"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Would you still date this girl after she said this?

Production6257

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I have been dating this girl that I'm really into for a month. We went longer than I have ever gone (by far) with any girl without having sex. This past weekend we finally did it after a month of dating. It went well and all blah blah blah. Anyway she told me I was talking to her drunkenly the next night and apparently told her that she should be less conservative and more sexually aggressive. I made this comment because even when we were escalating along foreplay and sex, she kept saying "Must...have...self-control". She was saying this pretty much jokingly but I still didn't get it. Well after she told me I drunkenly told her that I said it's kinda true and I don't really get why she felt that way. She then said this: "haha I told my friend you called me conservative and she couldn't believe it. I swear I've never been like this before".

I responded with "thats interesting..." then pretty much stopped talking to her. Maybe I shouldn't read much into it. I need some advice though because I don't want to waste time with someone who can jump all over any other guy but feels the need to be conservative with me. What do you guys think?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Mantis Toboggan

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So what's the big deal? She said that she'd never been this "conservative" before?

Sounds like words to me. Who cares? You called her conservative. So she's trying to prove to you that she's cool.
 

Production6257

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She is really not the type to try to prove coolness to anyone. She's actually already pretty wild and very confident, and that's part of what attracted me to her in the first place. My concern is: is she using me to "settle down" after going crazy on other lucky dudes for the past however-many years? I don't like that idea. And I don't understand why she feels the need to hold back her sexuality with me.
 

bigneil

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That's happened to me before. The girl basically admits they are a slvt yet wants to make you wait. I took it as a sign that she wasn't that attracted to me, and that she was wild with guys she had only known for a few hours while making me wait weeks.
 

Obameros

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I don't see the problem. There's too much over analysing going on here
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Igetit!

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bigneil said:
That's happened to me before.
Me too.



This has more to do with the OP and how behaves around this girl than the girl herself.


Personally,I believe that women have the capacity to be EVERYTHING depending on the guy who approaches her.


A girl can be a girlfriend to one guy,and to another guy,that SAME GIRL can be an AW. And to another guy that SAME GIRL can be....

a friends with benefits,and to another guy,

a stuckup snob,and to another guy,

a ljbf situation,and to another guy,

a flake,and to another guy,

a wife or fiancee.



And which one of these she'll be depends on what the guy brings to the table. That's why everytime a guy comes here talking about how some girl is acting like an AW to him,I'll tell him it's his fault,and it is.



Look at what this girl said. First she said,"I told my friend you called me conservative and she couldn't believe it". Then she kept saying over and over again,"Must...have...self-control". Then she said," I swear I've never been like this before".



This girl wants to "get it on",lol. When he called her "conservative" I bet she was thinking,"Boy,this dude doesn't know me at all,lol."


I bet her friend cracked up laughing when she heard he said that.


I mean damn,the girl was chanting to herself,"Must have self-control....must have self-control" like she was some sort of addict trying to WILL HERSELF away from her addiction.


But somehow,all this sexuality,or "caged heat" she has going on inside her,somehow he's managed to miss it,and only this one little comment of hers tipped him off.


Something about the way he interacts with her is causing her to keep this side hidden from him. I don't know,maybe she thinks he'll judge her if he see it,or maybe she thinks if she reveals it,she may scare him off,who knows,but whatever it is,it's causing her to not feel fully comfortable showing that side to him.
 
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