"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Younger chick advice needed....

Ben15

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Alright guys here's the lowdown: She is 18 Im 22

- Met a girl (HB9) through my cousin at his B-day party, a group of us went to the movies. First time that I met her. I was cracking jokes and had everyone laughing. Tried not to just single her out flirted with all the chicks. Must say it went well and we seemed to hit it off very well not bad for a first encounter. This was in January.

- Fast forward to July, saw her at my cousins grad party. There were a ton of people there but she spotted me from a distance as she was leaving (she just dropped by real quick) and gave me a wave and a big smile. I returned the favor and just left it at that, I was surprised she even remembered me.

- Here's were it gets interesting: she is a singer and I was asked through a mutual friend to plays drums for her for a show. Of course I agreed as I saw this as a golden opportunity. One other dudes in the band hit on her constantly, I kinda let him do his thing and crash and burn on his own lol. Anyway, me her pretty much have been meeting up for about week to practice and hang and really seem to get along great and have chemistry. Two days before the show it was just me and her and you could feel the nervous energy from her and I admit I was alittle nervous as well, but I stayed cool and things went fine. Fast forward to the day of the show and we spent about 4hrs together just me and her, getting food before the show and just talking and warming up. We talked about everything and anything, and I through in some kino throughout the whole time and she responded with a smile and was really giddy.

- Show went great and my cousin was talking to her on the phone (there best friends) and she heard me in the background I guess and was like "Is that your cousin!? Tell him he did great and that I said Hi"! We text sometimes about random ****, she is just cool and laid back, no drama.

- My problem is that she is leaving for college in like a week and Im not sure what to do. I mean I have only known her pretty much this week. Also, she is best friends with my cousin which could be a little awkward but I don't really care. So do you guys think I should just man up and ask her out before she leaves? And do you think I have any advantage/disadvantage being older? Thanks guys I appreciate it!
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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doctorj

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girls love older guys

we're in a similar situation regarding the age gaps...but the plate I want to spin turns 19 tomorrow...haha
 

King Turi

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How is 18-22 an age gap?

An age gap is more like 18-30 or something, like a generation gap.

Since this chicks leavin', man up and tell her come out and down some drinks with you at XXX on XXX night.
Don't "ask her out" though.
 
E

Energizer

Guest
The age gap is hardly noticeable and the chances are you a 22 year old man isn't going to be anymore mature or well rounded than an 18 year old girl.

You have a case of oneitis here. I advise you do not ask her out and you do not get into a part time relationship (sorry a long distance relationship).

What I do advise you do is to flirt with her, seduce her, lure her into your bed or hers and enjoy yourself before she leaves.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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scrouds

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Energizer said:
I thought that obvious?

He is overdramatizing the situation.

I don't take anything for granted. Obvious is only for those who know and can see this. What is obvious to you and me may be earth shattering to him.

I can just see it, running through his head.... "All I have to do is kiss her? That's it? What, don't we have to go to dinner first? I mean I know some guys can do that sort of thing, but this is me. I need to know how to get her..."
 

Ben15

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No I didn't wanna kiss her or anything before the show, it would have just made things awkward. She is a super good girl, doesn't drink, very religious, etc...Im thinking of just seeing if she wants to hang out, and take it from there, hopefully to the bedroom haha. Thanks for the help, she is just different from other chicks I have dated so I needed a little push and some help. Thanks!
 
E

Energizer

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scrouds said:
I don't take anything for granted. Obvious is only for those who know and can see this. What is obvious to you and me may be earth shattering to him.

I can just see it, running through his head.... "All I have to do is kiss her? That's it? What, don't we have to go to dinner first? I mean I know some guys can do that sort of thing, but this is me. I need to know how to get her..."
I used to be like this; in fact it wasn't that long ago either and then I tried my luck and my luck was in and I reaped the rewards of what was sewn and so I thought to myself, if it works with one woman, it is bound to work with another and the second came and the third and suddenly like a pornstar on the end of my co*k this afc behaviour vanished and my inner man was set free.
 

Ben15

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Alright so we have plans to work on some music together, just me and her. If everything goes right Im hoping to get the kiss and maybe more...we shall see. I understand what you guys are saying, but this girl was different to me and I know I probably overthought the hell out of this. So Im gonna man up and go for it. TY
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Kevin Feng

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Girls love older guys, as far as that goes, it’s going to do nothing but help you. Use that to your advantage.

Know that she’s perceives you as an older guy, ergo you’re more experienced and I guess knows more than she does. Act that way, it will help you establish that dominant frame with her.

Anyways, YES you should ask her out, no question about it, you’ll lose nothing by asking her out, remember, you’ll miss 100% of shots you don’t take.

She’s already into you, play the dominant frame and go for the kill, something to give you further insight:

http://theasianplayboy.blogspot.com/2006/03/eight-key-concepts-for-successful-date.html
 
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