This could include LTR stuff AND the adjustments to DJing that is necessary once a person breaks out of the "AFC mode". If a discussion is started to discuss more greay area topics it always leads to a big debate about confusing the newbies. I think that a lot of the guys who are leaving would stay if there was more discussion that they could grow from. It consistently doesn't work to combine these kinds of topics with the topics designed to help newbies break out of the "AFC" mode. Anyone else feel the same way?
Hello Friend,
If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.
It will be the most efficient use of your time.
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Thank you for visiting and have a great day!
How about an Advanced DJing forum?
- Thread starter Wyldfire
- Start date
Believe it or not Gio, A LOT of guys who leave this site do so because it no longer has anything to offer to them. When growth stop, stagnation and boredom sets in. This site needs more meat to it to give the more developed DJs a reason to stick around and contribute. Giving them an opportunity to further their growth and wisdom is the only way to do that. For the life of me I don't get why more people don't realize this. It's so obviously a major problem for a lot of people.
sliderpro
Don Juan
---------------------------------------------
Yea this is a great idea. The problem is how to keep the newbies/young kids out of the forum. We are giving the same advice to everyone regardless of age which can be a dangerous thing for confused kids. I know what I would tell a 16yr old as opposed to an older person would be very differt in some situations.
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"you can't steal second base while clinging to first."
It's not really the newbies who are the ones interrupting these discussions. It is usually the DJs who still have a ways to go but have begun to put the methods here into practice...the "in between" DJs. The "jerky" DJs also interrupt these discussions. This interrupting renders it virtually impossible to have a mature and meaningful discussion about anything that isn't entirely black and white or consistent with the "pump and dump" mentality.
Giovanni Casanova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2002
- Messages
- 5,550
- Reaction score
- 18
- Age
- 44
- Location
- Hiding in Penkitten's Linen Closet
It doesn't matter how many forums you have or how you attempt to pigeonhole every conceivable topic, the vast majority of everyone -- advanced DJs and newbies alike are going to mainly post in the forums that are in existance right now, especially the existing Discussion Forum.
All you will succeed in doing is watering down the board as a whole. Besides that, who decides what is "advanced" and what isn't? Sounds like just another way to try to separate, segregate and be elitist.
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CASANOVA
"It is often merely for an excuse that we say things are impossible."
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"When we are unable to find tranquillity within ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere."
Francois De La Rochefoucauld
"We are more interested in making others believe we are happy than in trying to be happy ourselves."
Francois De La Rochefoucauld
"Absense diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire."
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"Before we set our hearts too much upon anything, let us examine how happy those are who already possess it."
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
All you will succeed in doing is watering down the board as a whole. Besides that, who decides what is "advanced" and what isn't? Sounds like just another way to try to separate, segregate and be elitist.
------------------
CASANOVA
"It is often merely for an excuse that we say things are impossible."
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"When we are unable to find tranquillity within ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere."
Francois De La Rochefoucauld
"We are more interested in making others believe we are happy than in trying to be happy ourselves."
Francois De La Rochefoucauld
"Absense diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire."
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
"Before we set our hearts too much upon anything, let us examine how happy those are who already possess it."
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
trickynick
Master Don Juan
Wyldfire,
I have addressed this problem the only way I think feel it can be. And that is creating a private forum away from this site and only invite desired participants.
This place is for the most part a train-the-newbie fest, which is fine but distracting when one attempts to evelvate the level of discussion. And no offense Wyldfire, but female posters distract from such discussions on here too.
I suggest everyone just retreat into their own communities to have discussions in which you don't want newbie input or feel would confuse newbies. Come here to get in on the boot camp action or to post your success stories and field tested findings.
I am in no way trying to separate people here, I am just looking out for this place. Hopefully the FAQ me and others are working on will help out here from the perspective of cracking down on all the repititious topics and improve the quality somewhat.
I think a lot of people get frustrated when the overall discussion atmosphere of the forum doesn't progess with them, so they try really hard to bring the place along. I guess I am doing that the only way I feel I can.
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You either own the game or it owns you!
[This message has been edited by trickynick (edited 03-30-2002).]
I have addressed this problem the only way I think feel it can be. And that is creating a private forum away from this site and only invite desired participants.
This place is for the most part a train-the-newbie fest, which is fine but distracting when one attempts to evelvate the level of discussion. And no offense Wyldfire, but female posters distract from such discussions on here too.
I suggest everyone just retreat into their own communities to have discussions in which you don't want newbie input or feel would confuse newbies. Come here to get in on the boot camp action or to post your success stories and field tested findings.
I am in no way trying to separate people here, I am just looking out for this place. Hopefully the FAQ me and others are working on will help out here from the perspective of cracking down on all the repititious topics and improve the quality somewhat.
I think a lot of people get frustrated when the overall discussion atmosphere of the forum doesn't progess with them, so they try really hard to bring the place along. I guess I am doing that the only way I feel I can.
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You either own the game or it owns you!
[This message has been edited by trickynick (edited 03-30-2002).]
Of course you feel that way Gio...you are one of the individuals who interrupt the very discussions I'm speaking of. I know you do it because you don't want newbies to be confused, but in the process of being protective of them you also stifle and stagnate the ability to have more involved, meaty and thought provoking conversations. That's why I think there really needs to be a place for people who want to have those kids of discussions to be able to have them without the interruptions. It makes no difference what it is called and would not have to cover any particular area other than being geared for the more advanced DJs who have already gotten all they can from the basic discussions.
Thank you for acknowledging that there is, indeed, a problem. I appreciate that. I know that my presence often leads to the distraction of topics. It's not something that I intend to happen at all. I'd much rather discuss the thought provoking topics. And in all fairness...any distractions that I am involved in involves others besides me who take an equal part in getting things off on a tangent. I don't like that any more than you do and am trying very hard to nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand. I do understand what you're saying, though.
trickynick
Master Don Juan
For the record, I am just as curious as everyone else as to Wyldfire's intense preoccupation with this site, but she does raise a valid point here.
However, I will also add in addition to my previous comments that separating groups of people on the site is going to be impossible and really shouldn't be tried (that's why I didn't).
Once you get to a certain point in you Don Juan abilities, most of us want to give somthing back to the board that helped bring us to where we are. But attempts to elevate the level of discussion are usually frustrating because people who have not progressed to the level at which they would have something to contribute feel the need to chime in on these discussions and the female posters do too. This being an open forum, who is anybody to say they can't?
The problem is that the need to dispell misconceptions and wrong information being posted on such topic brings threads hopelessly off topic. I've seen it happen.
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You either own the game or it owns you!
However, I will also add in addition to my previous comments that separating groups of people on the site is going to be impossible and really shouldn't be tried (that's why I didn't).
Once you get to a certain point in you Don Juan abilities, most of us want to give somthing back to the board that helped bring us to where we are. But attempts to elevate the level of discussion are usually frustrating because people who have not progressed to the level at which they would have something to contribute feel the need to chime in on these discussions and the female posters do too. This being an open forum, who is anybody to say they can't?
The problem is that the need to dispell misconceptions and wrong information being posted on such topic brings threads hopelessly off topic. I've seen it happen.
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You either own the game or it owns you!
I covered the first part in my last post.
Now, there is a special High School area because teenagers have different concerns, issues and discussions that appeal to them. I don't even visit that forum enough to say that I participate there.
Just as with highschoolers, the more advanced DJs have different interests, issues and concerns than do the guys who are first starting out or just beginning to develop as a DJ. I honestly see no difference in having an area set aside for the Advanced DJs than having the High School forum. It would also prevent quite a few of the wise and knowledgeable contributors from disappearing due to stagnation.
I don't think it's about segregating people. Different kinds of topics have different forums to make it easier for people to find the kind of information they are looking for.
To look at this in a rational way...the fact that the problem exists is something many people agree with. So what is the best solution? Do nothing and continue to lose valuable members who become frustrated? It's possible that something like this wouldn't work, but it's also possible that it would. No one will ever know if it isn't at least attempted. And really...what harm would it do to try?
~The_Chosen~
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 18, 2002
- Messages
- 889
- Reaction score
- 1
- Age
- 39
Just have a forum just for posters with Master DJ status.
So whatever advance DJing forum is only for Master DJ's who already know alot of their sh!t.
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~The_Chosen~ has spoken...
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is just not an act but a habit." - Aristotle
Judge a man by his questions and not his answers.
So whatever advance DJing forum is only for Master DJ's who already know alot of their sh!t.
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~The_Chosen~ has spoken...
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is just not an act but a habit." - Aristotle
Judge a man by his questions and not his answers.
It's not about how long you post here, how many posts or any of that. It would just be a section devoted to more thought provoking and involved discussions for anyone who would want to discuss things more deeply than the basics. Nothing should be off limits to all posters here besides the moderators forum. Just the fact it would be in a different forum would help people differentiate between what is basic and has to be learned first and what advice and discussion is for more complex issues. I think it would allow for more involved conversation without having to explain all the time that you are speaking of LTRs or the advice is for DJs who are more secure in their abilities. Just like the High School forum is where you go to discuss high school related issues...an advanced DJ forum would be where to go to discuss issues related to more complex and involved topics.
You could make the forum by invitation only. Posting is controlled by passwords, after all. But I wouldn't call it "the advanced forum" because then everyone will be wanting to go there.
If I am not mistaken, I am guessing that what Wyldfire is hoping to do is to somehow get a forum-like conversation going between those DJ's who share an interest in LTR's.
I don't mean advice on "maintaining" a good relationship. There are many books on that, and besides, talking about that stuff to some group can actually be divisive, fostering a bond with the group members at the expense of a person's connection with their "significant other" who is the one they should be talking to about stuff like that.
What I mean is basically the same DJ topics of finding, meeting, attracting, and bedding women but with the added ingredient that you are interested in finding someone that you really click with.
In some ways I hesitate to use the term LTR, because for many guys (myself included) the term LTR sometimes conjurs up this image of being roped into something LONG TERM with someone that you don't want to be with LONG TERM.
In other words, discussing "LTR's" often feels a bit like you're putting the cart before the horse. That's because the focus really should be not on LONG TERM, but on finding someone that you have fantastic chemistry with. If you do that, then there is naturally a high likelihood of an LTR emerging from that.
In my experience, meeting women in bars and clubs constitutes ZERO screening for personal chemistry. The girl may look hot, (especially when she's wearing layers of makup, the lighting is dim and red, you are drunk, she is drunk, you can't even hear each other clearly over the music). Is it any wonder that as far as real chemistry is concerned, it's pure roulette?
Even if you pick up dozens and dozens of women, if you do it in bars you might as well be picking women randomly from a phone book as far as finding good chemistry is concerned. So the notion of "narrow down your selection to a few special women" doesn't mean much, if your method of meeting women is a form of "personality roulette" in the first place.
Who gives a sh*t about "chemistry" I can hear TrickyNick asking? Valid question. If you're at the point in your life where all you want is some hot sex (or if that is what you happen to be in the mood for at the moment) then all this talk about finding someone whom you "click" with will be irrelevant.
On the other hand, if you're at the point in your life where you like the idea of doing a lot of things together with the same woman then making sure she is someone you will truly ENJOY spending time with becomes highly relevant.
So I am guessing that the added ingredient of the alternate group that Wyldfire is talking about would most likely consist of all the usual DJ topics, but with an added focus on how to be meeting people you really click with, and how to know when you've met such a person. In practical terms that would most likely involve exploring themes like:
a) where to go to increase the chances of meeting women you genuinely click with
b) what can you do that will increase the chances of those women being drawn to you whom you are likely to have good chemistry with (it might be as simple as dressing in a way that more effectively broadcasts who you are), and
c) what can you do in your communication with women to determine as soon as possible in your interaction with them if they are someone that you have good chemistry with.
Anyway, that's all I can come up with off the top of my head. It's late and actually I just wanted to take a quick glance in here to see what's up with y'all. Take care,
DeepBlue
PS we need a sleepy face icon.
If I am not mistaken, I am guessing that what Wyldfire is hoping to do is to somehow get a forum-like conversation going between those DJ's who share an interest in LTR's.
I don't mean advice on "maintaining" a good relationship. There are many books on that, and besides, talking about that stuff to some group can actually be divisive, fostering a bond with the group members at the expense of a person's connection with their "significant other" who is the one they should be talking to about stuff like that.
What I mean is basically the same DJ topics of finding, meeting, attracting, and bedding women but with the added ingredient that you are interested in finding someone that you really click with.
In some ways I hesitate to use the term LTR, because for many guys (myself included) the term LTR sometimes conjurs up this image of being roped into something LONG TERM with someone that you don't want to be with LONG TERM.
In other words, discussing "LTR's" often feels a bit like you're putting the cart before the horse. That's because the focus really should be not on LONG TERM, but on finding someone that you have fantastic chemistry with. If you do that, then there is naturally a high likelihood of an LTR emerging from that.
In my experience, meeting women in bars and clubs constitutes ZERO screening for personal chemistry. The girl may look hot, (especially when she's wearing layers of makup, the lighting is dim and red, you are drunk, she is drunk, you can't even hear each other clearly over the music). Is it any wonder that as far as real chemistry is concerned, it's pure roulette?
Even if you pick up dozens and dozens of women, if you do it in bars you might as well be picking women randomly from a phone book as far as finding good chemistry is concerned. So the notion of "narrow down your selection to a few special women" doesn't mean much, if your method of meeting women is a form of "personality roulette" in the first place.
Who gives a sh*t about "chemistry" I can hear TrickyNick asking? Valid question. If you're at the point in your life where all you want is some hot sex (or if that is what you happen to be in the mood for at the moment) then all this talk about finding someone whom you "click" with will be irrelevant.
On the other hand, if you're at the point in your life where you like the idea of doing a lot of things together with the same woman then making sure she is someone you will truly ENJOY spending time with becomes highly relevant.
So I am guessing that the added ingredient of the alternate group that Wyldfire is talking about would most likely consist of all the usual DJ topics, but with an added focus on how to be meeting people you really click with, and how to know when you've met such a person. In practical terms that would most likely involve exploring themes like:
a) where to go to increase the chances of meeting women you genuinely click with
b) what can you do that will increase the chances of those women being drawn to you whom you are likely to have good chemistry with (it might be as simple as dressing in a way that more effectively broadcasts who you are), and
c) what can you do in your communication with women to determine as soon as possible in your interaction with them if they are someone that you have good chemistry with.
Anyway, that's all I can come up with off the top of my head. It's late and actually I just wanted to take a quick glance in here to see what's up with y'all. Take care,
DeepBlue
PS we need a sleepy face icon.
northernpride
Senior Don Juan
Fair enough...more than fair enough. I've been acting like a total d ick lately wyldfire.
[This message has been edited by northernpride (edited 03-31-2002).]
DeepBlue...it's actually more than that. I mean, what happened when you made the recent post about being realistic about nexting? Instead of having a serioius, thought provoking conversations about a topic you, as a DJ, feel is important it turned into a pissing contest of why we all have to always encourage lost of "nexting". It's frustrating. If you want to have a deeper discussion about ANY topic on the main forum this same thing happens every time. These meaty discussions just can't co-exist on that forum and be productive. It doesn't really matter what it's called or how it's divided, but there is a need to separate the areas for the general discussions for newbies and those who want to adjust things here or there or whatever. But damn, there just has to be something done to offer more to the people who will otherwise disappear. A question...if there were something like this provided would you be more likely to stay? I read that you were going to take a break from here, that's why I ask.
1) I don't care if Wyldfire's here anymore.
2) I'm getting bored with this website.
3) #1 is because of #2.
I don't mean to sound disrespectful, but, as hard as I try, I'm not learning much here anymore. I keep coming here, but when I read the titles in the discussion forum, I just think, "It's the same sh!t, over and over." This is why I post jokes in "Anything Else", go in the chat room, and look for anything with Wyld's name on it, hoping to get in on an argument, maybe kick up some sh!t.
I'm actually starting to wonder if I've gotten everything I possibly can out of this site. I hope that's not true, because in no way do I feel like a "Master Don Juan". Not at all. Why am I even sitting here right now? Where are all the chicks? Why don't I have about a thousand numbers I could call right now? I know it's up to me, but I'm hoping there really is more to learn, or else I'm screwed, and not in a good way.
However, I don't think what Wyldfire's suggesting is the answer, simply because in no time at all, it will be flooded by newbies and sixpaks wasting everyone's time and frustrating the people who really want to learn. Everybody is going to think they're advanced enough, then they'll be giving advice like, "use kino" and "act like a jerk". Hey, thanks Einstein.
Don't know what the answer is, but I don't think this is it.
2) I'm getting bored with this website.
3) #1 is because of #2.
I don't mean to sound disrespectful, but, as hard as I try, I'm not learning much here anymore. I keep coming here, but when I read the titles in the discussion forum, I just think, "It's the same sh!t, over and over." This is why I post jokes in "Anything Else", go in the chat room, and look for anything with Wyld's name on it, hoping to get in on an argument, maybe kick up some sh!t.
I'm actually starting to wonder if I've gotten everything I possibly can out of this site. I hope that's not true, because in no way do I feel like a "Master Don Juan". Not at all. Why am I even sitting here right now? Where are all the chicks? Why don't I have about a thousand numbers I could call right now? I know it's up to me, but I'm hoping there really is more to learn, or else I'm screwed, and not in a good way.
However, I don't think what Wyldfire's suggesting is the answer, simply because in no time at all, it will be flooded by newbies and sixpaks wasting everyone's time and frustrating the people who really want to learn. Everybody is going to think they're advanced enough, then they'll be giving advice like, "use kino" and "act like a jerk". Hey, thanks Einstein.
Don't know what the answer is, but I don't think this is it.
Galactus wrote:
I don't think what Wyldfire's suggesting is the answer, simply because in no time at all, it will be flooded by newbies....
Actually, it should be possible to create the online equivalent of a private "glass room" by setting up a forum where the passwords used for posting are not generated automatically (as is currently the case) but are given out to select members who join the group "by invitation" only.
That way newbies and disruptors alike can see and read the advanced threads, but not post to them. They can hopefully learn from what they see, and they may even borrow from what they see and talk among themselves about the same themes--they just can't disrupt the discussion.
All you have to do is control the process of handing out the passwords that allow a person to post a message.
Then every two or three months we could hold a vote on who to add (or not add) to the forum based on the excellence (or crappiness) of the stuff they have posted in the regular DJ forum up to that point.
I think this advanced room that newbies can watch but not post to until they improve their own posts would add a new and exciting element to the site, and serve as a stimulus not only for improvement among newbies, but also serve as an incentive for more advanced people to stay.
If this arrangement turns out to be too daunting to implement, then as an alternative it might be possible to achieve a similar result within the existing DJ forum by tweaking the newsgroup software to allow the creation of special threads (distinguished by some color code or something like that) and only certain people would be able to post to those threads. But that would be a less clean, less "cool" approach.
Other than that, there is always the method used to keep the "moderators corner" private. But IMO, you lose something if the newbies can't even see the stuff we are posting.
DeepBlue
sliderpro
Don Juan
Not bad! Not bad at all...