"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Wow, I didn't realize you're so boring!

syncmaster

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Hey All;
I've noticed a few things latley. I don't have nearly the amount of time now I did in highschool. I've had to up my standards significantly. Below are a few observations i've made in the first week of university.

Grade means absolutley nothing... I've got a 3rd year (super hot and really smart) in my 1st year class. I got her number and i'm nothin' special. People are a lot less "clique" than in hs. This is a HUGE advantage.

Most girls who were big fish in high school are small fish in Uni - they all think they're really special. They're not. There's about a 1 to 20 ratio of girls I'd consider hanging out with. No matter how hot she is if she can't answer the simple question of "what do you do with your time?" without saying "hanging out with friends or shopping" then she's not worth it. Out of all the fish in the sea set your standards high or get labeled a man *****.
For girls who reply "shopping and hanging out with friends" try throwing this line out. "Wow, I didn't realize you were so boring!". Watch them squirm and defend themselves. "No i'm not!"... It's fun to watch because they're not used to it.

I'm finding it very difficult to have intelligent conversations with people my age. Most first year students are complete airheads so i've had to resort to finding girls older than I am. Now this isn't necessarily a bad thing but it does put a spin on things. They're more difficult to meet but worth it.

Don't get impatient. I did this and screwed up bigtime. It's the first month of Uni - things are going to be chaotic. Wait till things cool down and then set up more time.

I've found it phenomenally easy to talk to new girls. There are SOO many opening questions. "What are you taking?" , "What year are you", "How are your classes", you can comment on something about a class or even just her in general. There are a TON of questions to start the ball rolling.

Lunch dates are great! You can fit them in between classes, go eat in the campus caffeteria or restaurant and you have a reason to end it early - you have a class. It's also cheaper than night out and is a more relaxing environment.

So that's it for now - but i'll continue posting updates & new observations.
As a little bit of a trailer - i'm working on a fairly large psychological study of colones and age groups of women. So far my theory has proved spot on - but we'll cover that later.

- Adam
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Disconnect

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Hell ya! I just finished my first week of uni, and I already met some pretty cool people. Good thing, since barely anybody I used to know went, and I had absolutely nobody in any of my classes. So gotta start talking to people. And it's even easier with 3 hour breaks between classes.

I'm not yet as open as you are (I wish I was. I missed tons of opportunities, but I'm flooded with them right now, first week and all, so I hope to get better fast), but I'm going to this big 'indoors' beach party tonight, and see how things go. About 4 000 people is the capacity, I think, so plenty of opportunities. No luck needed :D.
 

I'm Joe Dirt

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I'd advise against the typical "whats your major?" type questions, because girls get asked that all the time. Hell, even I get asked that all the time by everyone.

Go with something more unusual. I think that would help you differentiate.
 

Bible_Belt

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I ask the major, and then I make several generalizations based upon it - "oh, you're one of those types. " They expect "oh that's really neat" but they get a neg hit instead. Sociology want to save the world, psych majors are messed up in the head themselves, poli sci are power brokers, engineering/computers are nerds. Say it in a fun way and laugh, and the HB will be led to start persuading you that she is really not one of the stereotypes. This sets the frame of her working to win your attention - the way it should be.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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h2o

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bump...you definitely make some good points...

I do have a few comments.

1)
Originally posted by syncmaster
For girls who reply "shopping and hanging out with friends" try throwing this line out. "Wow, I didn't realize you were so boring!". Watch them squirm and defend themselves. "No i'm not!"... It's fun to watch because they're not used to it.
This is great...I say stuff like this a lot actually, but...remember, you have to have something to say when she flips it on you! You can't bust on her for being boring but then say the same "I like to hang out with my friends in my free time," when she gets flirty and asks what's so interesting that you do ...I sometimes say to her, "you have to come and find out ;)

2) Personally, I haven't had much success with campus pickups (although I've had limited experience...I've only recently gotten over fears and crap), because I've found very similar to you, that I prefer older women that I can have some conversation with...and the older ones seem to appreciate your approach more than the younger girls, who only want to hang out if you have alcohol...I've definitely clicked a lot better with older girls

3) Yeah, and those openers are very easy...except, I also have to go with JoeDirt on this. If you use that opener, make sure the entire conversation doesn't go downhill on boring subjects...open easy, but then divert to more interesting subjects...she can talk to anyone about her major/classes/school...don't be that anyone, be different, and make her remember you

Overall, great thread...keep us posted, and have fun!
 

syncmaster

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I never thought of that - Joe Dirt pointed it out but Bible_Belt hit home! That's such an awesome idea w/ the neg hit and all. Shows you have a sense of humor. Wonderful idea.
 
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