Your opinion/advice

[Dole]

This girl older then me by 4 or 5 years. Known her for a quite some time. I am certain she like's me, but I didn't talk to her for a while. ran into her at the club shes like wheres my hug this and that she held my hand and stuff while we where talking blah blah, I txt her that night saying I hope she got home safe and that she looked really good. She also told me she was looking for a job at the club as a hostess.I told her that I could help her out get one at some restaurant that's pretty good on making money. So I went in talk to the managment because I know them they said get her to come in and we will go from there. I meet up with her that day we went for her interview she gets the job on the spot, we grab some food after the interview it went all well she was showing signs of interests, she kept staring at me the whole time and I tryed not looking at her and every time I did she was staring at me and she would look away if I catch her looking at me, she was flirting and telling me storys. She's like I will txt u tomorrow but doesn't txts me 2 days later after that ( its a saturday ) shes like hey what u doing, r u going out tonight? Instead of txting I call her asked her what her plan was that night. She said shes going out for sushi and then after that she doesn't know what shes going to do, I suggested maybe a lounge or something but she said she dazzed out and that she's feeling anti social. So I told her I will call her back in a few minutes i will make a few phone calls to see what my friends are doing and I will call her back. I called her back told her we can do something some other night because I was kinda busy and that she cant make up her mind. So we arranged something on monday to go for dinner, I told her I will call her monday during the day. I called her twice and doesn't pick up.


Last night she sent me a message on facebook:
"hi babe! sooooooooooooooo sorry about yesterday!!! some drama went down and had to dealt with.please don't be mad at me. i have orientation tomorrow at 9 but what do you think about making up for our missed dinner this weekend? let me know. xo"

Whats the best thing to say and the best way to handle this?

 

[Bible_Belt]

She means she has another guy.

I'd reply:

haha, no worries. You are not the only one with a little drama. I'd love to see you this weekend, but I can't make plans just yet. I'll call you later this week after I know when I'm available.


Then don't mention what the drama is. Talk about hers first, then allude to yours being similar, then just never tell her. The drama thing is a hook to pique her interest. It implies that you have other girls, which is the hook. Straight-up telling her you have other girls is not nearly as effective; this way grabs her curiosity and makes her think and wonder about you.

 

[DavenJuan]

well its not more important WHAT you say rather than HOW you feel about this.

are you okay with her not answering your 2 calls?

are you okay with her not having the decency to call prior and cancel the plans?

are you okay with her responding by facebook and not call or even text?

those are the few things that i processed. if they DONT bother you then tell her no biggie. next time let you know so you can make other plans

if it DOES bother you. then i would explain to her that you time is very important and she needs to make this up to you.

 

[Dole]

If I brought up that my time is very important she would think its a joke because I go to university with her and were both on winter break right now and I am no business man nor am I employed currently so my time is not very important.
But I like what you said DavenJuan and I do know this girl like's when a guy stands up to her and tells her what to do and bosses her around. I was sitting next to her at school while she was talking to some other girl and they were talking about guys and what they like.She told the other girl the following: I am very bossy and I always want it my way but I don't need a guy that follow's me around and listens to me and that I am in charge of the relationship. Thats when she turned around and slapped me on my knee and she's like I hope you where listening to what we where talking about. DavenJuan i am considering your approach towards this...

 

[Dole]

my reply:
You ignored two of my calls, you did not have with the decency to call prior and cancel the plans, and you message me on facebook
instead of calling me back or txting. Also I invited you over for lunch on christmas and you stayed up all night knowing that you have a lunch
to attend the following day. Clearly I am wasting my time trying to hang out with you, seems like you can't deliver your end of the bargain.
You have some making up to do if not see you around.


any input on what I should change?

 

[DavenJuan]

yes....you need to change a few things

first and foremost... your time IS IMPORTANT.

just because you go to the same university or she knows you dont work means nothing

your time is important to YOU. even if that time is sitting at home and posting on sosuave or watching t.v. it doesnt really matter what your doing.

the first thing you need to change IMO is your thought process. you are putting effort into convincing her that you are busy rather than knowing that you are .

YOU are the prize and she is lucky to spend ANY time with you. if she cant appreciate this then the next girl will