"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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WTF Did I go Wrong?

B4IFURU18?

Don Juan
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I have been dating this girl for the last 2 months or so, and very recently she's been very cold. We haven't hung out in the last two weeks, and have had very minimal contact.

She said she's very busy with school and work, and doesn't have much money right now. Understandable, but I mean, it costs nothing to come over and watch a DVD, have sex, etc. Seems fishy.

Prior to this she was all over me, inviting me to spend weeknights with her. I spent the last couple weekends up North with her and we had good times. We were intimate and enjoyed one another's company. No sex though. I've gotten close with her.

What's the deal? Has she lost ALL interest or what? I'm really confused about this because I wasn't clingy at all and we've always had fun in each other's company. Secondly, I think of myself as a pretty cool guy, that has a good sense of humor, and generally girls don't just lose interest...I'm not used to this at all.

The last time we talked, late last week, she said she's working 9 days in a row, and that she's busy. I basically told her that when she's not busy to call me, because I wouldn't be calling her. How's my play?

I really want to do something with her soon, but feel handcuffed because I told her to call me.

At what point do I just say "Fvck It" and call her up?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Docs

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So...you haven't seen her in two weeks. You're too strubborn to call her...because you think you're doing thie right thing.

Week three WILL come if you don't do anything....

Give her a damn ring.
 
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So you had sex with her but now she says "No sex"? She is seeing another dude!!
 

B4IFURU18?

Don Juan
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LMS - No, we have never had sex. Where in my post would you conclude that we have had sex?

Docs - I've tried a couple times to get together with her, and it hasn't happened. Interestingly, she invited me over one night a week and a half ago, but I declined because I was busy. I think this bugged her because she's made it a point to be "busy" all the time now.

I feel like if I'm the one who keeps calling it's going to alienate her and make me look clingy or something. I'm not really sure.

I don't want to play a "hard to get" game and see who can hold out on calling the other longest. That's stupid.
 
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ok - no sex. Maybe she is just very busy and/or maybe there are other dudes jockeying for her time and you are but one of many. In any case, you did the right thing - do not call her - she knows you are interested so no need to keep calling her and being a pest!! She is not stupid - let her make the next move!

Women are never too busy for a man! So there may be others involved!
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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B4IFURU18?

Don Juan
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Update: I just sent a few texts regarding Salsa dancing lessons. Got a partner...

I'm sure things are fine, I'm just worrying about senseless ****.
 

Docs

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Docs - I've tried a couple times to get together with her, and it hasn't happened. Interestingly, she invited me over one night a week and a half ago, but I declined because I was busy. I think this bugged her because she's made it a point to be "busy" all the time now.

I feel like if I'm the one who keeps calling it's going to alienate her and make me look clingy or something. I'm not really sure.

I don't want to play a "hard to get" game and see who can hold out on calling the other longest. That's stupid.
Then call her. It's only a hey, what's up.
 

Phyzzle

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I'm sure things are fine
I wouldn't be so sure. This is how girls break up with me. At some point, you have to take the hint and give up.

If you want to really make sure, the next time you talk, say, "so you're done with work in 9 days? How about we celebrate at . . . . "

I'm guessing she'll say, "well, um er that depends on a lot of things uhhh, call me back that day and we'll see." If she does this, or cancels on you, it's defininitely over.
 

B4IFURU18?

Don Juan
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Well, you could be right.

I talked to her today about joining me in some Salsa lessons, and she obliged. A good sign...
 
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