"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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WTF do I do... a friend (thats a girl) emailed me saying she loves me and has feeling

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Popeyes

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Ok basically I don't know wtf to do. I just got the following email from a friend of mine. We're not really that close of friends, but I chilled with her quite a bit last year

"Popeyes i have something to say to u... this is a little hard for me...ok

here goes

Popeyes....ever since september last year ive had feelings for u..i told myself again and again to put them behind me...but i realized last nite when i was looking at your picture on my lap top...that..i just cant

Popeyes i love you....please call me so we can talk about this...**********"

Ok so I'm a 2nd yr university student and I've known this girl for the whole of last school year and the beginning of this one. I wouldn't say we are really good friends, but I went over her house with these guy friend of mine quite alot, mainly because one of my guy friends liked her (he told her this, but she basically told him that she didn't want to ruin their friendship, but they still seem cool and chill a bit). So I'm not sure what to do. She sent me this email on Thursday and I didn't check my email till today. And I did this by logging on MSN messenger and then reading it. The thing is she was online @ the time so basically right after I read it I logged off, so she probably knows I've read it. Now my problem is how do I convey to her that I don't see her that way, and like being her friend, without fvcking up her self esteem or whatever. Mind you I've never been in this type of situation before and want to let her down easy without having things get all fvcked up. Basically have any of you been in this type of situation and what did you say/how did it turn out/etc. Just looking for some advice here.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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sanyo7878

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I was in this situation once and i tried the whole "i like you as a friend but I don't like you that way. I have feelings for someone else".... THat girl will hardly speak to me if i run into her on campus now. Good luck brotha.
 
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flyinshark

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so you dont like her at all? she's not good looking? do you have a gf? why won't you give her a chance?
 
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flexion_

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Like you said she isn't that close of a friend anyway. Just tell straight up that you don't feel the same way. If she drops out of your life no biggie. Its not your problem.
 
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Popeyes

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sanyo7878 said:
I was in this situation once and i tried the whole "i like you as a friend but I don't like you that way. I have feelings for someone else".... THat girl will hardly speak to me if i run into her on campus now. Good luck brotha.
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So what exactly did you say?

Anyways I'm thinking of just emailing her back, it seems like it's gonna be wierd on the phone.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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mrRuckus

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Oh god...

Just tell her you're not interested.

Seriously... that's it. There's nothing you can say except LIE to preserve feelings. ANd that's what women do. Except they do it poorly and PATRONIZE you and give you false hope.

Be a decent person and just say sorry i'm not interested in you in that way. Then it's her problem if her self esteem is soooo damaged. If her self esteem is so hurt maybe that's why you're not interested in such a weak individual.
 
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