"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

yo, some advice needed...

hopeful loner

Don Juan
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First of, let's just say that I am a rAFC. The issue is, I've been a recovering rAFC for some 1.5 years now...

From an intellectual perspective I am fully aware of the dynamics of male/female relationships but I have not lived it enough. I've internalized this stuff only to the extent that I became a bit more outgoing around last october, landed a girlfriend, went with her several months (no sex) only for it to fizzle away without me carring.

At any rate, what I'm asking for is a plan of some sort to get me more out into the field...

Any advice for someone who's totally virginal and deathly afraid of cold approaches and such stuff?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Docs

Banned
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I frequent a Tim Hortons. This particular girl there has seen me before (I make multiple trips per day), so since she's seen me around, and I am such a nice guy and ran off 9 coffees at the drive thru, she gave me a card to call in advance, and I decided to ask her her name.

That's really all you need to know, is to take your current situation and advance it. I could keep going, never saying more then 'thank you', but since I went out and found out her name (it's phonetically spelt Tab-if-tha, I'll just call her Tabby :p), I can carry on conversations, the what's up, how's your day.

And I'm not a outgoing guy :)
 

WaRpEd

Senior Don Juan
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Hey friend,

Just about all you can do is get out there and do it. Trust me I know your situation man, i (and im sure many others fiddling around sosuave) have been in the same if not a similar situation.

If you allready have a basic understanding of the dynamics of relationships, and know of the techniques this site and others like it has to offer...then pretty much all you need now is experience.

So heres your plan:

Step 1: Possibly, if you need it, brush up on your technique a little by reading over a couple articles or browsing over the DJ Bible.

Step 2: Get ready, throw on some nice clothes.

Step 3: Take a deep breath.

Step 4: GO OUT! Get out in the field right now!

I understand how it is, being afraid of cold-approaches. Trust me I had to change my pants after every cold-approach. But I eventually got used to it, caught the hang of it, and eventually became good at it...but I had to FORCE myself to do it.

Like I said in another post earlier, "Smack yourself, grab your boys, remind yourself what you are, and go"

Peace be with you man, Warped
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

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