Wyldfire said:
You're not going to like my honesty here...but if you use what I say productively it will help you out a lot.
You are doing something that makes you come across as too needy and vulnerable. It's okay to show that side to a woman once she already has feelings for you...in fact, showing some vulnerablity then will actually work well for you...but you can't do that too soon or you'll spook her. Women don't typically want to deal with a man who is more dependent on her than she is on him. Something you're doing is giving off that bad vibe. The "I hope you're alright" and "I've got too much going on right now" are the key comments here. When a woman says she hopes you're alright she is seeing some kind of weakness. When she says she has too much going on right now she is saying that she senses that getting involved with you would be more of a chore than reward. In conjunction with the other comment...it's almost certain that she thinks you are too needy and would suck her dry emotionally.
You should try to figure out what it is you're projecting that gives off that vibe because if you don't you'll continue to run into this sort of thing a lot.
Not at all, I apricate it, because you did explain what you base your view on. It seems like an educated response, from what I know.
Yet, I don't have a clue how I could be coming across as needy. I mean the 1st text was a response to a text which I sent to her, simply saying that I enjoyed the evening, and the second was a response to one which I sent to her (I tried to call, but her phone was off, I think she had class at the time, and I was busy that day, so sent a text, rather than calling again later) The text read "Did your week go well? Would you like to meet again, maybe lunch and a film, or maybe the park, I can push you on the swings. x" (The swings relating to her telling me that she likes to be a child sometimes, and go to the park and play on the swings). I don't know, maybe the fact that I text her gives this impression? Perhaps it is that I was not definate about what the second date would be, but the 1st time I was very definate and ****ey, like "I am taking you for dinner on x at x time at x restaurant" so I did not think this would be needed again... Perhaps I'm wrong here.
The reply I sent to her 2nd text (because she replied 2 days later) was "Not to worry, I'm actually out of town untill Wednesday at least, But I hope we can meet again, you were really interesting! x" (I am actually out of town, so could not meet her anyway)
I do like this girl, and she definatly showed signs of interest when we met, so I don't want to let this one go easily. Now I know the common response is going to be, plenty more fish in the sea, let this one go. However, the problem is, I date a lot of girls, and I like very few of them, well, make that all but one other except this one, and it was a similar situation with that girl too.
I have a mutual friend, who would put in good words for me and try to pursuade her, or even ask the reasoning for her response should the need arise, so this is also an option, but in my opinion this would only be a last resort, and even then I don't think something like this is going to work.
