WTF Happened? Any thoughts?

[TakeItAll]

I was dating this lady in San Francisco (I live in LA). We were having fun, sleeping together, enjoying each other etc. She was a great chic, as far as chics go… So here is the deal, I had to spend a week in SF for training. I go up the weekend before and we get away for the weekend and have a great time. My company was going to pay for the following week’s hotel, as I was in training. But she says “stay with me.” So I say sure! She even brings me to dinner at her father’s house that week. I thought it was a little soon (about 2 months into the relationship).

I give her a call several days after the training is over and try to set up a time I can get to SF and see her maybe the following weekend. She pages me back a few days later and says she needs some space. I go out of town for 2 weeks, have not talked to here and when I get back she pages me and says we’re going to fast…!!? A few days later I tell here “take care.” So now, were not seeing each other at all.

Did she just changer here mind about us? Can someone who speaks “chic” help me figure out what happened… Thanks.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

She's seems a little off bro! She smuthers you with attention, then trys to play the "were moving to fast" card? WTF!! Don't waste your time with her and your money, flying to SF all the time!!! You mentioned that you ate dinner with her and her father? How did that go? Seems like her Dad might have objected for one reason or another.


PIMP

 

[TakeItAll]

Dinner went fine, got good feedback (that is at least what I was told). In fact I made it a point, before she told pops I was coming, if she really wanted me to meet them. We never had the relationship talk, which I kinda blew off and she never brought up. I had met her brother several times and we were kool. I was totally blind sided by this one.

BTW, I do get free airtravel (I work for an airline)

Thanks, at this point “next” is the operative word… My curiosity is killing me though…

 

[flexion_]

You'll never know the reason.

"We are moving too fast" means she just doesn't like you - don't take it personal.

 

[TesuqueRed]

Originally posted by TakeItAll
...Thanks, at this point “next” is the operative word… My curiosity is killing me though…

At one level, you now know all you need to know (and next is the operative word.)

Chances are you'll never find out, even if you wait 2 years and then ask her directly. You may piece it together if you see what she does over the next few months (hooks up with a new guy, for example), but being in LA you may not be around to get any info.

You may already have clues about why she did it which you don't recognize at the moment. It could any one of -

a) LA-SF is an LDR, despite your free air tickets, which is geographically undesirable for anything other than having an affair on the side (allows for controlling access, keeping BFs from meeting up, reduces gossip in common social circles, etc.)
b) she added things up and decided you're not the one for her
c) family objected
d) met someone new nearby
e) you came on too strong (doesn't sound like the case)
f) you didn't pass muster with her friends (doesn't sound like the case either)

I'd say it's d), the others are just further justifications to pile on a decision based on d), and if she didn't have d) the other reasons wouldn't compel her to end things just yet.

After awhile it won't matter the reason, and when you get to that state you'll probably have a far better understanding of what the reason is by seeing the signs ahead of time or reading her responses better. The "reason" is often cover for something else, and it's that something else you'll recognize and won't need explained. The "reasons" just tend to cloud the picture and misdirect you, which is kinda what they're intended to do, if you think about it. The majority of them can be reduced to "buzz off, I'm not interested anymore, I can do better elsewhere." Like I said, you probably know all you need to know.

 

[TakeItAll]

Originally posted by TesuqueRed
After awhile it won't matter the reason, and when you get to that state you'll probably have a far better understanding of what the reason is by seeing the signs ahead of time or reading her responses better. The "reason" is often cover for something else, and it's that something else you'll recognize and won't need explained. The "reasons" just tend to cloud the picture and misdirect you, which is kinda what they're intended to do, if you think about it. The majority of them can be reduced to "buzz off, I'm not interested anymore, I can do better elsewhere." Like I said, you probably know all you need to know.

Thanks man, great post.
Its always tough getting the boot... But hey, I got a great weekend planned!!!
Thanks for all the posts...