Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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WTF????...Expected the C&B but got the #close

FUBAR75

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Help me out with this. I am a new rAFC going through boot camp. I went out tonight with some friends to have a good time and of course started talking to some girls, HB7, HB6, HB6. I zeroed in on HB7 and started up a convo. The initial 5-10 mins went great, but then I ran out of things to say. I could see her interest in me fade. Negative body language, would not look at me, etc. I stood there acting like a major AFC while she talked to her friends and my friends worked on her friends. The music was really load so it made convo really hard and being a dumba$$ without anything to say did not help. I occasionally tried to talk to her again and again, but it did not go so well. Finally, when I was about to head out I decided to go for the for the #close. I am going through boot camp and I am only on week 2, but I figured I would speed things up and get one rejection out of the way. So here is how that went:

ME(with good EC): I never got you name.
(I know big mistake I should have introduced myself in the begining)

HB7: It is blah blah with a big smile and holding the EC..

ME: I really enjoyed talking to you. Let me get your # so we can go out some time.

HB7: Ok, do you have a cellphone or something? She types the # and has trouble remembering her # so asks her friend what her number is. Friend gives number typed into phone. Good sign. At least it is not a fake #.

So I am shocked. Guys all night have been coming up to her and she seemed much more interested in them than me, but they never went for the close. (good for me)
Since I am still shocked that she even gave me the # I push to see if she is going to blow me off when I call.

ME: So you are not just busting my balls? When I call you we are going to go out right? I don't want to waste my time.

HB7(Clearly aggitated)Yeah, of course we can hang out.

So he is where I am at. Of course I am going to call her. I need some tips on what to say when I call. I figured I would call her Sunday afternoon and see if she can go out for drinks Monday night. (She is between jobs so she should be free.)


For my own record:

What I did right:
I talked to her (thanks to the DJ tips and my fellow bros advice)
I asked open ended questions.
I maintained good EC.
I used kino (loud music made this easier)
I talked to her friends.
I did not buy her or her friends a drink when they hinted about it. (not sure if this was good or not, but I got the # and saved $6. My chump friend bought them a round.)
I went for the #close.

What I did wrong:
I did not introduce myself in the beginning.
I ran out of things to say/ask and got nervous. (of course I thought of 100 of them on the drive home.)
I stayed in the area too long when there were gaps in the convo like an AFC dumba$$ while I tried to think of something else to say.
I made some lame jokes.
I did not approach anyone else.
 
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"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Krak

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FUBAR75 said:
ME: So you are not just busting my balls? When I call you we are going to go out right? I don't want to waste my time.

HB7(Clearly aggitated)Yeah, of course we can hang out.
Here's another mistake, you sounded needy and clingy when you said this. You shouldn't have said anything and just called her in a couple days.
 

FUBAR75

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Yeah I agree, but at the time I was thinking she was just being polite giving me the number. If she was going to blow me off when I called I would rather have her reject me then and there. I can deal with the girl blowing me off when I call a lot better then when I ask her for her number. This probably was/is the wrong mindset, but after being such a chump around her I wanted the rejection as another step on my way to being a DJ.

But like I said, I have the # now so I need some tips on turning it around when I call her.
 

blinkwatt

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FUBAR75 said:
Yeah I agree, but at the time I was thinking she was just being polite giving me the number. If she was going to blow me off when I called I would rather have her reject me then and there.
There is no such thing as reject, or getting blown off, its all just a lesson learned and a lost oppurtunity for them.

This is a prime example on why you should keep the conversatin quick and get the number and leave,go sarge on.
 
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