds only or in reality).

A well faked reframe is the best solution in most cases and not only with women, few are the ones who accept and value sincere apologies so dont bother.

"Sorry I was wrong" becomes I own you something or you will be right anytime from now on in the average woman mind.

"There was a misurderstanding" is already a better option since there are no guilty parts.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I'm offended at how she got offended. It's so offensive.

 

[TheProspect]

I'm personally convinced that it is RARELY EVER necessary or helpful for a DJ to apologize.

I'm very good at this when it comes to plates and girlfriends. "Sorry" to me (when apologizing is necessary) is an action word and expressed through actions rather than words. Besides relating to being a DJ, my personal philosophy is that if you're sorry it implies you regret your behaviour, and if you regret your behaviour than you are unable to learn and grow from it.

However, being Canadian, I have ingrained in me to say "sorry" at very trivial times such as if someone walks in my way (or I walk in their way) and also to say "sorry?" if I need someone to repeat something lol

 

[El Payaso]

Last night a new girl started gushing romance and I sent what seemed like a relatively neutral reply.

I saw this morning that she had replied late by saying "I am sort of put off by this..."

My reply? Did I respond with an apology like "I'm sorry baby please forgive me I promise to change?"

No. Apologizing only makes a copy of whatever you are trying to undo.

Instead, I responded "Ok, well we are obviously not a good match if something like that put you off...".

I quickly received a huge apology from her about how she totally understands now and was ready to see me. She sent 20 texts planning our date for tomorrow.

Try this next time instead of apologizing.

Well handled.

 

[El Payaso]

Agree with the message, to apologize with women is a sure way to make the mess bigger cause it reinforce and confirms the problem (wheter it exists in their minds only or in reality).

A well faked reframe is the best solution in most cases and not only with women, few are the ones who accept and value sincere apologies so dont bother.

"Sorry I was wrong" becomes I own you something or you will be right anytime from now on in the average woman mind.

"There was a misurderstanding" is already a better option since there are no guilty parts.

Very very true.