Wtf! Im way too nice

[werdmaster]

I just cant stand it. Im way too nice. This is gonna sound gay but, im highly in touch with my emotional side. And it constantly interferes with getting a55. Of course ive read "Nice Guy vs. Jerk" wich basically told me that i mite as well become gay if i were to be nice.

Its just in my nature to be nice to people. I dont like seeing people in pain, I like to help people, and frankly being a jerk would be lying to myself.

At times I just feel like saying fvck being nice, and becoming a jerk. But, I just come back to being nice.

So how do I go about "de-fagitzing" myself?

 

[assassin]

Hey,

I'm still new to this site but from what I understand, it's not about becoming a jerk, rather than attaining the qualities of a jerk. Just build your confidence and forget about rejection. There's no point in chasin afer these chicks if you aren't going to be able handle being rejected once and a while. Take the chicks off the pedastal and don't let them intimidate you. Once you get the hang of these it will start coming naturally to you. Good luck bro and don't give up.

Also don't be in a hurry to change your self. If it takes a while to get out of the nice guy habbit who cares. Any improvement is good.

Also, just cuz your in touch with your feelings doesn't make you a fag. It just brings you closer to knowing exactly what you wan't from life.

 

[kevbo]

lol. de-fagitizing. the nice guy image in posts around here is pretty much a stereotype. there not literally saying to go out and be an ass hole to everyone. being a "nice guy" is more like doing the afc stuff like calling all the time, letting her walk all over you and control you in any way, showering her with gifts, etc. the "jerk" is the guy who knows how to stand up and put out the vibe that he's in control of his life. the jerk knows how to make fun of a girl to get a laugh rather than give her all the same compliments that she can get from any other guy in the world.

you say you don't like seeing people in pain, and that you like to help people. big deal! that doesn't stop you from being a man. someone who enjoys pain is just an ass hole, plain and simple. a guy like that isn't really going to get far in life, because he's always going to lead a rather empty life with nobody around him.

also, you're not a fag for being nice to people, and the way you describe nice is not what we mean here buy being a "nice guy."

along with that, just listen to assassin, and you'll do fine.

 

[R3N3G4D3]

What's been said so far is true, many newcomers confuse being a DJ and being an a55hole. The two aren't synonyms. Sure you tease the girl and joke occasionally, but everyone does that. Here is an example of what "nice guys" do wrong: If a guy treats you like 5hit, then you won't stand for it, then why do you let girls do that to you? That's what the "jerk" part emphasizes, if they are being an a55hole towards you, don't keep trying to be friendly with them just because it's a girl.

 

[Jerky Boi]

I agree. I think a lot of people get a$$hole and DJ mixed up at times. It's alright to be a nice guy. I consider myself somewhat of a nice guy. You really don't want to be categorized in either one though. A DJ isn't just a nice guy or a jerk. A DJ is a "classy" guy. Sure, he's nice to women and treats them with respect, but at the same time, he respects himself enough to not let a woman treat him with disrepect.

 

[Supero Masculus]

The whole point of the post, "nice guy vs. jerk" Was to explain NOT to be a DOORMAT!! It doesn't mean you have to be an a$$ to get a chick just do yourself a favor and don't be a doormat. YOU owe it to YOURSELF!!!

 

[Sniper2k]

Here's an idea...

You don't have to be nice nor do you have to be a jerk. You have to be YOURSELF and be proud of it! A DJ does nice things, but he does it because he WANTS to not because he thinks it'll get him some p*ssy. A jerk can act tough all he wants, but that alone won't get him some p*ssy, he's gotta show he can be a great guy too. Basically a DJ does what HE wants all the fvcking time. Whether he wants to be romantic, flirtatious, etc. He is confident in himself at all times and doesnt try to please people all the time. He pleases HIMSELF.

 

[ak5]

man after many experiences in my life, i learnt that you just automatically start becoming smart and not incorporate feelings into business.
Try to think more logically then incorporating feelings into everything. Start with logic and dont assume anything, if the other person shows their feelings side, you can show urs, but dont be a girl and tell them your deep emotional feelings. Its not because itll make you seem like a girl but its because of what the girl can do/the state you put the girl in by telling her this....it just comes naturally if you just go PU. You will fail and learn from your mistakes and will be smarter next time around.