Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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At what point are you spending too much on a chick?

9Volt

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They say money can't buy you love.

At what point are you spending too much on a chick where you go from just paying for a fun date or dates to spending your money specifically in an attempt to get a chick you pedestalize to "like" you and being a pandering provider?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Urbanyst

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You are spending too much money once you find yourself spending out of insecurity instead of desire.

All money you spend on women should feel natural like with your friends and family. If you are spending money in an attempt to force a relationship to work, it means you are desperate.
 

RangerMIke

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When you start thinking you are spending too much time with her... you are spending too much time with her.
 

Roober

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Spending should be 50/50. Guys pay a bit more up front.

What kinds of spending are you talking about?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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9Volt

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You are spending too much money once you find yourself spending out of insecurity instead of desire.

All money you spend on women should feel natural like with your friends and family. If you are spending money in an attempt to force a relationship to work, it means you are desperate.
Couldn't have said it better myself.
 

EyeBRollin

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When you are spending anything on her?

Well, that is a bit extreme......but let me put it this way....if you make 40G per year and she makes 40G per year.........why are you spending ANY money paying her way? HMMM?
Not only is this extreme, it is classless. You won't get anywhere with quality women by being a cheap ****. If you ask a woman out, you better get the damn bill. IF she asks you out, then you let her pay.

Don't let a woman pay for any of the first 3 dates. They offer in the beginning so they don't feel indebted to you. (Hint: If I pay, I don't "owe" him sex).

If she wants to pay, tell her to plan and take you out on a date.
 

Urbanyst

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Not only is this extreme, it is classless. You won't get anywhere with quality women by being a cheap ****. If you ask a woman out, you better get the damn bill. IF she asks you out, then you let her pay.

Don't let a woman pay for any of the first 3 dates. They offer in the beginning so they don't feel indebted to you. (Hint: If I pay, I don't "owe" him sex).

If she wants to pay, tell her to plan and take you out on a date.
So a quality woman only has sex for money?
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Not only is this extreme, it is classless. You won't get anywhere with quality women by being a cheap ****. If you ask a woman out, you better get the damn bill. IF she asks you out, then you let her pay.

Don't let a woman pay for any of the first 3 dates. They offer in the beginning so they don't feel indebted to you. (Hint: If I pay, I don't "owe" him sex).

If she wants to pay, tell her to plan and take you out on a date.
Tell me then, why are there guys out there who are fvcking beautiful women without even having to go out on dates? Without having to spend money on anything? Why are there men who have the woman pay for them (Soflobro is an example)? This is flawed logic.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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EyeBRollin

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Quite funny isn't it? EyeBrollin obviously doesn't value himself very much. Having low self-esteem and begging to pay for women hardly raises you up in their eyes and make them think you are a high value man.

But if that is the best you can do........we understand. Well, not really....but we will say we do,.
Lol. Aww, you can't afford to take a woman on a date? Learn some social skills, then you can contribute more effectively to the forum.

So a quality woman only has sex for money?
You're reading comprehension is actually that bad?
 

EyeBRollin

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Tell me then, why are there guys out there who are fvcking beautiful women without even having to go out on dates? Without having to spend money on anything? Why are there men who have the woman pay for them (Soflobro is an example)? This is flawed logic.
You can be an ass and have women pay for you up front. It's basic social skills that the person who extends the invite to any function is the one that pays.

"This is flawed logic."

Ditch your logic. This is a forum about the most illogical creatures on the planet (women).
 

9Volt

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You can be an ass and have women pay for you up front. It's basic social skills that the person who extends the invite to any function is the one that pays.

"This is flawed logic."

Ditch your logic. This is a forum about the most illogical creatures on the planet (women).
^^Gotta say this is correct. You invite. you pay. if a chick never even offers to show reciprocation you drop her because she's most likely entitled and or using you as a second income.

though chicks aren't illogical. they just have their own motives.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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You can be an ass and have women pay for you up front. It's basic social skills that the person who extends the invite to any function is the one that pays.

"This is flawed logic."

Ditch your logic. This is a forum about the most illogical creatures on the planet (women).
That's a good point. But it shouldn't apply to dates on a woman because you aren't sure if you will ever see her again. And a lot of tines that stuff could be pretty expensive.
 

playa99

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It is a widely upheld social convention that the man pays for the first date. It is courteous for a woman to offer to pay her fair share or offer to pay for the second date. I don't think this qualifies as paying a woman to spend time with you.

Would you class buying a buddy a beer as paying him to spend time with you?

You are paying too much when the expectation is that you pay.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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EyeBRollin

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^^Gotta say this is correct. You invite. you pay. if a chick never even offers to show reciprocation you drop her because she's most likely entitled and or using you as a second income.
Correct, and this was my point that these fake DJs can't seem to comprehend.
 

EyeBRollin

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Dude I am quite sure I can afford to take a woman on a date as well as you.In fact, I am pretty sure I can afford to do it MORE than you. The difference is, I don't HAVE to.....which apparently, you do. If I ask a woman out, I will pay the first time, since I asked. If I am going to continue to date her, she will pay her own way - I don't pay women to spend time with me.. You do. There has got to be a reason why you have to pay for a woman's time, and I don't. They obviously are willing to pay their own way, to be my GF. They are obviously not willing to pay their own way to be yours.
Are you done with your tirade?

Once you pay for the first 3 dates, as you advocate, how do you NOT pay for all the following ones? You have set the pattern, and expectation. So if you date for two years, you pay the whole shot. Yeah..............go ahead. Not for me.
Usually by the 3rd date they are offering to pay, to which I tell them if they like to pay, they should take me out. They end up picking up the tab on the following outing.

If you WANT to always pay, if You feel YOU need to always pay? Go ahead! But don't tell others on here it is necessary . I have never even had to have this conversation with my GF. She has stepped up from day one.
I don't always pay, but you can't read well.

You mention social skills? If I have no problem getting a girlfriend, and they are HAPPY to pay their own way..........what am I doing so right? Why can't you do this? Why do you have to pay women to spend time with you?
Reading is fundamental. Read the following post slowly:


IF she asks you out, then you let her pay.

Don't let a woman pay for any of the first 3 dates. They offer in the beginning so they don't feel indebted to you. (Hint: If I pay, I don't "owe" him sex).

If she wants to pay, tell her to plan and take you out on a date.
Understand?

That's a good point. But it shouldn't apply to dates on a woman because you aren't sure if you will ever see her again. And a lot of tines that stuff could be pretty expensive.
You have to learn to lose before you can win. That's life. If you are afraid of wasting your $50 on a date, you won't make it very far at finding the right woman. It's strictly a numbers game.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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You have to learn to lose before you can win. That's life. If you are afraid of wasting your $50 on a date, you won't make it very far at finding the right woman. It's strictly a numbers game.
I still find this rediculous. Experience may be the best teacher, but it is not the only teacher, you can learn from others as well. I don't believe that you should spend a whole lot of money on women just to get to know her. Perhaps other ways. The world is messed up right now so my ideology is a bit of a fantasy a suppose.
 

EyeBRollin

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I still find this rediculous. Experience may be the best teacher, but it is not the only teacher, you can learn from others as well. I don't believe that you should spend a whole lot of money on women just to get to know her. Perhaps other ways. The world is messed up right now so my ideology is a bit of a fantasy a suppose.
You're ideology is screwy if you're so cheap to go dutch on drinks. You shouldn't go dutch man; it's a date. If you want her to pay, wait for her to take you out.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

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