"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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WTF is going on?

Adrian

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 28, 2002
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Alright now this is really pissing me off. I keep meeting many girls that are giving me their signals. I fight off my AFCness and be the DJ who I should truly be, go in for the number, call a few days later etc. I would call a few days later and invite them to do something with me and they either A)NEVER EVER call back B)Refuse or cancel at the last minute. This happened to me about 3 times so far in the last couple of months. Eventually I'll find out that they have boyfriends. Also what really pisses me off even more is that the same girls who reject me in this manner eventually continue bieng around me with their stupid flirtatious behaviour as if nothing happened, Ask me to do them favors (Which I always refuse) and still give me signs of interest. WTF is going on here? They already have boyfriends and they reject me. Why do they do this? If I ever do see them again I overdo it with the cold shoulder and they get pissed off and I never see them again. Are there many women like this? I think it would also be my fault a little because I nevef ask any girls if they have boyfriends. But they should at least let me know before giving me their phone numbers.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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SDBmania

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 29, 2003
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This has happened to me too. At least twice now, one I got her number the other I didn't. The first girl seemed interested, then I found out that she was going through a ruff patch with her bf and it seemed like it was going to end. But, now she will not return my calls and I'm not sure what has happened. Just got to get over it! Find someone else.
 

Grey Fox

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 14, 2003
Messages
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When they start trying to get you to do things and flirting with you, there are a few things you could try.

One start talking about other girls, like their friends and the fact you find them more attractive.(Doesn't have to be true, all it does is make her insecure.)

Two its not your fault that they have BFs and don't mention it. They are just playing stupid little games like a little girl would. When you cold approach or approach a girl that you have only known a short while, its safe to assume that they will have flaky behavior. For now on set your first dates for a week night, that way its not a huge a deal to them or you. For some reason people think its a big deal to go on a date on the weekend.

Oh and there is good old number three.

JUST WALK AWAY. Whenever a girl would try to put me in the LJBF zone I have said that I have enough friends already and pretty much never talk to her again. Why should you any way, she is wasting your time, and probably adds nothing of interest to your life other than being a hot chick and there are plenty of those.

-Grey Fox
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
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Location
monrovia, CA
First, don't take it so personal. Personally, a girl with a BF has never stopped me, but if they are engaged or married, I leave them alone, even as friends, that's disrespectful.

First, you don't seem to be really... Natrual. Don't get me wrong, you are doing what you are supposed to do, but it looks like you are following a manual. You don't always have to do eveything by the book. For instance, I personally NEVER next a girl. Why? Because to me, that's inefficent. Why? why should I not talk to you at all if you are not sexually interested in me? You have friends, even some good looking ones, I could meet one of them at a party and you can put in a good word with me. Also, there are times, espically for me, when I am not looking for sex, but would like a partner to go to the movies with.

Also, most of the times, these girls will come around, espically if you have other women.


Anyway, instead of nexting, I just don't pursue them any longer. I may call 1 or 2 times a month just to keep in touch, but I always make sure to ask them to meet me someone, I don't like the idea of calling and not asking for a date.
 
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