WTF??? What's going on here?

[MRomeo99]

Ok Vincent explain to me exactly what this site is about then.

And tell me exactly why online introductions (a better term), is far worse than meeting at a bar, gym, or grocery store? Explain to me exactly how after meeting a girl for a "date", everything beyond hello is somehow sullied by the online interaction.

And explain to me how online introductions are counterproductive to everything YOU believe this site stands for?

You misunderstand Vincent. I don't want anything from you. I'm not trying to convince you to come to the "dark side". I just want some clarification of how I can best stays within your rules and guidelines.

 

[Vincent]

Originally posted by MRomeo99
Ok Vincent explain to me exactly what this site is about then.

And tell me exactly why online introductions (a better term), is far worse than meeting at a bar, gym, or grocery store? Explain to me exactly how after meeting a girl for a "date", everything beyond hello is somehow sullied by the online interaction.

Well off the top of my head you can't do thse through online interactions:
-Body Language
-Kino
-Eye contact
-Voice inflections
-Actual conversation skills (there is no awkward pauses to fill on the net)
-Sarcasm and detecting sarcasm
-Ability to make the person comforatble and attracted to you through above methods

And explain to me how online introductions are counterproductive to everything YOU believe this site stands for?

This site is about getting out in the real world, abolishing all AFC tendancies, and meeting ladies. In that order. If you still use the internet as a crutch you haven't abolished all AFC tendancies, you've just re-inforced them with this negative action of "Online Dating" (or introduction if thats how you want to explain it )



Quit crying about this, its pointless and just wasting my time.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by diablo
The most recent was posted in 10 days ago, and again today. It's a 6 page long thread with nothing but links to people on this site's pictures (as I stated in your thread discussing this topic in depth). For verification, the link is contained here.





I haven't called anyone a loser - and in reference to me being one simply by the fact that I've taken it upon myself to try to help keep this forum running smoothly, I'll "retaliate" by posting a series of pictures in the very near future that will have you drooling onto your keyboard...

Oh for the love of Christ...

For anyone who has their forum preferences set on the default (like I do), you DO NOT SEE THREADS FROM PAGE 6!

If people can't see the g0ddamned thread they are NOT going to post to it...OR read it.

 

[MRomeo99]

Well off the top of my head you can't do thse through online interactions:

-Body Language
-Kino
-Eye contact
-Voice inflections
-Actual conversation skills (there is no awkward pauses to fill on the net)
-Sarcasm and detecting sarcasm
-Ability to make the person comforatble and attracted to you through above methods

Are we talking about the same thing? You do realize I'm not talking about dating someone online. I'm talking about using an online service to be an introduction. If you're only going to send IM's or emails, then yes you would be correct.

However, I spend very little time online interacting before I get face to face, or at least get them on the phone. Three days usually, and a maximum of 3-4 emails. Then we either move to the phone or in person, or I'm moving on.

Let me explain what I consider some of the advantages of online introductions.

1. My profile works when I'm asleep. I don't have to expend any energy past the setup, and women contact me.
2. I can find out rather quickly whether this is someone that meets my criteria PRIOR to us spending time together. Can't tell you how many dates over the years I would have preferred to get out of.
3. It's cost effective, only $10+/- a month
4. Women approach me, it's a whole different perspective.
5. If you're looking for it, it's quite easy to find FB's online.
6. It's not that hard to get out there and really dominate your market.

This site is about getting out in the real world, abolishing all AFC tendancies, and meeting ladies.

I can accept your definition. Even if I think it is a little flawed. Ultimately I believe the only thing that matters about being a DJ is having the life that you desire with the people you desire in it. I will use whatever means I have at my disposal to create the life that I choose.

While you accuse me of using "crutches" to reinforce my AFC-ness, I have date after date with real women. I interact with women in real life, that I happened to meet online. For a crutch that is holding me back, I'm enjoying the hell out of my life right now.

 

[NewMan]

* Moderators should close BS threads. These should include questions that are so basic that it's obvious the person has not read the bible (The "What do I say to her" questions). From my point of view this isn't happening as much as it should in the main forum.

* Moderators should have the maturity to do their job. This means not deleting posts because they don't like it - I believe under any circumstance it should be unacceptable for any moderator to delete a post - just because they think it's of no use - or because they do not like the topic at hand.

Do I like internet dating? Not really. But I realise that it is part of a DJ arsenel.

Any true DJ would not ignore all possibilities to meet women - this includes internet dating. By ridiculing internet dating you are going against the DJ principles.

 

[Vincent]

Originally posted by NewMan
* Moderators should have the maturity to do their job. This means not deleting posts because they don't like it - I believe under any circumstance it should be unacceptable for any moderator to delete a post - just because they think it's of no use - or because they do not like the topic at hand.

Well its a good thing I rarely delete posts

Oh yeah, and MRomeo, I could care less what benefits your online dating services have. Being a Don Juan takes time and energy, so you're only cheating yourself using those tings.

I'm done with this thread though. Bye.

 

[NewMan]

**
Oh yeah, and MRomeo, I could care less what benefits your online dating services have. Being a Don Juan takes time and energy, so you're only cheating yourself using those tings.
**

That's a mature statement.

If you'd bother to read any of the replies you'd notice he uses it as an way to meet women.

That's the tip of the iceburg. From there he still has to DJ the girls.

There nothing there that's "Cheating". And since you talk about that - reading the bible must be cheating as well....

 

[Hot Ice]

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by diablo
As I posted elsewhere, I've got no problem with sexing a girl who I've met over the internet, but I don't think that it should be done by someone who can't first consistently attract and seduce a woman off of the computer. If used properly, the internet can be a powerful tool in your hands - but it's easy to become too reliant on it and substitute actual physical approaches with IM's to girls instead. While I won't close a thread simply because it deals with online dating, I don't believe that they are a benefit to our site.

Whoa D., I had no idea you felt that those posts weren't beneficial to the site. I agree that the Net isn't for most noobs and that is probably why it has such a negative stigma attached to it from their frustration.

None the less, it seemed to me that the thread was closed because of personal reasons (not yours). I will admit that you've given me something to think about.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Romeo
...
Much like every single possible thread dealing with on line dating will deal with meeting in person. Regardless of whether you mention it or not. If you're looking for help on your internet profile, it's obviously not because you want to be the coolest guy on your block with your profile. It's because you ultimately want to meet women in real life. I have yet to see a post/question that didn't deal with real women.

Now, if someone asks a question like how do I go in chatrooms and find girls to have cybersex with. Granted, delete away. But, any questions that are legitimately about online dating, should be fine within your rules as far as I understand them. Is that the way I understand it....

Good point, nicely and accurately stated.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Vincent
Well off the top of my head you can't do thse through online interactions:
-Body Language
-Kino
-Eye contact
-Voice inflections
-Actual conversation skills (there is no awkward pauses to fill on the net)
-Sarcasm and detecting sarcasm
-Ability to make the person comforatble and attracted to you through above methods
...

But V, how about those of us who can pull women on-line without having to depend on the things in your list? I replied to one of your posts asking to give a legitimate reason/benefit to on-line dating and I gave you several. I also asked what had been your experience with sarging on-line.

I didn't even mention that I can make a date to meet one of these women after work by just answering an email from one of them during my coffee break. I will say that I am pretty fvcking awesome to be someone that women would want to meet from just reading a profile and looking a pic. All of this without needed to #close. I'm not saying that your list isn't valuable skills, but if you know what you are doing, they aren't necessary to meet a woman.

What the Net allows you to do is to easily and quickly find women with specific qualities that interest you. I work 40+ hours a week, work out several times a week, play sports on the weekend, go out with the guys at least once a week, go out with a women a couple of times a week plus go to school (part time).

Time is a precious commodity to me. The net allows me to give a once over of 10 or so women and select to engage 2 or 3 of them all within 20 or 30 minutes. Within a week I'm having coffee with at least one of them.

I'm not saying that I'm a PUA but I have mad skills. I still pick up women in clubs or where ever but they are usually women that I just enjoy hanging out with as either friends or friends with bennies. The women I select from the Net are ones I could consider dating because I already know from their profile that they possess many of the qualities that I'm looking for in a relationship.

But getting back on track, it just seemed that your reason for closing the thread was personal. Diablo posted some specific reasons why he didn't think the on-line thing was beneficial to the site that made me reconsider my stance for posting about Net dating. But now I'm considering retracting that because of this information that is on the site. Using the Internet Personals . There's more articles in the archive similar to this one.

I'm rambling....
$FD

 

[NYC Dude]

Just because you can do something doesn't mean that it is the right thing to do. Closing a thread because you don't like the concept behind it is a stupid thing to do because it gives posters and viewers the idea that it is wrong to post their ideas. The main parts of the forum deal with the idea of "Discuss meeting, dating, and attracting women with others. Ask a question or give advice." Does the message that you send when you close legitimate threads (ones dealing with the subject of meeting/dating/attracting women) because you don't like what they're talking about do any good? Besides showing the power that moderators have to "close any message," it does nothing to further the ideas of the forum.

Another point of interest is the closing of threads that have been answered before. Simply saying "Thread Closed. Read the bible/use the search feature" does not truly help the problem. If that were the case, every thread would be closed because I can tell you that ideas in nearly every post have been discussed at one time in the past. Unless there is something disruptive about the post (flaming, trolling, actually not relating to attracting/meeting/dating women) it should stay. New ideas do not only come in the philosophical epic posts, but in replies to other people's problems. Closing threads simply stops those new ideas from being heard.

 

[diablo]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Diablo posted some specific reasons why he didn't think the on-line thing was beneficial to the site that made me...

While I don't think that it's beneficial to the site, I think that it may be beneficial to certain people. The primary objective of this forum is to get people out into the "real world", and to overcome any fears, shynesses, or weaknesses they might have. These same people, if they find out how completely non-threatening picking up girls is on the internet, might be tempted to use this as their sole source of conversation to someone of the opposite sex. However, someone who already knows what they're doing, and isn't afraid to go and make an approach in real life who uses the internet isn't going to fall into the habit of using nothing except the internet.

That being said, and to take things to a more personal level, I've been intimate with several girls who I've met online. Sunday night I got a call from a girl who I'd talked to for several weeks, and only met briefly once before who'd just found out her fiance was cheating on her - I went to pick her up, and within 2 hours we were sexing. (She stopped halfway through though and broke into tears... "I can just tell its not him!"... I guess I was a revenge ****, but that's just the way it goes sometimes...)

However, I wouldn't really care too much to see thread after thread filling the forum regarding different ways to pick up girls over the computer. In my own opinion (which I seem to be giving a lot in this thread), if someone can't hold a decent conversation with a girl over the computer, and is asking for help, the odds are great that he can't do it in real life. Thus, we would be reinforcing his behavior of settling in and getting comfortable meeting girls only through the computer.

Oh, and Wyldfire - as for your forum settings, this is understandable. However, I'd hope that you understand that yours is not the first, or the last, thread that has been closed or will be closed with someone posting their picture. Nobody singled you out for anything; you were treated just as everybody else who's done what you did has been... you are turning a molehill into a mountain. Chill, and let it die.

NYC, I may be speaking for myself but when I find someone who's posted concerning a topic that's been addressed many times before, I usually do a search for the keyword in all of the titles of the different topics, then paste that link along with the closed thread notification. However, why can't they just do it themselves? Not everyone's going to baby someone just because they can't click the "search" button.

 

[MRomeo99]

If you don't mind, I'm going to ask you to stretch your mind just a little bit again.

While I don't think that it's beneficial to the site, I think that it may be beneficial to certain people. The primary objective of this forum is to get people out into the "real world", and to overcome any fears, shynesses, or weaknesses they might have. These same people, if they find out how completely non-threatening picking up girls is on the internet, might be tempted to use this as their sole source of conversation to someone of the opposite sex. However, someone who already knows what they're doing, and isn't afraid to go and make an approach in real life who uses the internet isn't going to fall into the habit of using nothing except the internet.

A few ideas I have about this.

1. It's not really that easy to pick up women on the internet. Get a few emails here and there sure. But actually find a decent girl to hang out with. Not that easy, it's actually difficult to get that part of your game fine-tuned. And trust me it took a lot of trial and error to be able to convert the initial emails/IM's into actual decent interactions IRL. Fell flat on my face many times before I got the knack of it.
2. There seems to be this prejudice that unless you make a cold approach, then you're "not a real man". So, that means anyone you work with, they are out. A social circle target, out. And obviously internet, out.
3. After you've been dating/screwing someone for a month, is it somehow better if you ran a perfect game on her, with some SS mixed in, and the perfect kino. Or is it somehow worse because you actually were introduced by your cousin? Or GASP met on the internet.
4. Reality is there are going to be some people who will never go out and do a cold approach. But, if they are achieving what THEY want. Not what I want, or what you want. But, what THEY want, then who are we to say they are wrong. I think SS is pretty much crap, but I'm not knocking anyone who uses it, as long as they are getting what THEY want. As the internet dating trend continues, it will become more and more popular. There will be guys who only use online dating services. But, if they are getting all the women they desire, does that somehow make it less meaningful. Online dating is just a technology, nothing more, nothing less. This site (in my mind) has always been about getting what YOU want, regardless of technique used to get it. Observe the health forum, and the discussion on developing a financial forum. I'd like to see this continue.

In my own opinion (which I seem to be giving a lot in this thread), if someone can't hold a decent conversation with a girl over the computer, and is asking for help, the odds are great that he can't do it in real life. Thus, we would be reinforcing his behavior of settling in and getting comfortable meeting girls only through the computer.

If he can't handle a decent conversation over the computer, guess what, he gets to get better. Just as he would if his approaches weren't working, or his numbers technique was for ****e. It's just a skill like any other, no more, no less. I have yet to see anyone want to just get good at having meaningless conversations in IM with girls. And every discussion has been ultimately about how to meet the girls, and get what ever it is that they want. I'm never going to give someone advice from the lessons I've learned online that is going to convince them to stay at home, and not meet any girls.

Thanks for the input Diablo. It was nice to see what the moderators actually think.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by diablo
...if someone can't hold a decent conversation with a girl over the computer, and is asking for help, the odds are great that he can't do it in real life. Thus, we would be reinforcing his behavior of settling in and getting comfortable meeting girls only through the computer.
...

You do have a point there, but it usually happens with guys that want a quick fix, pickup line that will get them laid. Like I said in another post, someone 'borrowed' a personal ad that was posted in the forum, got a serious reply by a woman with a high IL and didn't know how to answer and asked for help. I saw it coming. I gave the guy who posted the ad some sh1t about it. I will admit that my online game skyrocketed once I tuned up my street game.

 

[Eternal]

Thread is now re-open and not because of the argument going on here.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Eternal
Thread is now re-open and not because of the argument going on here.

So who the h3ll is going to take credit for it? That svcks!! Couldn't you have pretended that we peons had won?!!! C'mon, humor us a little.....

 

[Eternal]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
So who the h3ll is going to take credit for it?

The big man on this site...

 

[Hot Ice]

Is this any worth to read?

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Hot Ice
Is this any worth to read?

Nope.