women who want to know your past

[drmeathead]

granted any man that gives detailed exploits of his sexual past to a woman he is in a relationship with is an idiot but what is the best answer to "how many girls have you been with?" "how could you be talking to me and get with her?" dont ask dont tell is the general unwritten rule unless of course you have a social disease or a child. how do you handle a woman who insists on knowing. making a joke only gets you so much time? do you lie? dump them?

my personal experience was that i lied at first. then felt guilty after a month and told her. then had it held over my head for the rest of the realtionship. even to the point that i responded with "dont even start with your bull**** again". i learned my lesson.

the reason i asked is that a woman i know recently began questioning her bf about who he was with when they were "together but not together but not not together". i told her to let it go. that no sane guy is going to put up wit hthat ****. she cant let him go but cant let that go. crazy stuff like not being able to go to the guys house cause he took other girls there while they were in their psuedo relationship.

sorry i rambled there a litt.e what do you say to a woman like that. i am guessing "later" is the best bet.

 

[Poll]

I usually tell her, "you mean like with real girls?"

 

[Vulpine]

"how many girls have you been with?"

V: "A gentleman speaks not of his conquests."
HB: "Serously, how many girls have you been with?"
V: "Seriously?"
HB: "I wanna know."
V: "More than you."

If she still presses it, get a pen and paper as if you were about to write a note and ask her:

V: "You're right, this is an issue. When is the best time for you and I to go to the clinic and get tested together?"

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

V: "A gentleman speaks not of his conquests."
HB: "Serously, how many girls have you been with?"
V: "Seriously?"
HB: "I wanna know."
V: "More than you."

If she still presses it, get a pen and paper as if you were about to write a note and ask her:

V: "You're right, this is an issue. When is the best time for you and I to go to the clinic and get tested together?"

I agree that it's nothing to speak about. To me, women who ask this type of thing aren't worth my time; too many insecurities. I will admit that women have jokingly suggested that I ***** around which is another thing altogether.

 

[Vulpine]

I agree that it's nothing to speak about. To me, women who ask this type of thing aren't worth my time; too many insecurities. I will admit that women have jokingly suggested that I ***** around which is another thing altogether.

A compliment, or a woman with LSE... or a little of both.

They can't believe that a guy could be so great and good - so they fault-find.

"I mean, with all these great qualites, there must be a line of women in front of his door. I'm not this lucky; there must be SOMETHING wrong with this guy. What is it? I know! There's a line of women at his door! I could never compete, I better break this off."

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Iron Rule of Tomassi # 2
NEVER, under pain of death, honestly or dishonsetly reveal the number of women you've slept with or explain any detail of your sexual experiences with them to a current lover.

The single most disastrous AFC move a man can make is to OVERTLY describe past sexual experiences and/or give a number (accurate or not) to how many women he's been with prior to the one he's with. This simple act ALWAYS comes off as pretensiousness and is often the catalyst for an avalanche of emotional resentment, if not outright emotional blackmail from an insecure woman. This is a rookie mistake that will only take you once to learn.

If a woman puts you on the spot by directly asking you for this information always sidestep this COVERTLY. C&F works wonders in this situation and still keeps the air of mystery and challenge about you.

Her: "So how many girls have you been with?"
You: "You're my first actually"
Her: "Really, how many girls have you been with?"
You:" You mean tonight?"
Her: "C'mon, how many girls have you been with?"
You: "You know, I really lost count after 50" (or something outrageous).

When a woman asks you this question she is seeking confirmation of what she already suspects - NEVER give her this satisfaction. When a woman resorts to OVERT communication (COVERT being her native language) she's generally exhausted her patience to be COVERT and this is a desperation tactic for an insecure woman.

 

[Vulpine]

V: "More than you."

This is why I love this response... C&F PLUS confusion.


It can be taken at least 3 ways:

"I've slept with more women than you have." (the truth... usually?)
or
"More people than you." (more partners in general)
or
"Others, including/besides you." (Again, probably the truth)

And I failed to explain this part:

V: "You're right, this is an issue. When is the best time for you and I to go to the clinic and get tested together?"

You have to do it in a manner that turns the tables and implies that she's a dirty wh0re.

Like, "WHOA! This IS an issue." And be way over-the-top about it. Like you just realized from her bringing up the subject that it's a major concern and you are suddenly scared to death of catching something from her.

 

[azanon]

misc

I agree with RT's advise 100% if you intention is to use a condom or its with a woman you dont trust (or both).

If you're with a smart one though, and you dont want to use one, its not going to be this easy. I know i wouldnt go bare on a woman that i didnt have a very strong idea how many men's she's been with, so a woman who's my intellectual equal will expect the same and the bulls*** answers/C&F is basically going to result in "your ass is wearing a condom" or "your ass is going to get a urology certificate" then.

SoSuave does make the one mistake of assuming all women are just not very smart, and unfortunately (fortunately in my opinion) some of them are. There's no one rule fits all.

 

[amoka]

"I really lost count after 50...

Brilliant.

 

[MacAvoy]

The last time it came up, I exaggerated to throw her off guard. I said something about how Wilt Chamberlain slept with 20 000 women and I'm chasin him but haven't quite reached his plateau yet.

I wouldn't recommend using the # 50 though. Its a little too risky. They might take it as a real number. Once my ex said something about me sleepin with prostitutes and strippers in the past, I ignored the comment and kept the convo going elsewhere but meanwhile I was thinking how the fvck does she know about all those wh0res.

 

[drmeathead]

yeah rollo i learned that the hard way and told my ex. she held it over my head on a weekly if not daily basis. i learned i learned i learned. my new response is "yes i have kissed other women, no i wont tell you anymore than that." i then expect to wait her out on the pout trip or the temper tantrum that would follow.

my next question is how do you handle specific inqueries about specific women. "how much did you do with liz?" or "did jen blow you? etc.

 

[MacAvoy]

my next question is how do you handle specific inqueries about specific women. "how much did you do with liz?" or "did jen blow you? etc.

Every women blows me. I fvcked her 3 times a day. make sure you do it with a ****y attitude.

 

[Blusher]

You may be jokingly evasive and play around with the question but that will only buy you time. At the end of the day. there's no good honest answer to that question other that:

Whether it's a little or a lot, it will seem like a lot to you anyway necause you'll start visualizing what I may or may have not done with another woman. I fail to see what that would bring to our relationship and I won't divulge this kind of thing. So pick a number between 1 and a million, if a number's what you want.

As for Rollo's suggestion:

Her: "C'mon, how many girls have you been with?"
You: "You know, I really lost count after 50" (or something outrageous).

I would say if it's actually the case!

 

[mzilla2]

Be careful, in my experience, chicks that ask questions of that nature are either insecure and it'll lead to more, or gathering ammunition for future volleys. ****y/funny is a good policy. If she persists, seriously question what she's after.

You want a chick that looks forward and making things good with/for you and gettin her bell rung, not one that critcizes and dwells on your past!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...You want a chick that looks forward and making things good with/for you and gettin her bell rung, not one that critcizes and dwells on your past!

This is so true, but you often hear guys judging a woman by her history too. If I'm knocking 'da boots and having a good time I'm not worrying about who the woman slept with in the past that helped her get sexual experience, I'm just hoping that I don't get a muscle cramp.

 

[86]

oh, thank god i found this thread. thank you.

 

[Bonhomme]

I like MacAvoy's refinement of RolloT's line.

When women ask me what I've been doing and I tell them (among other "ordinary" things) that I've been "carousing around with strippers," it does not seem to turn them off.

 

[muttley]

The girl im in a relationship with now wont ask me. She wonders about it. She knew i had a little history with girls before we hooked up and knew of my player background. I told her straight up, "ask me what ever u want and ill tell u. Ask me about my past, ill tell u.I want u to know everything about me"

i told her that i aint gonna lie to her, aint gonna bullshyt her and gonna be real.

You know what? She doesnt even go down that road. She doesnt wanna know!
Shes like "awwwwww, honey...your past is your past and thats not important"

She told me she accepts me for who i was/am and that my history or past is none of her business.

She knows i will tell her in a heart beat if she asks how many girls ive been with and that i wouldnt give a shyt. It secretly turns women on knowing that their man was desired by lotsa women and that he could have more women anytime he wanted, but sticks with her cos she is the special one in his eyes.

I dont care, ill tell em anything, usually the truth. **** that shyt.


peace out

 

[Hydroblunt]

It's like trying to correctly answer the "Do I look fat in this?" question.

Nice info guys, I usually try to completely avoid the question.

 

[( . )( . )]

To be honest with you this topic is really a non issue.

Chicks secretly dont give a crap about the numbers of others youve poked, instead of numbers shes more focused on how much of a social conduit she suspects you may be for her or the fun you've provided. Chicks are just curious about you and this line is just another avenue she can use to gauge what type of man she's dealing with, she knows fully well anyway but verbalisation of it is really just her fluff more than anything.

Just joke it off as the others suggested.