You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Then you still haven't put your own mind in order.
At least you're catching on to the external signals.
Go get 'em.
They do it for attention and validation. She cares about her feelings not yours.UPDATE: To anyone that originally posted, figured I'd come back around and talk about the aftermath of the situation. Nothing happened at all. I just cut off all contact with her cold turkey. I didn't unfriend her on FB (didn't wanna come off as immature or anything), and that's that. Silence. No text, No call, not even saying hi/acknowledging each other when we randomly bumped into each other on campus.
I did hit her up the other day for closure purposes but then I stopped. What good is it gonna do me to have her admit "yes I was just stringing you along." She wasn't worth the time, energy, or mental effort. Glad the store took back the item I purchased for her birthday as a gift (I threw out the receipt).
Out of complete curiosity, why would she do this to me? Maybe I'm just naive, but I'd never hurt a fly let alone a person by leading them on thinking I have feelings for them/are interested in a relationship beyond friendship when I'm truly not. That's just cold-hearted if you ask me. I've seen it on TV shows and stuff, but never assumed I'd be a victim of it one day
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Because she's selfish. The fact that you liked her so much made her feel good about herself, it made her feel valued. But she never cared about your feelings at all. Many women are like this.UPDATE: To anyone that originally posted, figured I'd come back around and talk about the aftermath of the situation. Nothing happened at all. I just cut off all contact with her cold turkey. I didn't unfriend her on FB (didn't wanna come off as immature or anything), and that's that. Silence. No text, No call, not even saying hi/acknowledging each other when we randomly bumped into each other on campus.
I did hit her up the other day for closure purposes but then I stopped. What good is it gonna do me to have her admit "yes I was just stringing you along." She wasn't worth the time, energy, or mental effort. Glad the store took back the item I purchased for her birthday as a gift (I threw out the receipt).
Out of complete curiosity, why would she do this to me? Maybe I'm just naive, but I'd never hurt a fly let alone a person by leading them on thinking I have feelings for them/are interested in a relationship beyond friendship when I'm truly not. That's just cold-hearted if you ask me. I've seen it on TV shows and stuff, but never assumed I'd be a victim of it one day