Hi,
So a little bit of background. We are both in college and met because share one of our classes together. I remember during the first day of class when I first saw her, I immediately knew what I wanted. She is gorgeous. We locked eyes a couple times that day but i never did anything. Before the second day of class, I came early hoping to meet her to try to start a conversation.
I saw her sitting by herself upon which i made an introduction. I sat down, had a little bit of small talk before she laid it on me. She was engaged to her high-school sweetheart of 5 years. I immediately backed off after that. No talking, other than basic comments about school.
Fast-foward to fall-break:
I hadn't seen her in awhile since the break and by the next class, we already started sitting together, she told me she ended it with her fiance over the break. At first i was kinda blown away, then i took my chances. I immediately ask for her number claiming that now we really have to go out dancing one day. (My jobs while I am in school is a dance instructor and personal trainer)
We end up talking via text everyday for what it seemed like 2 weeks straight. I start progressing the convo, showing my intentions of wanting to date/be in a relationship with her. I finally asked her out on a date in which she then called me so cute and immediately said yes. We have a great date and i pick up the bill. Everything was there body language, the trading of conversation, and the way time flew by. she even states "I hope you know what your getting into. I'm crazy" in which i smiled and said "yes, i know and like what i am getting into." She obviously liked that answer.
I take her home and walk her to her door. At first we hugged, then paused for a second, then both mutually went back in for a kiss. It was a nice smooch to end a great night. We still mutually text/talk back and forth. With all the good-nights and good-morning texts
A couple day later I had a 'talk' with her that i initiated because i wanted to make sure we were on the same page because of the events that were happening. Her ex-fiance was crazy. he was obviously not too thrilled about them breaking up and was going nuts. Before our date, her friends were taking her out to clubs and what not. You know, helping her through the transition.
He used to wail at her asking about she never used to go out like this and etc. (she never had the chance really because he was long distance aka went to a different school). Her parents were super invested in this guy also. They continued to invite her ex to the house and whatnot after she ended it with him. AND HE WOULD ACCEPT. Still trying to get her back and what not
She however did not like that and would escape with her friends every chance she got. This was making her not want a relationship with anyone. (mind you this is happening in the background of us starting to talk. She would share with me all the details, which was big because she was very independent and keep her feelings locked up.)
backing up to the talk we had
she talked about how comfortable she is with me and he she enjoys talking about life with me. She actually could open up to me and that surprised her. I shared how i wanted this to work out and ask her to tell me if i ever cross a line or push too much too fast let me know. She says she wants to take it slow and needs time to adjust, along with her parents. (who still are trying to keep the ex in the picture)
Fast-forword again:
Things have calmed down. The ex is starting to give up and finally deleted pictures of her. (she shared this with me/ keeps me updated)
We can calmly talk and joke about future plans and what not. (meaning meeting each other parents and other future ideas like whose cooking <--haha etc) The only thing is, we dont text message like we used to. I imagine the initial euphoria wore off, but you know who doesn't miss that?
We meet up before class and continue to share and catch up with each other but most outside communication has stopped. I try reaching out a little bit but I figure you needs some space and some 'me time' with her close friends to become level headed again. She has warned me before that sometimes she does this "silence" not because she doesnt like me, it is just her thing. She also expressed how guys dont make it trough these periods. (this was during our talk)
One day she bailed on a hike that we were supposed to go on. No communication, no cancellation. Come to find out she got injured a day before and was just really stress out from the ex thing and her parents.
I thanked her for telling me about the "silence periods" one day in person because i told her if i had not known that i probably would have been gone by now. I said "i know you do it, but it still sucks and i dont like it." she says "i know". then i said "i would be gone... but i know your worth it".
I gave this with extreme eye contact.
fast foward:
outside talking is still not really happening but we still talk about life etc (i talked about things i wanted to do and she tell me her ex never did that type of stuff for her +1 for me right?).
One day she borderline almost broke down on me about how her parents and ex were handling the situation. I consoled her just listening while i reached and grabbed for her hand. The furthest i went was simply rubbing her back. The end of that day as i walked her to her car (as i always do) she stopped and thanked me for helping her so much through everything.
the next time we meet i first ask how she felt about our last date and she said it was "refreshing" and she "needed to go out with me again" (mind you i had ask her to hang out a few times after our first date but she never came through. "ill let you know" type deal)
I grab her hand and ask her out on another date. she says yes, and i immediately set a date for next week.
Question time~~
we have known each other since school started (end of august)
i believe fall break was mid September (the break up with fiance)
first date was like mid october
friends on all social media sources (but she never likes my stuff lol) I think she blocked me from snap chat from seeing her stories because she did things to get back at her ex she didn't want me to see (like pictures with guys he hates etc) She has told me this, but not about the blocking... i assumed because i never saw these pictures she said she posted.
second date will be early december -we only see each other once a week in class
I planned to buy her flowers (first time) and i am taking her to one of my favorite spots. Now should i be worried about the low outside communication? is this her way of getting moments of time before she gets into another relationship? Am i taking the right steps here with the slow pace?
I was thinking about asking for clarity again but i figure since she said yes to the second date i would do it then??
Lastly, she is going away for a trip and may need someone to watch her dog for 10 days. problem is her original person was going to sleep at their house while they are away recently backed out. I would offer my services but this would push her to introduce me to her parents because i am sure they wouldn't want a stranger sleeping in their house for 10 days. (i figure this is a two birds one stone thing) They meet me and see that i am a nice person etc. good idea?
thank you for your time!!
So a little bit of background. We are both in college and met because share one of our classes together. I remember during the first day of class when I first saw her, I immediately knew what I wanted. She is gorgeous. We locked eyes a couple times that day but i never did anything. Before the second day of class, I came early hoping to meet her to try to start a conversation.
I saw her sitting by herself upon which i made an introduction. I sat down, had a little bit of small talk before she laid it on me. She was engaged to her high-school sweetheart of 5 years. I immediately backed off after that. No talking, other than basic comments about school.
Fast-foward to fall-break:
I hadn't seen her in awhile since the break and by the next class, we already started sitting together, she told me she ended it with her fiance over the break. At first i was kinda blown away, then i took my chances. I immediately ask for her number claiming that now we really have to go out dancing one day. (My jobs while I am in school is a dance instructor and personal trainer)
We end up talking via text everyday for what it seemed like 2 weeks straight. I start progressing the convo, showing my intentions of wanting to date/be in a relationship with her. I finally asked her out on a date in which she then called me so cute and immediately said yes. We have a great date and i pick up the bill. Everything was there body language, the trading of conversation, and the way time flew by. she even states "I hope you know what your getting into. I'm crazy" in which i smiled and said "yes, i know and like what i am getting into." She obviously liked that answer.
I take her home and walk her to her door. At first we hugged, then paused for a second, then both mutually went back in for a kiss. It was a nice smooch to end a great night. We still mutually text/talk back and forth. With all the good-nights and good-morning texts
A couple day later I had a 'talk' with her that i initiated because i wanted to make sure we were on the same page because of the events that were happening. Her ex-fiance was crazy. he was obviously not too thrilled about them breaking up and was going nuts. Before our date, her friends were taking her out to clubs and what not. You know, helping her through the transition.
He used to wail at her asking about she never used to go out like this and etc. (she never had the chance really because he was long distance aka went to a different school). Her parents were super invested in this guy also. They continued to invite her ex to the house and whatnot after she ended it with him. AND HE WOULD ACCEPT. Still trying to get her back and what not
She however did not like that and would escape with her friends every chance she got. This was making her not want a relationship with anyone. (mind you this is happening in the background of us starting to talk. She would share with me all the details, which was big because she was very independent and keep her feelings locked up.)
backing up to the talk we had
she talked about how comfortable she is with me and he she enjoys talking about life with me. She actually could open up to me and that surprised her. I shared how i wanted this to work out and ask her to tell me if i ever cross a line or push too much too fast let me know. She says she wants to take it slow and needs time to adjust, along with her parents. (who still are trying to keep the ex in the picture)
Fast-forword again:
Things have calmed down. The ex is starting to give up and finally deleted pictures of her. (she shared this with me/ keeps me updated)
We can calmly talk and joke about future plans and what not. (meaning meeting each other parents and other future ideas like whose cooking <--haha etc) The only thing is, we dont text message like we used to. I imagine the initial euphoria wore off, but you know who doesn't miss that?
We meet up before class and continue to share and catch up with each other but most outside communication has stopped. I try reaching out a little bit but I figure you needs some space and some 'me time' with her close friends to become level headed again. She has warned me before that sometimes she does this "silence" not because she doesnt like me, it is just her thing. She also expressed how guys dont make it trough these periods. (this was during our talk)
One day she bailed on a hike that we were supposed to go on. No communication, no cancellation. Come to find out she got injured a day before and was just really stress out from the ex thing and her parents.
I thanked her for telling me about the "silence periods" one day in person because i told her if i had not known that i probably would have been gone by now. I said "i know you do it, but it still sucks and i dont like it." she says "i know". then i said "i would be gone... but i know your worth it".
I gave this with extreme eye contact.
fast foward:
outside talking is still not really happening but we still talk about life etc (i talked about things i wanted to do and she tell me her ex never did that type of stuff for her +1 for me right?).
One day she borderline almost broke down on me about how her parents and ex were handling the situation. I consoled her just listening while i reached and grabbed for her hand. The furthest i went was simply rubbing her back. The end of that day as i walked her to her car (as i always do) she stopped and thanked me for helping her so much through everything.
the next time we meet i first ask how she felt about our last date and she said it was "refreshing" and she "needed to go out with me again" (mind you i had ask her to hang out a few times after our first date but she never came through. "ill let you know" type deal)
I grab her hand and ask her out on another date. she says yes, and i immediately set a date for next week.
Question time~~
we have known each other since school started (end of august)
i believe fall break was mid September (the break up with fiance)
first date was like mid october
friends on all social media sources (but she never likes my stuff lol) I think she blocked me from snap chat from seeing her stories because she did things to get back at her ex she didn't want me to see (like pictures with guys he hates etc) She has told me this, but not about the blocking... i assumed because i never saw these pictures she said she posted.
second date will be early december -we only see each other once a week in class
I planned to buy her flowers (first time) and i am taking her to one of my favorite spots. Now should i be worried about the low outside communication? is this her way of getting moments of time before she gets into another relationship? Am i taking the right steps here with the slow pace?
I was thinking about asking for clarity again but i figure since she said yes to the second date i would do it then??
Lastly, she is going away for a trip and may need someone to watch her dog for 10 days. problem is her original person was going to sleep at their house while they are away recently backed out. I would offer my services but this would push her to introduce me to her parents because i am sure they wouldn't want a stranger sleeping in their house for 10 days. (i figure this is a two birds one stone thing) They meet me and see that i am a nice person etc. good idea?
thank you for your time!!
