"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Yet Another Attenshun Seeking Story

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moogster

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Well I got involved with this girl 6 months ago and took it real slow. But she wore me down gradually with all the techniques seen in the posts about bpd and hpd, as well as the attention seeking stuff. Man she was good but not good enough. She was a bit of a freeloader too. Anyway, I stupidly fell for her and then I began to see the red flags more clearly. Issued an ultimatum at christmas that if she didn't amend her behaviour, she'd have to leave.

Long story short, she borrowed some money off me to visit her mom, with whom she has a love/hate relationship. In fact, I think she was playing out that relationship through me as well. It began with all this clingy, needy sh*t then the distancing behaviour. I began to realise she has serious problems. On return she did the we'll be better as friends than a couple. Fine there's the door...

Thing is now she is emabarking on a smear campaign against me. Really nasty stuff and I did get angry for awhile. Trouble is this is still going on 2 months later. I tried being friendly with her (big mistake) now I'm avoiding her completely. She can really pull the wounded little girl stuff well. So guys I'm asking what would ya do in a situation like that? I mean how best to handle the lies and distortions....

Rgds,
moogster
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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resilient

resilient

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BPD are bad cases, but the healthiest thing you can do is wish her well, but don't answer her calls/emails.

Those head cases always need a shrink, not another bed buddy. It's a vicious cycle, just be glad you didn't get strung along further than when you realized it wasn't healthy.

She's after you now for attention and can guilt you into doing things with manipulation. Don't let her.

Best bet is to keep her distant and spin more plates.
 
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moogster

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gherald said:
what is BPD?
Click to expand...
BPD = Borderline Personality Disorder
HPD = Histrionic Personality Disorder

- women with these characteristics aren't worth the effort, they will drain you emotionally. You could do a search on this forum for more complete definitions. Basically, learn the signs/red flags and avoid at all costs. Trust me, been there done that.
 
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