Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Women who laugh at the idea of DJism?

MrJibbles

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So I went to the mall today. I was going to try to approach girls and get numbers, but pvssied out. Oh well, I'll try next time, and keep focusing on self-improvement. I'll start keeping a journal once I get the ball rolling and keep you guys posted.

On another note, I ended up at Chapter's, flipping through the pages of various books in the Psychology section, when I overheard a conversation by a couple of women. They were probably in their mid-to-late twenties, and one pointed out the book "Dating for Dummies." They both laughed at the idea, thinking it was ridiculous. Like, I mean, how could anybody need a BOOK to learn something that's so common?.

Ironically, two or three weeks ago, I overheard another conversation at the same bookstore, except it was with a guy and a girl in their mid-to-late twenties. They may have been dating, or the guy may have been an orbiter... I don't really know. Anyway, they pointed out the book "Flirting for Dummies" and also had a good chuckle at that, scoffing at the idea.

I think most people don't know that there are actually a lot of guys out there who could use books like these, myself included. I don't think there's anything to be ashamed about buying one of these types of book. The DJ Bible and Book Of Pook changed my life, and I would recommend these books to every man who has even a tiny bit of difficulty with women. Everything from body language and kino escalation to tone of voice and topics of conversation don't come naturally to not just some, but I would say most people.

But why does most of society ridicule this type of self-help? Many men were stripped of their masculinity growing up, through both feminist-driven media and mothers telling us to be "nice to girls", so it's only natural that we'd like to pick up a skill were never taught. Not everybody can date successfully.

If that were the case, nobody would be single, right? Besides, the fact that the bookstore even sells these books in the first place stands as a testament to that.

With all of this being said is "pick-up artistry" (not exactly DJism, but related) frowned upon by most women, and society at large, for that matter?
 

PapiChulo

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Not really, they ridicule the people who have to learn this things by the book because they are somehow less socially "intelligent" than them, as well as the gimmicks commonly associated with it. Simply put, folks attempting pickup are basically nerds. But they don't realize that experience and some theory found in the books can put you at a higher level than them, in essence making all the aquired knowlege your second nature. You always have to make it appear natural and effortless like a force of nature.
 

Down Low

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Yep. Any habit you learn and practice eventually becomes part of what you are. Over time, clumsy mimicry disappears when you made it your own.
 

Mike32ct

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People who have had it easy in the dating scene such as those 20something girls in the bookstore can very condescending towards those that struggle and need help.

"Dating is easy for me. Someone who needs help is a loser.".

That's the mentality.

However, women are much worse about this than men are. Not just hot chicks either. Some girl who is a 4 will make fun of a guy who is a 6 or 7 that can't get laid. She feels superior to him because she still get some if she really wanted it.
 

Bible_Belt

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Women find DJism insulting for good reason - its very existence says that they make poor choices in regard to sexual partners and can be easily manipulated. What if the title of the book were How to Get Married Without Having Sex? Would you be insulted by a book that taught women how to manipulate men?

I'm all for self-improvement, but realize that what you read in just about any self-help book is going to be mostly baloney and put there to sell the book. Even with other subjects, the knowledge is usually outdated. I once met a jiu-jitsu world champion, a very famous guy who had just published a book showing how to do all of the techniques he had invented to win the world championship. We asked him if he was worried that he was giving away all of his secrets. He laughed and replied, "Oh no, not at all. I've moved on to new techniques and don't even use that stuff anymore. That's why it's all in the book."
 

Iceberg

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The women who are laughing at DJ-ism are buying Cosmo magazine because it's the issue with "12 tips on how to keep your man." or "6 sexual secrets to make him sweat".

Don't believe the hype.
 

MrJibbles

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Mike32ct said:
People who have had it easy in the dating scene such as those 20something girls in the bookstore can very condescending towards those that struggle and need help.

"Dating is easy for me. Someone who needs help is a loser.".

That's the mentality.

However, women are much worse about this than men are. Not just hot chicks either. Some girl who is a 4 will make fun of a guy who is a 6 or 7 that can't get laid. She feels superior to him because she still get some if she really wanted it.
That's something along the lines of what I was thinking, too. Men are expected to lead and require all the social skills to attract, develop rapport, and ultimately sleep with a woman. Women just have to wait around for guys to approach, and men do all the work.

If a girl is 5 or higher in looks, she could be the most socially-retarded, b*tchiest, uninteresting person in the world, but STILL she will be able to reap the benefits of the male sexual drive (i.e. she has the luxury of not having to put work into her social and sex life). I think a large portion of women go through the better part of their youth getting so much attention from guys that they don't really NEED to have good social skills to get intimacy, sex, money, etc. from men. They only have to look good.

As a result, they are completely oblivious to the plight of a guy who isn't that great with women. Men would be able to empathize with a shy, timid, awkward guy with girl problems. Women, however, would laugh at the idea.

I believe that laughter is often the result of observing or examining something that one does not understand. In that sense, it follows that women who scoff at pick-up artistry are laughing at something they don't understand.
 

PapiChulo

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.... laughting at something they don't understand.....because of ignorance/stupidity.
 

Mike32ct

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What's easy for one person might be very difficult for someone else. So women may view PUAs or even DJs as tryhard because in their minds, dating is effortless.

Guy at a party thinking:

"Wow she's cute. I guess I should go talk to her. I hope I don't get rejected. What do I say? Should I get her number? What is her IL? Are her friends going to c@ckblock? Is she even single?"

Girl (hamster) view:

"Dating is easy. John just came up to at this party. We talked. I gave him my number. Now I'm sort of seeing him. Why would anyone have to read a book about dating or join some website lol? Men only need to hang out and do nothing like me lol."

This is why women love to give that cliche advice that "it happens when you least expect it."
It's not just mainstream brainwashing. For most women, that is their experience. It SEEMS to her that boyfriends just appear out of the blue effortlessly. They have no idea the work that guy put into it. So they think some lonely shy guy will experience the same effortless magic and a girl will come to him. So they tell him to just be patient lol.
 
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