I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Well, I did pull her in when we said good bye and tongued her for a good 5 seconds...so I don't think..."I was too nice".donjuanapprentice01 said:I ALWYS get that, lol
"wow, why don't you have a girlfriend?"
Next time I get told that I will say "hmmm... good question. Tell you what, why don't you be my gf?" see the response you will get.
The scary thing is, one can be coming across as too nice without realizing it. However, I do not think I did at all. I told her she looked nice, but that is the only compliment I gave her.mattb717 said:I got the same thing a couple fo weeks ago when a female friend of mine was *****ing about what pansy her boyfriend is. I matter-of-factly pointed out he is probably the type to throw out entirely too many compliments to her and it makes her uncomfortable. I also said he probably thinks telling her she is hot all the time makes her feel good when it probably makes her feel more liuke a slut. Instead he should tell her she is beautiful. Her and another female friend stared wide-eyed at me and simply said "How do you not a have a girlfriend?"