A Mature, Married Man's Fileld Report!

[Rollo Tomassi]

Women don't want a man to cheat, but the love a man who could cheat.

 

[zekko]

Like a lot of rules of game and seduction, one should adjust and temper behavior depending on the stage of the relationship and the person's disposition.

Flirting in front of "your" woman in the early stages is great game and works wonders.

I would agree with that.

Rollo's point is that the game is never over. And while I agree with that, I think the mark of a good relationship (well, for me, anyway) is that the amount of "head games" being played by both people can be kept to a minimum. If I thought it was necessary to play games forever to keep a LTR going, I probably wouldn't bother being in one. Drawing a thin line between "game" and "game playing" there.

In a marriage or LTR, there's a certain measure of respect you should afford your mate. If your frame is sound, it's implicit that you as a man can have your pick of any number of ladies, but chose her. She knows this, and enjoys it; there is no need to flaunt it in an egregious fashion. Each couple of course has their own comfort level and idea of what's harmless and what's acceptable.

I would agree with that.

Maybe if we substituted "flirt" with "charm," it wouldn't seem so egregious or questionable. One should always be charming....

Good suggestion.

 

[Nutz]

Women don't want a man to cheat, but the love a man who could cheat.

This tracks to the ol' Prince Charming theory--women LOVE being selected over other women, so it's required he have options to be selected over them.

http://funandsocial.blogspot.com/2008/07/prince-charming-theory.html

 

[iqqi]

I must say, +1 for 5string here. I find his behavior to be mature and real "dhv", not contrived "dhv" that involves disrespect to his own morals and values, let alone his wife.

A great example of a natural's mindset.

 

[Slickster]

IMO, that's not a bad thing. I would venture to say that one of the worst things you could do in a marriage is to go out of your way to reassure your spouse that you would never cheat.

Very true but...

Always an awkward situation with your LTR.

Her: Would you cheat on me?
You: Ummm......

Seriously though this question gets asked and you can really only answer it one way.

Also flirting with other women in front of your LTR may not always be appropriate in certain situations.

There are however a lot of ways to make your girl jealous indirectly. It can be as simple as a little extra grooming before you head out for the night without her. Paying attention to the details of how you dress and look. Staying as fit as you can. Working out at home.

Socially I find it advantageous to befriend the women that you see working at different places you frequent around town. So that one day you'll be on the street with your girl and run into the hot deli store girl you've been chatting with. A quick little conversation with a strange woman can really help your cause.

 

[5string]

I must say, +1 for 5string here. I find his behavior to be mature and real "dhv", not contrived "dhv" that involves disrespect to his own morals and values, let alone his wife.

A great example of a natural's mindset.

Thank you.

 

[Knight's Cross]

Slickster posted about when they ask if you'd cheat on them.
Whenever I've had a woman pose that question I just look at them with a furled brow and change the subject. I "NEVER" answer that question. I just give them a bemused grin and change topic. Let the hamster cage spin on that.
KC