Bourne's Journal of Approaches and Life - need feedback

[Bourne]

Wednesday 4.12.2006

Thanks everyone for the feedback. I'm loving this. I can feel life transforming slowly but surely into the right direction.

Keep me updated resilient, let me know how his workshop is and we’ll keep in touch. I know your game will be far and beyond anything you ever imagined after you are done with Juggler’s workshop.

You guys have to hear this. This is absolutely amazing news. It may sound wrong and bitter, but the sh1t that me and my ex went through and how right I was.

I went out with these 3 girls tonight, I had a great time. Absolutely amazing. They are great girls, and fun to be with and I am going to continue hanging out with them. They already accepted me into their circle. After a night of hanging out with them we all headed out to get some coffee at starbucks. This particular starbucks used to be where me and my ex-g/f used to go together. You may already see where this is going.

Me and these 3 gorgeous looking girls walk in and I automatically start looking around. Clear. Great. We walk up and get coffee, joking around, talking, teasing. As we are walking out, guess who walks in? None other then my ex-g/f. One month later. FVCK. Following her like a puppy dog comes in the same guy who she started to go out on friendly dates with when we were together. Was I right or what? She sees me together with these 3 girls and the expression on her face was priceless.

I know that sounds wrong to be that bitter. But I never did anything bad to her. I left her better person then I found her. I never mistreated her wrong. After I broke up with her she pissed and bitter at me, but the sh1t she was doing, who can you blame.

Great night.

 

[AudiTy]

I am willing to bet you dont even get to a 100 before you find a hot girl that you will probably start dating.

The way this kid's going, I'll give him till 40 :yes:

 

[Eggchen]

Bourne I'm amazed at your progress - keep up the good work and I love reading your updates. I want to see your transition from start to end. :rockon:

Just out of curiosity, where abouts are you?

 

[Bourne]

Thursday 4.13.2006

Thursday 4.13.2006

Thanks Eggchen. I'm in Florida.
Haha, Audity. We shall see.

FR: Approach #19 Starbucks (12pm)
Starbucks. I was running late for 12:30 class and stopped off at starbucks, even though I was running late I need my coffee. Starbucks today was ass soup. Each way I turned there was a good looking female. In a way you could say I had my pick to approach and practice. In front of me in line was standing gorgeous looking HB10. First time I was up against a hottie and I needed to approach. Nervous or not I had to find out and see if I could do it.

First minute went by. I was standing there, contemplating. STOP. Without any further hesitation and I don’t know how but words starting to come out of my mouth without thinking about it.

Me: What is your drink of choice?
HB10: I usually get so and so.
Me: Have you tried the new Blueberry Green Tea Frapuccino?
HB10: No, I usually get the same thing and don’t try new drinks.
Me: Haha, I’m kind of the same way. Some of these people even know what I drink and they start making it as soon as I get through the front door.

It was her turn, she ordered and payed for it. The worker asked her name. It was HB10. After I ordered my drink I walked up to next to her. Few seconds later.

Me: HB10 right? I’m Bourne.

I reached out and shook her hand. Hers on top of mine. The lady way of shaking her hand, not guy friendly.

HB10: Nice to meet you.
Me: Nice to meet you. Do you go to school HB10?
HB10: Yeah, I go to so and so, but right now I’m going down here to community college. I used to go to private so and so upstate.
Me: How do you like community college. I went there for a few years.
HB10: Its ok, I like smaller schools. I went to small private one.
Me: Same here, I go to a private art school right now and I love how you get to know everyone and see everyone pass by. Doesn’t matter what year they are in, you get to know them.
HB10: Yeah me too. What college you go to?
Me: So and So.
HB10: Awesome. I’m sorry I got to run, I actually have class right now.
Me: Me too, I have class at 12:30 and I’m going to be late. Nice to meet you.

I shook her hand again, looking her in the eyes. She had beautiful eyes.

I could have gotten her number. But didn’t. After I said nice to meet you, for a split second she just stood there and I knew she was surprised by that I didn’t even try to get her number. If I see her again, I’m in and will get her number then. If not, oh well, there are plenty out there to practice on. This was another smooth conversation I got into. On top of that she was the first HB10 I approached. Its not that scary guys, I promise. If I can do it, any of you can. And trust me when I say this. You can. Read what I’ve been through in last 6.5 years. You can and will do it. Just have the will and desire to.

Make sure if you are having success, do not letting go to your head. Keep doing it, keep improving, keep humble. And reap the rewards.

Plans for this weekend include:

• Ultimate Fighting Championship Party at friends house on Saturday
• Saturday morning, Kayaking with MILF
• Friday night, maybe going up to hooters and visiting my friend who is Djing there
• Lots of homework

Once you get the momentum going, it is TRUE, it keeps rolling. Just don’t stop and keep enjoying your life and the moment.

Cold Approach: 1 (19/100) since 03.25.06
DJ BootCamp Week 1: 26/50 Hellos

 

[AudiTy]

Congratz on your first HB10 !

I like how you're mentoring others now too, giving other people encouragement. Can't wait to hear how it goes with the Kayaking M.I.L.F. too, good luck!

 

[Potbelly]

Bourne that must have took balls to just start talking like that....

Next time I'm in that situation I'll pull a Bourne. Good move with the number thing. It's great to talk to people not expecting anything but to learn more about them. Greatest feeling in the world.

 

[Bourne]

Friday - Monday 4.14.2006 - 4.17.06

, Pull-A-Bourne.

Friday 4.14.2006
Went to Hooters where buddy of mine was djing. Spend good 2-3 hours there. Talked and took few pictures with Hooter girls. Made me think, most of these girls are paid to flirt with you. Picking one up from work would be a difficult task. On top of that I was thinking how would one game such location, where every single guy hits on every single girl in there. I had a lot of fun regardless what I was thinking. Just thoughts running through my head. Took good pics with cute Hooter girls.

Saturday 4.15.2006
Went Kayaking with MILF. Kayaking was fun as hell. Took a lot of pics too. A lot of inner contemplation about me, life, everything else while out there in the water. Now what happened with MILF you all wonder. Nothing. I had a great time with her. I wasn’t in such location or mood where I could do anything or try to game her. I don’t know if I can bring myself to do anything with her. She is kind of old. I think she likes me even more now, but now I’m not so sure about her.

Monday 4.17.2006

FR: Approach #20 BookStore (10pm)
Well, haha, let me tell you about the most bizarre and weird approach today. I am standing in line to get some coffee. I see a cute HB5-6 sitting at the table. I look over, she looks at me. I look back. Few moments later I look again, she is still looking. I smile and wave. Nothing. I say whatever, she keeps looking so once I’m done ordering I am going over there. I get my coffee and make it look like I don’t care to approach her. As I walk by the table I look at her.

Me: What are you studying?
HB5-6: I’m figuring out my life.
Me: Wow, that seems very interesting. How so?

I think to myself, wow, that seems very cool. I automatically pull up a chair and sit down at her table.

HB5-6: I’m a Christian. Are you a Christian?
Me: No, I don’t have a religion I follow.
HB5-6: Why not? God talks to me and I am able to figure out my life. I am trying to find a way to make more money and be prosperous.
Me: That is very interesting.

From here it goes into a weird conversation about

• Her talking about dreaming she is going to hell
• About her mom and her 5 boyfriends and her walking in on them having sex
• She reads me her short story that god told her to write
• She tries to sell me her hand made jewelry
• Kept asking non-stop questions about me and where I was from, how did I get here and just weird random sh1t.
• She was 21, cute and CRAZY

One bad part is, she asked me for my number and without really thinking it through I gave it to her. This story to be continued. :nervous:

Five minutes later I say nice to meet her and bail out. Interesting.

Cold Approach: (20/100) since 03.25.06

 

[resilient]

Hey Bourne, how's your approaches coming along? I'm going to use your "what are you studying?" line at a bookstore and see how that goes today. May end up sarging a big mall close my work. First time day gaming. I'm nervous, but it will help me get the rest of rejections in bootcamp week 4. Got my first #close of the bootcamp last Saturday. Stoked. Taking the girl out for ice cream later this week. It's rad to see the hard work paying off in the bootcamp.

 

[Bourne]

April 4.20.06 - April 4.23.06

April 4.20.06 - April 4.23.06

Congrats Resilient. What helps me at first now, the more I talk is ask open ended question or an opinion opener. Also making a statement helps alot too. They you pay attention to nouning. Pick words that she says and ask more about them. If anything else you can ask regular questions if she doesn't say much about herself. Like "where do you go to school", where do you work" etc. Also following up with a short statement or a story about youself in a situtation that you are talking about. "Yeah, I took those subjects in school few semester ago, I found it to be very challenging. What about you? Do you find them as challenging" or something along those lines. Good luck man, keep me updated how everything goes.

Thursday 4.20.2006
Well today, once again I saw my ex/gf with her puppy dog “friend”. I don’t think they are friends anymore, I think she held on to that branch and he is her puppy AFC of a b/f. I went to a food place that is open really late. I haven’t been there in 2 months. As I am walking out with my friend and my sister guess who walks in at the same time? That is right my friends, my ex g/f. What are the chances of me seeing her twice in one week at these random hard time-like locations? Its unfvcking belieable. I thought it might bother me sitting outside eating while they sat inside the place. But I was more pissed off then upset. Seeing how the guy she was with behaved made me sick. He is a classic case of AFC. I bet you she tells him all about me and he listens with a good ear. Twice that I saw them he was walking behind her, almost running after her as she is storming ahead of him. Pathetic. What in the world did I ever see in her?

Friday 4.21.2006
I was invited by a recently met girl from Russian to a art show. I went, had a lot of fun. Got to know her and hung out with her for a good while. She is HB8 and a step up for me from the usual HB5-6 that I usually date/hang out. Interacted with a lot of people and met a lot of new people as well. I was afraid that my ex/gf might show up there. Thy god she didn’t. Her friends on the other hand did. They came up to me talking about how they haven’t seen me in a long time.

Also at work I asked a HB7, older lady, in her 30s to go to a performance with me. Its her last day, she doesn't like the job and she was leaving that day. She is a MILF. She hesitated about giving me an answer but did want my phone number to keep in touch. Her loss, we would of had fun. I ended up inviting a russian hottie. Read on it later.

FR: Approach #21 Art Show (7 pm)
I was standing next to painting, analyzing it and enjoying it. Right next to me stood a good looking HB8 in a dress. HOT. This is perfect opinion opener/comment opener.

Me: What do you think about this?
HB8: I like it, I like the bottle.
Me: Yeah, I like the vibrant colors in this piece.

After that she left. She met up with her b/f. I didn’t care, but was it so hard to just interact with a stranger about discussing artwork? People are so closed off to everyone else.

Saturday 4.22.2006
I was invited again by three girls that I hang out with to go eat sushi and watch a movie after that. Never had sushi before and I tried something new today. Step out of your comfort zone and enjoy every moment that is new to you. Another day of really good interactions and hanging out with the ladies. I still get self-conscious being around and thinking how I act. It is one of my sticking points right now is getting rid of approval from others and being able to enjoy the moment and the present. Self-conscious is self-destructive behavior, because you start acting and looking how to please others. This helps me see how they interact with me and how they are around each other. There is alot of attraction between me and all three of them, but 2 of them have b/f and seeing how they interact and deal with that helps me understand women a bit.

Sunday 4.23.2006
I invited Russian HB8 to performance that I had free tickets to. I had a good time with her. Talked, laughed, and discussed about a lot of subjects. She is really cool. I can see though that she is high-maintenance and I don’t want anything more then a friend to hang out with and to fool around and sleep with. Regardless I think she really likes me. She asked a lot of questions about me and she was trying to qualify herself to me a lot. I teased her quiet a bit and disqualified her and tried to build higher value. I suppose what I was doing all that is I’m trying to use what I read here out in the real world.

Improve on:

• Being more confident and being decisive.
• Taking action and picking something. Instead of saying “Do you like this or that” Just make a decision and ask her if she likes to come with me then giving her the option to choose. LEAD.
• Being less self-concsious of what I do and what I say just to please other person. Just enjoy the moment without having an outcome in mind.
• Start closing for phone numbers.
• Start going out on dates.
• Start building attraction from the start and being charming and confident in everything I do. Interact and enjoy the moment. Make her part of my world and bring her into it.

Cold Approach: 1 (21/100) since 03.25.06

 

[Blackdragon5095]

I though at first you stopped your journal of approaches because I haven't seen new apporaches yet. I was gonna come down their and find you and beat your ass. J/K
You will be better off without your crazy e/x g/f. I bet she was saltly when she saw you with those 3 hot chicks. :crackup:


Edit.
Dude don't get wrapped around girls problems or bullcrap. Lose that chick, you didn't come this far to become some emotional pool for some crazy chick.

 

[Bourne]

Sunday 4.23.20 - one more sunday approach

Sunday 4.23.2006

Thanks for the support BlackDragon. No I'm not giving this up. I can see my progress from March 25 and its I have come alot in gaining new friends, few girls to hang out with, new confidence and 22 approaches, better conversation skills. Its exponential. I agree man, I'm not there to help them deal with their emotianal problems, I'm there to help them escape. I'm much better then I was 3-4 weeks ago about my ex. It is just time progression. The longer it is, the more I realize what in the world did I ever see in her? The sh1t that I put up with and went through, so much disrespect towards me and especially her towards my family, my sister and all of my friends. She was very bitter and an attention ***** but I was blinded by emotion.

But if I ever slack off on not posting my FRs, I will need a kick in the ass.

FR: Approach #22 Bookstore (7 pm)
Went to local Books a Million to check out some magazines. As I’m looking at Mens Health I notice a girl in uniform walking by me. She looks at magazines then walks up to my section and looks at magazines right next to me. I don’t hesitate and just say an opener.

Me: Where do you work?
HB5.5: At “name restaurant”.
Me: Do you like it?
HB5.5: Its ok.
Me: Are they still hiring over there. I was looking for summer server job but I wanted an inside scoop on the place.
HB5.5: Well, I don’t know, its ok, people don’t tip well, because they are mostly old.
Me: Your hesitation makes me reconsider if I want to work there. I had a friend of mine work there few years back for 2 hours and they she calls me up and tells me to pick her up. So that story right there tainted the whole place for me. So I was wondering maybe she was wrong.
HB5.5: No she wasn’t.
Me: haha

We then talk more about her job, but then she mentions how she is on break because she is a minor and few minutes later she leaves. I am now relating to people in conversation, I am now NOT asking non stop questions, but more making statements and relating and telling short stories and building attraction if you can call that right now.

Cold Approach: (22/100) since 03.25.06

 

[Bourne]

Monday 4.24.2006

FR: Approach #23 Starbucks (3 pm)
Starbucks. I am always on the lookout for these places where a lonely girl sitting by herself studying, drinking coffee, waiting to be approached. As I am standing in line this very good looking HB8 gets behind me. She is wearing this dress and business suit. She is looking very professional like she is in real estate or something.

I look back and she smiles, I smile and say hi.

I turn back around. Ok, come on Bourne I tell myself. Got to do this. It is a MUST.

Me: What do you do? You are all dressed up.
HB8: I sell wine and beer.
Me: Oh yeah, that sounds rather interesting. Do you have to have license for that?
HB8: Yeah you do.
Me: Interesting, I bet its expansive and hard to get.
HB8: Well sort of…

It was my turn to order. I order my drink and she goes after me. As I get my drinks I tell myself to talk to her for a little while but my goddamn intimidation of her got a better of me. I chocked. She sat down and as I looked at her she looked back and smiled. I completely chocked and grabbed my coffees and left. I initiated a conversation and would have talked but it was my turn. I am having some success talking to people in line but problem is its time based and conversation is very limited. It would have been fine if I grew the balls and walked over there and talked to her. Its ok, I learn and I live. Chocking is a part of a learning process.

FR: Approach #24 Bookstore (10 pm)
Very successful approach tonight. Success in inner world. I went to a Bookstore to study. I have a final in one of my classes tomorrow. For a good half hour nothing walked in, or out. Store was dead. I got a lot of things done. HB7 walks in with a guy. It looked like it could have been her brother, but it was her boyfriend. I made sure I had strong eye contact with her and I did. She walked off with her boyfriend. Few minutes later she alone comes back to around books where I was sitting at. I don’t think she did that on purpose but my gut feeling told me she did that subconsciously. All of a sudden I saw a chance to go to talk to her. Here we go guys.

I started to feel really nervous. My heart starting to beat 1000 times per second. The kind of heartbeat that you can feel through out your whole body and it is so loud that you think everyone can her. I know, that you know what I’m talking about. I had thousands of voices telling me to NOT do it.

I knew I had to do this, but my comfort zone Bourne was talking me out of it. This was going to be my only chance. I got up and as I started to approach her I walked into another aisle. Nervous as hell. I grew a pair and walked into her aisle.

Me: Hi, what is your name?

HB7 got very surprised that I was talking to her.

HB7: HB7
Me: I wanted to come over say hi and talk to you, you seem like a very cool girl.
HB7: Thank you (blushing)
Me: Is that guy your brother that you are with.
HB7: No, … that is my boyfriend.

Me knowing that was her boyfriend, but I played it off like it was her brother. I didn’t want to say was that your boyfriend. I wanted to put doubt in her mind that her b/f could be perceived by a stranger as her brother.

Me: Do you go to school HB7?
HB7: Yeah, I am Junior.
Me: High School?
HB7: Yeah.

FVCK. Dude, I can’t tell how old they are. She had piercing, tattoo. Looked older then she was.

Me: Well it was nice to meet you.

I left. I sat back down, feeling good because I overcame my nervousness and talked. Few minutes later she comes over to me.

HB7: Hey, I have a question. Do you recommend any books to me?

As she is asking she looks nervous and starts to look around for her boyfriend. But it is clear that she wants to talk to me. So we talk about my recommendations about what she should read. About what she reads and what are her plans after school. I recommend a book and she gets it. She thanks me and leaves. Her boyfriend comes around. This is all very funny to me now. As I sit there studying, she pays for her stuff and as she is about to leave she walks by me and says bye in a low tone voice with her boyfriend waiting for her at the door. If she only was 18.


Cold Approach: (24/100) since 03.25.06

 

[Bourne]

Wednesday 4.26.2006

Wednesday 4.26.2006

Slowly the line between approaching and feeling anxiety, what to say, etc is becoming blurry. I have lots and lots of way to go, but the improvement I have got so far is exponential. I want to say to everyone who reads my thread. I have come along way from that day in mid March where I broke up with my g/f. Before that I was in relationships for 6.5 years. 2 Girls. 2 sex partners my whole life. My life needed to change or death in regret would have been certain. I have taken the necessary first steps to live my life how I want.

I have gotten more friends. I have gotten people calling me wanting to hang out with me. Confidence has gone up. There has been so many positive things happening in my life in past month it has been extrodinary. I am still fighting from day to day with my fears, with my old limiting self. It has been painful. But if you want to change your life you have to start now. Not tomorrow, not a week from now. This very second. I have, and I know that if I did it, you have no excuse not to do the same and get yourself on the path.

FR: Approach #25 Beach (2 pm)
Went to the beach with a good friend of mine. After a while sitting there talking, bs I saw a cute hottie HB9. Actually my friend pointed her out to me. I sat there contemplating if I should go or not. Well I told my friend, there is only one way to find out. I stood up and started to walk over to her. She was very good looking, smoking body, reading a book. There you go I told myself, I can start with a book opener or something.

Me: Hi, I’m Bourne.

Pleasantly surprised.

HB9: HB9

We shook hands. I sat right down next to her.

Me: What are you reading?
HB9: Author name book.
Me: I haven’t read anything by him. I’ve seen movies.
HB9: Yeah, his movies aren’t that good.
Me: Yeah, with exception of Jurassic Park. Congo sucked.
HB9: Yeah
Me: What else do you read?

The convo went to other topic of books.
Then I took the convo into what she does for a living and where she was from and how she liked here. She started asking me questions about me, school, what I do for fun etc.

Nice conversation lasted for about 10 minutes. As it was getting to a close.

Me: Would you like to get drinks sometime?
HB9: Yeah, let me get your number.

I tell her my number. I didn’t like the fact that she has my number so now she has the control of to call or not. But I don’t really care if it happens or not, it was one of my best approaches yet.

HB9: I’ll give you a call, me and my friends will take you out.

She was hot, good body and she had her career going. Which tells me she was in her mid 20.

Cold Approach: (25/100) since 03.25.06

 

[Eggchen]

Bourne this is one of the most crazy transitions I have ever seen on these forums and it has happened so bloody fast! A HB9 asked YOU for YOUR number!! Well done on that approach, just simply saying "Hi I'm Bourne" and sitting down next to her showed that you're confident and not intimidated by her looks.

Don't worry about her having your number instead of the other way around. It's nice to have a girl chase you for once! I hope she keeps her word and gives you a call to go out and meet her friends - and this would give rise to yet another social circle for you! :cheer:

Keep up the great work Bourne - it's a bloody privelidge to read your updates!

 

[Blackdragon5095]

I'm have to disagree with that. If a girl gets your number most likely she won't call because she problay used that line on other guys. It's better if bourne gets her number so he has the ball in his court. If she gets the number then bourne will worry about her calling him. If he gets her number then she will be the 1 worrying and thinking. I said it's better to get the chick's number and set up a time to meet and hang up.

The phone number game is trickly because women will play all kinds of mind games on you. Look at how she could be thinking.

Me: Would you like to get drinks sometime?
HB9: Yeah, let me get your number. ( Yeah another afc )
HB9: I’ll give you a call, me and my friends will take you out. ( I use this line on all the time. Works like wonders )

Anyway you live as you learn.

 

[br1096]

That can go either way, depending on the level of attraction she felt or what stage she is in in her life. Just let us know if she calls. You should have busted balls when she asked you for your number.
"why dont you give me yours, you might be one of those phyco chics"
or
"Ok but your not one of those flaky girls who asks for numbers and never calls are you"

When she said she would take you out you should have asked where her and her friends usually hang out, then tell her you go there all the time, even if you havn't, and that you are surprised that you two have never met there before. You could have then transitioned to other popular bars, remeber common intrests builds attraction.

Good luck dude and keep the two combacks in your arsonal for chicks who ask for your number. As you progress more and more girls will ask you for your number so BE READY. Go get em this weekend! And keep the posts coming.

BR

 

[Bourne]

Monday 5.1.2006

Monday 5.1.2006

Thanks guys. I definetly should have teased her and used more humor about me giving my phone number to her. I did get a weird text messege on saturday saying "Hey Bourne ... save this number and call me when you want to check out the nightlife". That might be her, or might be some telemarketer. I'll call on friday.

This past weekend was great. Got to hang out with many friends. Go to parties and really, truly enjoy myself. Monday is last day of school for me. I'm done.

FR: Approach #26 Bookstore (2 pm)

I was nervous through out this whole encounter and it showed in my speech pattern and awkward silence. But the fact is that I did approach is huge for me.

I really need to step up my game up a few notches. Any tips on that?

Bookstore once again. As you can see I go there a lot. To study, check out books and magazines and to use that as an opportunity to talk to girls. Today was my last day in school. I’m off for the summer. I am in progress of making up summer goal list. I am going to be a better, great man by the time this summer is over. So to speak this will be the SUMMER OF BOURNE!

Not so successful approach but a learning one. HB6 standing by the gift section. I go over where she is and I look at some other stuff near her. I pick up a book where it talks about your birth day and describes your personality. I read mine and its ofcourse its full of sh1t. I look at her.

Me: When is your birthday?

HB6 looks puzzled.

Me: This books talks about your personality and describes you based on the day you were born. When is your birthday?
HB6: March27.

I read her the 2 sentences about her.

Me: So, does that describe you?
HB6: Sort of yeah.
Me: See, I read mine and its not me at all. Its says I’m judgemental – nope, and impatient – nope. So you shopping for a gift for someone?
HB6: Yeah, my sister its her birthday.
Me: How old is she?
HB6: 27
Me: What about you?
HB6: 20
Me: You go to school?

So we started to talk about school. I related to her because I went to same community college as she did. Then we talked about her major. I mentioned where I go. My school is very respected so me mentioning my school she was impressed. Problem? I was qualifying myself to her through the conversation. I am not sure why. Not good. She wasn’t really interested in the beginning. I thought to myself about asking for number but the whole encounter was empty. I didn’t lead, nor create interest in conversation. It was dry. I said nice to meet her and left.

Being able to step back and analyzine this approach or others as well is really helping me.

Improve on:

• Do not qualify myself
• Be more humorous, fun. NOT SERIOUS.
• Kino.
• Assume attraction.
• Relate to her like she is an old friend. Talk to her that way.

I’m definitely doing better, now I have to really step it up a notch.

Cold Approach: (26/100) since 03.25.06

 

[resilient]

escalate kino on a high point

Sarging with Wings
Do you have an local PUAs/DJs or strong wings that are studying in the community that could help you a little in person? You're developing strong in your interactions in solo sarging, but I think your skills would leap if you see other successful DJs in action.

I used to be shy in my interactions, but since I started sarging heavy in the field with PUAs that have taken Mystery, RSD, Pickup101 workshops, etc. they have been cool to give me some tips on body language, tonality, and openers.

Body language
One of the strangest things I'm finding with my interactons with people for me at least it's coming down to HOW and WHEN I say/do something not WHAT I say completely that builds attraction. What's your body language like in these approaches? Do you put down some light kino upon an approach to show you're a friendly person? You can pick up IOIs and can drop SOIs if you're interested in her.

Eliciting Value
You're definately improving strong in rapport with creative openers, but let her know your sexually interested via kino escalation as well. Once she has demonstrated value reward her with a SOI (statement of interest) or kino. Don't escalate without her having showing interest first, this is fool's gold and she won't understand when you try to #close or isolate her.

Isolate/mini-date
Also, if you get better at comfort building, you're next stage would be isolate her. IE: "Hey, I really like that, let's go sit down one theses couches over here and talk some more." or "Hey what are you doing right now? Let's get a bite to eat next door" etc. This really helps you in favor of eliminating flake defense that could come up later when you do phone game. HBs are looking for a man to commit or escalate and will willingly do so if you escalate just make sure you've given her a chance to invest interest in you before escalating.

 

[Bourne]

Summer Of Bourne Goals/Plans – 13 Weeks

SUMMER OF BOURNE GOALS/PLANS – 13 WEEKS

• Work on becoming the best self. Improve my life in all aspects. Become the prize. Health/Fitness; Relationships/Friendships; Financial; Goals/Ideals; Self-Knowledge/Awareness; Personal Fulfillment
• Travel to 2 new states I haven’t been to yet.
• Get a better/new job. 2 part time jobs that will make as 1 full time. Plus a freelancing gig.
• Approach nonstop. Complete 100 approaches. That is at least 1 girl per day.
• Clean my room. It’s a fvcking mess
• Clean my car. It’s a fvcking mess part 2.
• Save money. At least $800
• Workout and stay in tip-top shape
• Eat Healthy
• Read 8 books of my choice. Ranging from art, fiction to self help and seduction as well as human behavior.
• Study Italian
• Live everyday to its fullest
• Conquer a fear everyday. Do something everyday that scares me, something that challenges me.
• Get rid of my ego. Inferiority and Superiority complex. It’s more Inferiority.
• Have One-Night-Stand
• Have a summer fling
• Kiss close
• Get a BJ
• Get laid by at least 2 girls
• Weigh in at 150 lbs. I’m 142 right now.
• Study a 3d program. 3dsmax or maya.
• Draw. Draw. Draw.
• Take Dance Lessons
• Don’t do anything that makes me unhappy. Do not put up with sh1t. Some people tell me I should bare through a crappy job, a sh1t boss just because its there and you are making money. I say fvck that. There is no reason anyone should do what they do not want to. Fight that.
• Complete BootCamp.

I'll update and add to it as time goes on.

 

[Bourne]

Tuesday 5.2.2006

Tuesday 5.2.2006

Thanks resilient. That was very helpful.

I am now realizing that I need slowly to start transitioning to building better rapport and conveying more interest, sexuality and do less of neutral states.

My convesation skills are improving alot. Before I was searching on the forums and thinking in my head of what the hell do I say. Now it comes without thinking. I still do need improvement in that area but it became alot easier.

Today was rather good in stranger conversation approach. I chatted up 2 strangers and got their opinion on a CD I was buying. I asked one guy in the same section if he listens to techno a lot and we talked about music for a while.

At work I chatted up a cutie girl who came in. It wasn’t an approach but I lead the conversation and had a good one actually.

FR: Approach #27 Starbucks (5 pm)
Stopping off at starbucks after work. I see a HB4-5. Low end of the scale but its practice nonetheless. A starbucks hat is sitting right next to her.

Me: Starbucks employee I see.
HB4-5: Yeah.
Me: Do you get free coffee?
HB4-5: I think so.
Me: Ah, you are training?
HB4-5: Yeah.

They I turn around and don’t pay any attention to her. Few seconds later.

HB4-5: Are you a regular here?
Me: Here? No, I usually go up the road to another one. But Ilike this one better. You guys have a nice outside patio area. The other one is almost right on the road.
HB4-5: Oh yeah, that is true. This one is much nicer.
Me: So today is your first day working?
HB4-5: Yes it is.

My drink was up.

Me: Good luck to you. What is your name?

As I reach out my hand to touch hers

HB4-5: HB4-5
Me: I’m Bourne.
HB4-5: Nice to meet you.
Me: You too.

Cold Approach: (27/100) since 03.25.06