Moved too fast...

[Radar1234]

Last night went on an amazing night however I was dealt the biggest surprise. Were walking while holding hands and she tells me she was uncomfortable with me buying her stuff and making plans she basically said were moving to fast and she doesn't know what she wants out of life yet, is confused but wants us to remain friends. I walked her to her car still holding hands kissed her (she did not pull away) and told her I understand. Today I texted her as normal as she is currently involved in a project that I secured for her. After thinking about it she forwarded the mostly finish product and I told her I'll finish it and that I will get her check next week. Now my question is what to do next? My first thought it just to ignore her outright and whether she comes around or not, is this the right decision?

 

[sodbuster]

Why did you buy her ANYTHING? There is an implicit message that now she has to do something for you..... like sex. AFTER she sexes you up,at least 10 times. THEN you can get her a small gift. Then it's "thoughtful"

Back off a bit, don't be so needy or easy to connect with. See if she comes around.

 

[Radar1234]

I bought her flowers and a watch for Valentines day prior to that we had gone on several dates and hooked up with that said I will take your advice thank you any other input would be appreciated! This date was actually rescheduled by her and she drove out her way to meet me but i feel that she got the feelinh she was being pressured which was not my
Intention at all

 

[Desdinova]

I bought her flowers and a watch for Valentines day

You know what I got my GF for Valentine's day? A card. Not only that, it was a card that came out of a box of Valentines I bought for my kid to fill out for school. No watch, no flowers, nothing.

She made me a card, put on some lingerie, and fvcked me senseless.

You bought all that crap for her and she didn't even fvck you. You wasted your money. Quit wasting money on chicks you want to fvck. Reward the ones who happily fvck you without receiving lame gifts from you.

 

[Radar1234]

Having fun and hooking up worked really well for her. She was enjoying herself. She was enjoying you. Unknowingly perhaps, you changed the vibe with your gifts and making plans. She no longer feels free to just enjoy herself and have fun together. She perceives that your feelings have deepened and what you want from her is changing. She likely feels pressured as she is clearly not there yet and doesn't know if she will ever be. It can be really uncomfortable territory to navigate. Be aware. If there is a sense of expectation/or even hope that your deeper feelings be reciprocated by her, it creates an atmosphere of pressure rather than fun.

The best thing you can do to restore ease is remove all pressure. Focus on one date at a time only. For each date, the only intent is to have fun together and hook up. Have a good time together. No future talk. No deep feeling talk (unless she brings it up.) Just have fun, again, and again, and again.

If she gains deeper feelings too, she will certainly let you know. Know that pressuring her to reciprocate, even subtly, will push her away rather than bring her closer. Just keep having fun. If you are certain you want more from her and continuing to simply have fun isn't enough for you, than walk away, when you have had enough.

 

[Radar1234]

So I no contacted her...after 4 days she keeps trying to text to which i havent replied eventually texting me ?!!? Should i continue to no contact her or just reply in a cold manner

 

[Radar1234]

Thank you for all the help its been eye opening to read these forums