****y/Funny Personality gone?

[jlazz]

Over the summer I somehow developed the ****y/funny attitude and was really confident in myself...I'm actually suprised...I worked at a country club and when girls would approach the desk I always threw a few lines at them and was able to keep their interest. I even had one girl completely smiling in nervousness the next time she came up to order something. She was blushing...her friend said "sorry she's just a lil shy ;-)" in other words "she likes you".

It meant nothing to me though because I was full of myself and didn't give a **** about what people thought. I ended up getting a girlfriend because of this...I had her laughing all the time and she didn't know what was coming out of my mouth next. I was unpredictable.

But I lost it! Later in the relationship I lost that personality/attitude and started getting clingy.

Anyway, I'm single again and need to get it back. I'm a bit more insecure than I was before. What are some good reads that can put me in the ****y/funny full of myself, but not jerk mindset. It was reading stuff on here that got me into it, but it was some specific articles.

Most of all...I was funny and knew it. I've pretty much lost it. I don't see how I did, but now that I think about it I did. And before, I would say jokes w/ a serious face and now when I'm with friends I'm always the one cracking up and looking like an idiot. I was the guy telling jokes and having people cracking up and now I'm on the receiving end.

 

[AlexTheGreat]

I feel you man, I'm in the same boat right now ... it's like I've dropped the crown and someone else took it from me, and now I'm following instead of leading.

I'm bumping this, cuz I'm interested in what might come out

 

[phatboi408]

It always happen you get all this confidence but then it wears down.

 

[jlazz]

So how do I get it back? Should I reread the stuff that initially got me confident? It was reading articles in the DJ Bible and some other sites that changed my way of thinking...

 

[diablo]

Please read a section's description before posting in it!.

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In the future, please try to post in the right section.

Moved to DJD...

 

[monster squad]

I was similar to this.

I was always a natual arseh0le, but I held back. Then I found this place last spring, and decided to break down the dam and be myself. Girls threw themselves at me, and life was good. Got hooked on one, became cilingy, then emotional, then horrible to be around.

I'm only just NOW starting to come out of this. I don't think you can just force yourself out of a rut like that. It just takes time.

While you're waiting, you could try becoming a hermit (and do a lot of whatever interests you), and re-emerge when you're ready. Maybe you're just running on low and need a recharge.

 

[Magnatolia]

There was a technique I've read about. Haven't tried it personally so can't say how effective it is.


Go back in your mind to the time when you were confident and concentrate on how you feel. While doing this make some sort of body action (scratch ear, press on wrist) - something that's not publicly embarrassing. What this does is associates that action with those feelings. It might give you the boost you need.

Cheers

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by jlazz
Over the summer I somehow developed the ****y/funny attitude and was really confident in myself...I'm actually suprised...I worked at a country club and when girls would approach the desk I always threw a few lines at them and was able to keep their interest. I even had one girl completely smiling in nervousness the next time she came up to order something. She was blushing...her friend said "sorry she's just a lil shy ;-)" in other words "she likes you".

It meant nothing to me though because I was full of myself and didn't give a **** about what people thought. I ended up getting a girlfriend because of this...I had her laughing all the time and she didn't know what was coming out of my mouth next. I was unpredictable.

But I lost it! Later in the relationship I lost that personality/attitude and started getting clingy.

Anyway, I'm single again and need to get it back. I'm a bit more insecure than I was before. What are some good reads that can put me in the ****y/funny full of myself, but not jerk mindset. It was reading stuff on here that got me into it, but it was some specific articles.

Most of all...I was funny and knew it. I've pretty much lost it. I don't see how I did, but now that I think about it I did. And before, I would say jokes w/ a serious face and now when I'm with friends I'm always the one cracking up and looking like an idiot. I was the guy telling jokes and having people cracking up and now I'm on the receiving end.

Seasonal affective disorder?

I've been ten kinds of AFC the past couple months...haven't had much game at all. Haven't really had that much DESIRE for the 'tang.

Maybe you should give it a rest and focus on yourself and come back to it in a couple weeks.

It's great to WANT to be better with the women, it's very bad to NEED to be better with the women. I found I was happier when I didn't put so much emphasis on performance...just a desire to play the game well is enough.