Your reaction to indifference?

[European-DJ]

I wanted to hear some opinions about indifference, and how you guys react to it?

It's preached on sosuave that indifference is a great "tool" when dealing with women; and I must admit, that the girls that I "cared" the least about, where the ones most hooked.

But does it work when it is the other way around? When a girl, that you've had sex with, is indifferent to you?

When looking back, the girls I was the most "obsessed" with, were the ones that didn't really care, didn't catch feelings, and the ones I had the most trouble reading.

I would really like to hear some opinions, and personal experiences with indifference being used upon you - and how you dealt with it.

/European

 

[Desdinova]

I learned the hard way many years ago, and I think I've been 'in the know' far too long and automatically drop a woman who's indifferent to me. If everything I've done doesn't work, then there's no hope in hell in making her attracted to me. I wipe her from my mind and move on.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

She might be a player, just like you.

 

[Serenity]

Back in the day it drove me crazy, it was my own mind dealing with the tension of not knowing and the desire of a particular girl. Does she like me or not? I like her, how do I find out if she likes me? Maybe she likes me, but is too shy to say or show it. I felt high, I was high on infatuation. In reality they just didn't feel the way I felt, since I was so high I fell hard upon that realization.

Now I take indifference for what it is and move on. If it's a tactic on their part to "hook" me doesn't matter, if that's the case they played games and as such lost. I don't play that game, if I'm interested I show it and if it's not returned I don't keep entertaining them.

If a woman acts interested in me and later becomes indifferent I leave her, I don't waste my time on people who doesn't give a sh!t. If they turn sharply on and off I leave, I call that unstable. I will give them all affection in the world on one condition, that they give me theirs.

Simply put I don't react to lack of reaction, I'm just indifferent and go care about people who cares. I have plenty of people who cares so walking away ain't hard, I think that fact is why some women come back chasing. At some level they know people care about me which is why it's so easy for me to be indifferent, so what do I have to offer those people that she's missing out on? What's so great about me since so many people care? She might wonder about that. The truth on my part is that I care back, they have something I value so I give them something they value.

Think there's a restaurant A where the staff treated you very well and went a long way ensuring you have a good experience. Then there's restaurant B that just didn't give sh!t and did the minimum they had to do and perhaps even spit in your food, no service, just putting some bad meal on your table and took your money. Would you pay more and return several times to restaurant B in they hope they started caring about you? I bet nobody would. However at restaurant A people willingly return and sometimes willingly pay more than they have to because they deserve more than they ask for. Caring about an indifferent woman is like returning to and paying more to restaurant B, men who do this wrongfully assume they will act like some of the customers on restaurant A in recognition of the service received. I personally have no problem returning and even paying more than I have to if a woman is like restaurant A, chances are I'll probably be restaurant A to her as well.

I think this adequately illustrates how I deal with it.

 

[handle]

I realized a few years back that some girls seem indifferent when in reality THEY feel nervous and awkward. So, now I am not so quick to NEXT if they are genuinely interesting to me.

 

[Casillas]

It doesn't matter if you're a guy or a girl, when someone ignores you it became a challenge and that's the moment when you get stuck.

 

[European-DJ]

Thank you for the perspective guys, I appreciate you taking the time to write it up.

The below post seems to sum up what the general definition of "indifference" is.

It doesn't matter if you're a guy or a girl, when someone ignores you it became a challenge and that's the moment when you get stuck.

However, I must disagree. Indifference =/= ignoring. Indifference is purely not needing the other party, and not caring about whether they are present or not.

The girl that got me into this train of thoughts is not ignoring me; she is just not contacting me as often as i would like/answering me at the pace I want her to.
- With that being said, I have slept with her twice this week.

However her indifference; her lack of "neediness" is what makes me feel "attached" and is the reason I get stuck.

I believe these are the feelings girls usually have after having sex with me, and i turn indifferent - Karma?

The interesting part is, as soon as a girl is indifferent to whether I am around or not, I get hooked right away, and I start “obsessing” about her.
- I am not sure how to interpret this, but i am wondering if it could be a sign of bad self esteem/desperation/neediness from my side...

Any opinions?

 

[ubercat]

I had the odd experience of counseling a natural on this today. My mate is keen on 1plate and got 2 more. Naturally aloof and alpha guy. This girl went NC on him. Advised him to spin his other plates and leave it minimum 3 days then drop 1 liner text
Prob is even the toughest of us r still hoping to find our unicorn.

 

[Infern0]

Well you have to differentiate if she's playing games or if she's just independent etc.

If its "AW" indifference in which she's attempting to string you along then next. But if shes like a career woman who is just wanting some company and sex from time to time then it's all good. If you want more and she can't give it just look elsewhere, although if your game is tight she'll probably change her stance.

Overall it's better than some self esteem overly attatched chick making your life hell until you have to block

 

[nismo-4]

Male indifference only works if the girl is interested.

Blowing hot and cold with indifference from a female = NEXT.

My biggest issue is women getting interested in me and they stop responding. But they respond when I let them know I NEXTed them! Happened Friday.

Actions over words fellas.

And when indifference meets indifference before sex, stalemate. You're not giving attention, so delete her from all platforms. Also, before sex, all indifference is AW indifference until proven otherwise.

If the opposite of love ia indeed indifference, we just need to NEXT these such women because they don't deserve attention and love.

Case closed.