As a guy, I'm sick and tired of women that don't know me referring to me as "hun", "sweetie", "babe" or any variation of crap you'd say to someone you were dating or married to. Waitresses and bartenders are the worst about this type of behavior and it's insulting. It's even more insulting to sit around and hear women b!tch about guys doing it to them, only to turn around and do it to guys. I recently got into an argument about this while out with a group of friends (most were women) and they were like "oh it's nothing wrong with women calling you that! It's a term on endearment". Ummm, really? Well endear your ass on out of my face because I'm calling out this double standard. I consider it flirting, especially if the same girl who's calling me these names, turns around and says "oh I have a boyfriend" when you ask them out. Yeah, had that happen to me but that's not why I'm making this thread. Is anyone else noticing this crap and sick of it? There's a girl that works at the local Starbucks that is the absolute WORST about this and whenever I walk in it's always "babe this" or "sweetie that" or "honey" and the stupid b!tch has a boyfriend that she's supposedly "serious about". Well, Ms. Serious, you don't need to be talking to ME like that if you are so in love with your boyfriend.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Let's hash this $h!t out right now and settle it once and for all
- Thread starter Robert28
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
dustmuffin
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Chill out....this is common in the south.
Ok, well I'm from the South (born and raised) and I think it's bs. So you're saying the next random girl I see I can be like "hey baby!" and if she gets insulted then I can be like "chill out, it's the South! It's common!" Please, she'd holler sexual harassment in a heartbeat.
dustmuffin
Master Don Juan
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Double standard yes...you can roll with it or get your TWA t in a tich. I live in the south too. Waitresses use it to build rappor for better tips. I think most women in the service industry do the same. Guess you could go ape s hit on the next one that calls you sweetie and see how that goes for you. I don't really give a rats a as what they call me. If I am interested I will ask for a number...if rejected move on....
Nah I'm not going to flip out, I'd rather just give it back to them and see how they like it and follow up with "so since you've already started calling me by these names I'm guessing that means we are going on a date sometime?" Put their ass on the spot.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
In New Orleans it is common to call everyone baby, hun, sweetie... it means nothing.
Anyway so what... you can't control what other people do just how you respond to it. She starts talking like this and you are attracted to her try to move things along... if she's not available then just consider it's her loss and move on....
No reason to get all butt hurt about it and complain about a double standard. Is there a double standard... sure... men and women are not alike why would anyone believe behavior should be the same.
Try not to worry about it and just accept that is the way things are.
Anyway so what... you can't control what other people do just how you respond to it. She starts talking like this and you are attracted to her try to move things along... if she's not available then just consider it's her loss and move on....
No reason to get all butt hurt about it and complain about a double standard. Is there a double standard... sure... men and women are not alike why would anyone believe behavior should be the same.
Try not to worry about it and just accept that is the way things are.
JohnChops
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I call girls Hun all the time, I don't really see the issue with them saying it to you. Waitresses and bartenders are just trying to be nice
ImTheDoubleGreatest!
Master Don Juan
Well, I guess it's time to tell my grandma to **** off then.
Dhoulmagus
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Well leave the south. It is a ****hole anyway unless you have those good ole boy connections.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.