Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Wow! I fail

TheWayOfAllFlesh

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I went on a night out last night and failed so much. because i didnt even dare try. i had no idea why. i come on here and take all the advice i can. then get pumped up and ready for a night out then when i get there i dont want to approach anyone because my mindset is that i most certainly will be rejected by anyone i approach. go figure
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Daddy The Pimp

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At this point , you should force yourself to approach. Force your body.

But when being 100% sure that you'll be rejected , your sub communication will be weak and there is a big chance that you'll be rejected.

So , find your values and start having more self esteem. When you know that you're worthy for that girl (if not better) , youll go in and get her with your sub communication.

Until you find your values , start approaching , you might open successfully sometimes. And when the outcome is good , your mind will give you the permission to be the cool guy and this is when you're in STATE. And , when in state , ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN !! You can even fly :p
 

Lexington

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I've been at that stage. It's really hard to get through. But you have to realize that we can never progress without trying. And yes, there is a good chance that you will fail. But failure is a stepping stone for success.

Just go out there and approach. Don't even worry about the result. Just do it for the experience. In fact try and make it a game: see how many rejections you can rack up.

After you get rejected enough times, you don't even care much; the sting is gone. That's when you're set to be a true DJ. Even if you had the worst game, if you could approach 100 girls, you would probably land one unless you're morbidly obese or somehow deformed. I fact you'd probably be surprised to learn that you could land a few more than that.

Probably the most important part of being a DJ is to get over that mortal fear of rejection. It REALLY isn't so bad. If a girl rejects you, it's not the end of the world. In fact, it's not bad at all. It's a slight blow to your ego, but that's okay....just move on to the next target.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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usscrum

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Trust me I've been there man. I am still pretty much an AFC at heart but I have all the tools I need to change my mindset completely and I am making good progress. Its always been hard to approach random girls but I am slowly becoming more comfortable doing so.

The only thing that these guys are going to tell you is that you need to JUST DO IT. I know, it sounds like weak advice but it is the ONLY way you are going to make progress.

I've been in your shoes for like 4 years man. I would get all pumped up to go meet girls and then ***** out when I get the opportunity. I realized that I was placing too much emphasis and excitement on the girls and not just having fun. Pumping myself up so much just put more pressure on myself.

Next time you are about to go out, think about having FUN. Make girls an afterthought. If you are having a good time with your friends and not putting pressure on yourself, approaching is so much easier. Also, if you are having fun girls will notice and they will be drawn to you. I was at a formal party thing on Saturday night with a bunch of my buddies. None of us can dance and we were making fools out of ourselves on the dance floor but we were having a DAMN good time. Girls noticed and came over to dance with us. I approached more that night than I have in the past year it seems like.

And guess what?? MOST GIRLS WANT TO BE APPROACHED!!! I am sure you have read this everywhere on these boards but I doubt you truly believe it. I didn't until Saturday night when I finally got the balls to start going up to girls at parties and talking to them. I was wearing the whole suit and tie thing and I knew I looked good as hell. That and a little liquid courage finally gave me the balls to just start talking to girls. I didn't give a damn if they liked me or not because I knew I would be having a blast either way. And guess what? Every single girl I talked to was interested in talking to me! I danced with a few girls, got one number and could have gotten 4-5 more if I wanted to. I was having too good of a time with my buddies to remember to follow up with the other girls I left hanging. Trust me, that's a good feeling. We went to some other parties and I went up to every hot girl I saw. I had never done that before. Some I could tell weren't interested, others were, but every single one of them enjoyed talking to me.

Sorry for the cluster**** of a post, but this weekend was eye-opening for me and approaching will be a lot easier for me from now on. ANd trust me if I can do it, so can you. I used to be terrified of girls.
 

TheWayOfAllFlesh

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as much as i agree with you all on putting having fun first, well i went out with this mindset and i didnt enjoy myself. not because im a grumpy loon but because my old mates are boring to me now. we have nothing in common seeing as we dont go to the same college anymore. and my new mates arent the sort of people to hit the town frequently which is a shame because i have more fun with those guys
 

TheWayOfAllFlesh

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Well it happened agin last night. Not even the drink helps. If anything it makes me more nervous
 

mtlwlu

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Remember at the end of the day, the only person youre rejecting is yourself.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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DonJuan11

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TheWayOfAllFlesh said:
- I went on a night out last night and failed so much
- i dont want to approach anyone because my mindset is that i most certainly will be rejected by anyone i approach.
- i am picky
Your don't want to approach because your ego is fragile (the hot girl might put me down because I'm not a doctor and haven't studied 10 long hard years and it will shatter me if she tells me off for wanting to get into her pants) By being picky you always find fault with an average women and play it safe. That way when you don't approach you can always tell yourself "I'm too good for her" or "She's not a 10, not worth my time" or "She has to be hot for me to put the effort in", so then you can put the blame on the girl instead of yourself.

If you don't have game, yes you will be rejected by anyone you approach
If you are tactful, show real interest in her, make her comfortable, make her laugh, and have game, you will see results

You cannot expect to have sex with a Gisele look-alike when you have nothing to offer her. ("You should have sex with me right now without me even talking to you or making you laugh. Don't you know who I am??) If she's giving you sex, what does she get in return?
 

xdreamz

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i was never like that .. i never worried about failure because the prize before my eyes blinded me from it. but that in itself caused failure to literally slap me in the face. so yes be cautious of failure, with an accepting and humble heart if it does come, but do not let it be a hindrance, just a stepping stone to your success.
 
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