Yesterday I was "approached" by this girl... They are as bad as 99% guys at this!

[Shivastorm_88]

I guess this can help you realize that when approaching, it isn't easier for one sex than for another, it's equally hard and awkward for 99% people of both sexes (yes I just made up a number, deal with it).

I go to this coffee shop often with friends (2x a week ish) and my friends have noticed that this (unattractive) waitress is into me by the way she talks to me (but no one else other than the polite cues), the way she looks at me and smiles at me. And once they told me, yeah it's pretty obvious hahah.

So yesterday I was paying (credit card) and then she hands me the terminal, and says one of the stupidest lines I have ever heard to spark a conversation:

"look, it asks for your language! I never noticed that before!" Which is complete and utter B.S. (I live in Quebec, bilingual province, especially in Montreal, the terminals almost always ask for the language, and the one at that coffee shop obviously does).

Honestly, I was completely taken off-guard by the stupidity of this comment that I didn't know what to say. I wanted to be polite and reply in a flirty way back, or at least play along with her comment, but it was so dumb and unexpected that I semi froze and answered something pretty dumb as well hahah. I just interchanged the typical role; I was approached, and in a really dumb way, and I couldn't figure what to reply for the life of me. And mind you, I am actually aware of the game, of the flirting "tactics" or whatever you want to call them, and I actively work on my game to always try to keep a flirty vibe in my exchanges.

Moral of the story? A few:

1) Girls are equally as bad as guys when it comes to approaching
2) Inversion of role: Think about this story when you approach a girl. If you do it in a really dumb way, chances are you will catch her off guard, she won't know how to react and this might not end like you hope.
3) In other words, props for approaching, it takes guts. However, if you do it, try not to sound like a complete idiot. That's actually a turn-off.

 

[ArcBound]

Girl in subway says "hey weren't you at that college party I was just in" although I clearly wasn't. Then a random conversation starts and exchange info.

It's good that a girl approached you. I think when a guy gets approached by a 7+ he must have some of his sh!t together at the very least and be decently good looking. Good stuff Shiva, next time capitalize

 

[Shivastorm_88]

Girl in subway says "hey weren't you at that college party I was just in" although I clearly wasn't. Then a random conversation starts and exchange info.

It's good that a girl approached you. I think when a guy gets approached by a 7+ he must have some of his sh!t together at the very least and be decently good looking. Good stuff Shiva, next time capitalize

Hahah, probably helped out that I was doing physics exercises (mechanics can be quite tedious -_-), makes me look smart

All jokes aside, I have been approached a few times here and there already, and now that I re-think about it, its true that usually I do a fairly bad follow-up job; I guess it's because I'm not in control from the start when it happens and I get caught off guard. I'll have to pay more attention to that!

 

[badboyjmm]

well usually the girls that approach me just say hi and keep walking. That's probably why there's nothing more than that, since I know lots of people, somebody just saying hi happens often. Or I'm just terrible at detecting interest

 

[Wildebeest]

well to be fair, they dont know how to approach because they dont do it often
I guess once they approach you, it still should revert to you being the initiator in the interaction