"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Yin Yan and BJS

Pajeet Singh

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2017
Messages
134
Reaction score
39
Age
34
So I recently read a great article about maintaining relationship. See the attachment. The author talk about Man is Yin (the active part) and women is Yan (the passive, responding one), specially in bedroom. So man has to be inserting and pushing and pulling and it happens most of the time. Then I was thinking what is this author's opinion about Bjs and he get to this as well. But he says its a Men being passing and women acting active act. So BJ is not a correct act of YinYan. And then he moves on to other stuff. I agree with this. But where does this put men who enjoy having BJS? Is it true Bjs ruin relationships, specially the bedroom relationship, because it acts in inverted way to YinYan?

Is hooker and obsessed gfs are only option for BJs then?

I am really a noob. 28 yo virgin. I want to know from mature members how does BJs play out in bedroom relationships and does it end up in better and stronger relationship or bad. Also can you please add if eat her out make the relationship better or worse?

Pls put disclaimer that you are speculating if you are not experienced.
 
Last edited:

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Serenity

Moderator
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
5,150
Reaction score
5,057
Age
35
Location
Eye of the storm
Is it true Bjs ruin relationships, specially the bedroom relationship, because it acts in inverted way to YinYan?
No, this author is talking out of his a$$.

Is hooker and obsessed gfs are only option for BJs then?
No.

I am really a noob. 28 yo virgin. I want to know from mature members how does BJs play out in bedroom relationships and does it end up in better and stronger relationship or bad. Also can you please add if eat her out make the relationship better or worse?
It makes it worse if she doesn't like it and you push her into doing it. It makes it better if she likes it. This goes for pretty much all types of sexual activity.

Pls put disclaimer that you are speculating if you are not experienced.
I am in a relationship that has lasted several years, we are regularly having oral sex and the relationship couldn't be better.
 

KindredSpiritzz

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 1, 2019
Messages
498
Reaction score
500
Age
60
Location
Wisconsin
I make it clear from the git go I need her to suck **** and swallow or she wont stay in my life long. If she doesn't like that she's gone.
 

Pajeet Singh

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2017
Messages
134
Reaction score
39
Age
34
I make it clear from the git go I need her to suck **** and swallow or she wont stay in my life long. If she doesn't like that she's gone.
Have you said that or this is just your projection of how u feel about yourself? If you said how did your partner react?
 

Hamurabimbi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2018
Messages
4,124
Reaction score
3,628
Location
California
Seems maybe irrelevent in my case. I've had girls give or not give. My current GF isn't into BJs. I don't really notice much difference in relationships. I don't eat Pv$$y either.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,783
Reaction score
9,998
But he says its a Men being passing and women acting active act. So BJ is not a correct act of YinYan.
That sounds like it makes sense. But I think it's a case of how something can sound logical on paper but actually be BS.
There's also a thought that receiving a BJ is a dominant act in that it's an act of servitude on the female's behalf. By the same token, if a woman cooks a meal, that's an active act, but no one would say that is against YinYan.
 
Top