I have a plate, 1 of 3, and am concerned about a number of red flags and possible BPD presence.
I have been sleeping with her for about 5 months now, we first did it within an hour of meeting (red flag 1) and I enjoy her company a lot. However, I am becoming increasingly concerned about her as time goes on.
From the outset I was aware she has extreme mood swings and is unreliable - she is always a little late, never ever on time. She never seems keen to meet and displays very low interest, yet always does meet without exception when I ask to. She smokes a LOT of marijuana, like every day. She has daddy issues - I am a lot older and her dad died when she was 2 or 3. She admits to prostituting herself on one occasion when she was unable to buy food. She has stripped on one occasion she admits to for the same reason. All her friends are men she has either slept with or who she says want to do so.
She has no female friends. She has no job. I am aware this is not in any way LTR material but have enjoyed hanging out and banging her a lot. Everything she says adds up and her stories are impossible to pick holes in, but they simply don't make total sense. I have not managed to catch her actually lying, but I am almost 100% sure she is dishonest with me and I find it impossible to believe she isn't sleeping with other guys despite her assuring me she isn't (I haven't asked for this) and no direct evidence to the contrary. For a long while I thought she was simply a very honest person, however I am wondering now if she is simply incredibly good at lying and hiding the truth.
This girl is extremely hot, when we go out if I go to the washroom she will be hit on 3 or 4 times in the couple of minutes I am gone. While I am a decent looking, confident guy, I have never quite worked out why she spends 3 or 4 nights a week with a much older guy when frankly she is a head-turner who could attract pretty much anyone. I am pretty sure I am not in any way her usual type, having seen photos.
I have not been bothered by the many very obvious red flags, because I really have no interest in a LTR with her, however lately I have begun to wonder if even the casual sex is a good idea. The sex is the best I have ever had, out of many women. She tell me I am also the very best. Another red flag.
A few days ago we spent an evening together where she simply spent the whole night staring into space. She commented briefly on how she felt empty inside, and my BPD alarm went off. Her eyes were vacant and she did not seem to be able to hear or even see me most of the time. She spoke very quietly and said a few bizarre, nonsensical things, including how she hurts everyone she meets and is evil and damaged.
I have had experience with BPDs in the past and didn't think this was one, because she doesn't love-bomb or idealize me at all or seek any commitment, however, there are many other signs that this may be something similar to BPD. At first I thought she may simply be depressed, or bipolar, but I think it may in fact be more serious. We get on very well, but I am sure she mirrors me sometimes, although we disagree on many things and have very different tastes generally (mainly due to the large age difference).
My logical mind says keep sexing her as long as possible while I am detached, however I have a terrible strong gut feeling of panic now when I think about her and am not sure why. I know there is something very weird about this girl, and have a strong instinct to next her, but I also don't want to give up the great sex and very hot plate without reason. I am not emotionally attached at all and enjoy the time together a lot, however my gut is clearly telling me to run away fast. Maybe it knows I am in danger, or maybe it is paranoid? What should I do? I don't want to throw away great sex with a very hot girl, however I am aware BPD is to be avoided at all cost, if this is what it is, and am really unsure how to proceed.
I have been sleeping with her for about 5 months now, we first did it within an hour of meeting (red flag 1) and I enjoy her company a lot. However, I am becoming increasingly concerned about her as time goes on.
From the outset I was aware she has extreme mood swings and is unreliable - she is always a little late, never ever on time. She never seems keen to meet and displays very low interest, yet always does meet without exception when I ask to. She smokes a LOT of marijuana, like every day. She has daddy issues - I am a lot older and her dad died when she was 2 or 3. She admits to prostituting herself on one occasion when she was unable to buy food. She has stripped on one occasion she admits to for the same reason. All her friends are men she has either slept with or who she says want to do so.
She has no female friends. She has no job. I am aware this is not in any way LTR material but have enjoyed hanging out and banging her a lot. Everything she says adds up and her stories are impossible to pick holes in, but they simply don't make total sense. I have not managed to catch her actually lying, but I am almost 100% sure she is dishonest with me and I find it impossible to believe she isn't sleeping with other guys despite her assuring me she isn't (I haven't asked for this) and no direct evidence to the contrary. For a long while I thought she was simply a very honest person, however I am wondering now if she is simply incredibly good at lying and hiding the truth.
This girl is extremely hot, when we go out if I go to the washroom she will be hit on 3 or 4 times in the couple of minutes I am gone. While I am a decent looking, confident guy, I have never quite worked out why she spends 3 or 4 nights a week with a much older guy when frankly she is a head-turner who could attract pretty much anyone. I am pretty sure I am not in any way her usual type, having seen photos.
I have not been bothered by the many very obvious red flags, because I really have no interest in a LTR with her, however lately I have begun to wonder if even the casual sex is a good idea. The sex is the best I have ever had, out of many women. She tell me I am also the very best. Another red flag.
A few days ago we spent an evening together where she simply spent the whole night staring into space. She commented briefly on how she felt empty inside, and my BPD alarm went off. Her eyes were vacant and she did not seem to be able to hear or even see me most of the time. She spoke very quietly and said a few bizarre, nonsensical things, including how she hurts everyone she meets and is evil and damaged.
I have had experience with BPDs in the past and didn't think this was one, because she doesn't love-bomb or idealize me at all or seek any commitment, however, there are many other signs that this may be something similar to BPD. At first I thought she may simply be depressed, or bipolar, but I think it may in fact be more serious. We get on very well, but I am sure she mirrors me sometimes, although we disagree on many things and have very different tastes generally (mainly due to the large age difference).
My logical mind says keep sexing her as long as possible while I am detached, however I have a terrible strong gut feeling of panic now when I think about her and am not sure why. I know there is something very weird about this girl, and have a strong instinct to next her, but I also don't want to give up the great sex and very hot plate without reason. I am not emotionally attached at all and enjoy the time together a lot, however my gut is clearly telling me to run away fast. Maybe it knows I am in danger, or maybe it is paranoid? What should I do? I don't want to throw away great sex with a very hot girl, however I am aware BPD is to be avoided at all cost, if this is what it is, and am really unsure how to proceed.
