"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Your Thoughts...
- Thread starter pLaYtHiNg
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
There isn't enough attraction in both sides or him being overtly timid and you being overtly aggressive that could make this work.
pLaYtHiNg said:
This is the rationalization of a woman who hasn't had a good d1ck stuffed into her for quite sometimes. It shows that you are lowering your standards to be with this guy because it seems like it has been a while for you and you are ready to kick start your dating life. If a better prospect comes along pLaYtHiNg, you will kick this guy so fast out of your life he wouldn't know what has hit him.
pLaYtHiNg said:
You weren't looking for polite and gentlemanly, you were looking for "I am going to tear your cloths off and have my way with you b1tch" but once again you are rationalizing that he didn't fvck you because of him being "polite or gentlemanly" (even though in the back of your head you knew exactly what suppose to have happen when a girl comes over to a guy's apartment late at night).
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Well, yes that whole intimacy thing hasn't happened in quite awhile, (my choice, of course), but as far as kind of implying that it is the reason I am feeling attracted to this guy leaves me wondering why I'm not feeling this way in the presence of any other men I interact with... Some of them quite attractive, actually... (?)DJDamage said:
I didn't assume he was a virgin, I just observed that it may be a possibility.pua1989 said:
So yes, we hung out, ran some errands, ate lunch (I paid) and did some shopping. He did briefly mention that something I did reminded him of a girl he 'used to see'. I also took the opportunity to point out some attractive guys and asked him what he thought... gave the typical male responses.. "I don't check out dudes" etc.
So, that looks like a negative on the gay, haven't gotten the gall to ask about sex yet.
I asked if he had kids, (somehow the topic came up) and he said no... sooo... Horaholic... we went shopping today. All he did was look at jackets and some clothes. He seems to have this weird thing where he always wants to see how I look in WinBreakers... LOL Kinda strange, but I'm not one to judge.
Saber... I'd love to send him a link... LOL but I would be embarrassed when he saw this thread... LOL
He has been steadily increasing the KINO... rubbing my shoulders, touching my face, just a lot of touchy feely-ness. I haven't really been reciprocating, but also not acting too uncomfortable with it... it makes me feel sort of awkward, but I try not to show it because I'm sure it's just because it's been a long time since anyone has really touched me. I'm warming up to it
So we'll see what happens... Interceptor
Master Don Juan
Im wondering if youre just hiding the fact that you just may be really really lonely. And thats ok. Theres nothing inherently wrong or weak about that.
Its part of the human condition.
But if youre not into this guy, not reciprocating, then youre leading him on.
Because he thinks youre into him and he thinks theres something going on between you two other than friendship.
If theres no sexual escalation at this point, then there is only a friend situation here Im afraid.
And by you staying with him in this capacity means your encouraging this dynamic and being misrepresentative of your true feelings and intentions.
Perhaps youre simply too afraid to BE in an intimate romantic relationship again, but you cant control your NEEDS.
So this is a sort of undercover way of getting some of your needs met perhaps?
Anyway, just some quick observations.
Good luck.
edger
Master Don Juan
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*Ears go up like a dog who hears the words, "you wanna eat?"* Gotta chime in here...what about these good-looking guys whom you describe as "quite attractive", doesn't do it for you? I'll assume like anyone else, that their charm and game isn't as up to par as this skinny, short, ugly guy. But seriously think about it for a second. What does this guy who you're currently "seeing", who's not as good-looking as these other guys, have over these other guys that makes you attracted to him and not the others?pLaYtHiNg said: