"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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The #1 Way to Measure her Interest Level (Empirical research)

bigneil

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I kept a weekly interest level chart for my last relationship (and several prior). It is simply the number of days per week she initiated a text conversation.

12222201021101420122233454333344455112120 (2.25 average)

See the major hiccup from 5 to 1? That was the end of the relationship. It went from remarkably smooth to a jump of 4 standard deviations.

Here are some more key numbers: how many times per week did I initiate? Notice it was never more than 2 for the last 7 months? Other than the first 3 weeks, it only happened once.

14402002132102220210120011120112120212211 (1.33 average)

Here are the totals (number of days per week we texted, combined). Notice it is only 7 once?

26624203153203640332353465453456575324331 (3.58 average)

Summary:

If my last relationship was any indication...

1) If she likes you, she will initiate 2 or more times per week.
2) You should never initiate more than 2 times per week (closer to 1), except maybe in the first few weeks.
3) On average, it's best to communicate every other day.
4) She will initiate 58% of the time over the course of a successful relationship.
5) By quarter, she initiated 50%, 60%, 70% (90% of the first half of the last 3 month period, and 50% over the breakdown period).



 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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ubercat

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That s interesting but not empirical research. How do u eliminate other variables that may have a correlation?
 

EyeBRollin

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I kept a weekly interest level chart for my last relationship (and several prior). It is simply the number of days per week she initiated a text conversation.

12222201021101420122233454333344455112120 (2.25 average)

See the major hiccup from 5 to 1? That was the end of the relationship. It went from remarkably smooth to a jump of 4 standard deviations.

Here are some more key numbers: how many times per week did I initiate? Notice it was never more than 2 for the last 7 months? Other than the first 3 weeks, it only happened once.

14402002132102220210120011120112120212211 (1.33 average)

Here are the totals (number of days per week we texted, combined). Notice it is only 7 once?

26624203153203640332353465453456575324331 (3.58 average)
You have the right idea @bigneil and the research is great. However, there are a lot of half truths so it's simpler than that:


1) If she likes you, she will initiate 2 or more times per week.

Sort of. The more she likes you, the less the time there is between the date and the next time she initiates.

When my ex (who is still stalking me), was at 100% interest level, she would initiate twice a day. Knowing my stance on texting, most of the messages were anticipatory texts about how much she misses me or can't wait to rip my clothes off.

2) You should never initiate more than 2 times per week (closer to 1), except maybe in the first few weeks.
The only initiation you have to do is call or text her once a week to ask her out. Eventually, she will do 100% of the initiation, because she doesn't want to wait an entire week to feel your presence.

3) On average, it's best to communicate every other day.

It's more organic than that. Women do things based off how they feel. She may want to talk or hang out every day for 4-5 straight days, then keep to herself for three. Just stick to the plan of once a week to ask her out, and treat any earlier initiations from her as an opportunity to make the date for earlier. She'll start asking you out.

4) She will initiate 58% of the time over the course of a successful relationship.
No. She'll initiate 100% of the time over the course of a successful relationship. Here's a thought:

Will a woman doing 100% of the initiation ever dump you? She can't. It's a contradiction.

5) By quarter, she initiated 50%, 60%, 70% (90% of the first half of the last 3 month period, and 50% over the breakdown period).
Stop initiating entirely, and show me what that data looks like.


Good analysis though.
 

lizardking82

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I tend to agree with @deesade on this one for sure. I mean, if you don't initiate, you just bein' passive. Not so manly...
 

bigneil

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Ime closer to 100 times
Note the maximum number of days per week she can initiate is 7. Note it went 33334455 before it blew out. For those of you who say that doesn't mean anything, it meant more than 0000000.

That s interesting but not empirical research. How do u eliminate other variables that may have a correlation?
Empirical research means what happened. This is what happened.

What I wouldn't do to see her ex-husband's and other guy's numbers!

I never had any girl initiate 5 times per week before. Have any of you had a girl initiate 7 times per week?

IMO the fact this data predicted the end of the relationship with the hiccup shows that this data is useful. If any of you can produce another example over the long term I'd love to see it. This experiment can be reproduced.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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bigneil

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Mate, we already went through this in another thread. Getting women to initiate messaging with you doesn't mean much.

This girl never wanted to be exclusive with you.
Think it's a coincidence she divorced her husband at the very peak of her initiating with me?

Yes, we went over this. Stop humping your girl's leg every day. Let's see you get a HB9 to initiate 5 times per week. Then I'll tell you it meant nothing. Best girl I ever had.

I bet deesade sends smiley faces and says (laugh out loud) to his girls.

Note my number of initiations never had a hiccup. Yours would have looked like this:

77777777777777777777777777777777777777
 

bigneil

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Members, would you please say a prayer that I can find another 21 year old HB9 who I love to "play me" for 9 months?

And if her initiating 5 times per week doesn't mean anything, can she please initiate 5 times this week?

The data is what it is, but if you can't see a pattern, you are poor at pattern recognition.
 

bigneil

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She weren't high-interest. And if you ever had high-interest, you'd know the difference.
She weren't? Man, you have been drinking. Anyhow: prove it. You're an anti-seducer trying to defend your temporary position as someone with more likes than me. I estimate I will pass you around this fall. I'll be sure to send you a note when that happens. You never predicted one thing with this girl accurately.


0122233454333344455112120


The red period shows where she started saying "I love you". Notice the smoothness as I increased her interest level - week over week it never varies by more than 1 - until the divorce. Did she really divorce us both at the same time? Or is this just a setback?

I can only hope this pattern repeats at zero.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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I kept a weekly interest level chart for my last relationship (and several prior). It is simply the number of days per week she initiated a text conversation.

12222201021101420122233454333344455112120 (2.25 average)

See the major hiccup from 5 to 1? That was the end of the relationship. It went from remarkably smooth to a jump of 4 standard deviations.

Here are some more key numbers: how many times per week did I initiate? Notice it was never more than 2 for the last 7 months? Other than the first 3 weeks, it only happened once.

14402002132102220210120011120112120212211 (1.33 average)

Here are the totals (number of days per week we texted, combined). Notice it is only 7 once?

26624203153203640332353465453456575324331 (3.58 average)

Summary:

If my last relationship was any indication...

1) If she likes you, she will initiate 2 or more times per week.
2) You should never initiate more than 2 times per week (closer to 1), except maybe in the first few weeks.
3) On average, it's best to communicate every other day.
4) She will initiate 58% of the time over the course of a successful relationship.
5) By quarter, she initiated 50%, 60%, 70% (90% of the first half of the last 3 month period, and 50% over the breakdown period).


You can not be serious!:D
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

bigneil

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You're ... smart.. big boy.
Freudian slip?

This reminds me of when she said "I love your warm hands".

You can not be serious!:D
Not an argument. Try having a point (besides that you are bisexual and send faggy smiley faces on a male forum). What's next, a photo of you in lingerie?

Tips on having a point (it makes it SO much easier on the reader!): provide something called evidence to the contrary.

Do you guys see that pattern that goes like this: 012345?

Oh, that.
 

bigneil

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It's just so incredibly geeky! Where's the suaveness in that kind of analysis?
"Just so geeky"? That's your point?

You just set off my chick detector.

Here is the sad reality my "geeky" data showed: if your girl isn't initiating twice a week, she likes someone else more.

Several days before she told me about her divorce I had already observed, using this simple formula of how often the girl initiates, that something major had changed.

The whole idea of "suaveness" is predicting the future, predicting female behavior. Oh, that.

For you "DJ's" to be so vehemently opposed to the concept that SHE should INITIATE more (exactly what Coach Corey Wayne says) shows you don't have women initiating. Keep humping their legs.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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"Just so geeky"? That's your point?

You just set off my chick detector.

Here is the sad reality my "geeky" data showed: if your girl isn't initiating twice a week, she likes someone else more.

Several days before she told me about her divorce I had already observed, using this simple formula of how often the girl initiates, that something major had changed.

The whole idea of "suaveness" is predicting the future, predicting female behavior. Oh, that.

For you "DJ's" to be so vehemently opposed to the concept that SHE should INITIATE more (exactly what Coach Corey Wayne says) shows you don't have women initiating. Keep humping their legs.
The micro-analysis reflects obsessive behavior.... a more feminine trait don't you think?
 
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"Just so geeky"? That's your point?

You just set off my chick detector.

Here is the sad reality my "geeky" data showed: if your girl isn't initiating twice a week, she likes someone else more.

Several days before she told me about her divorce I had already observed, using this simple formula of how often the girl initiates, that something major had changed.

The whole idea of "suaveness" is predicting the future, predicting female behavior. Oh, that.

For you "DJ's" to be so vehemently opposed to the concept that SHE should INITIATE more (exactly what Coach Corey Wayne says) shows you don't have women initiating. Keep humping their legs.
are you really quoting c.wayne in ss? that is sad dude.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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