Women who dance "provacatively" at clubs

[edger]

When hangin' at a club, near the dance floor, and some hot chick(who's not even vibing you) starts dancing provacatively(either grinding with some other hot chick or just moving around with provacative/sexy overtones), which route do you personally take; do you cold-approach her, try to make eye contact, or just ignore her?

I employ the "ignore" route. And I do that because(as I'm sure some of you can guess) I don't want to appear as the AFC that looks mesmerized by her like every other guy with that "you're really turning me on, I want you" look, so I'll play it up cool, ignore, and pretend that I'm not phased by her provacativeness. But this is the problem; I pretend I'm not phased and don't give a f*ck, and ignore her - which means I make no eye contact with her. I feel like if I try to start a conversation with her or if she catches me glance at her, she's gonna lump me in with the rest of the guys who "fell for" her provacative behavior. And I don't want her to believe she's had any kind of influence or power over me, which would show I've lost control of my game. I wanna stay in control at all times and never be perceived as a guy who looses control to a woman. But in reality, I want to f*ck the crap out of this chick and wanna get a conversation going, but I can't because I don't wanna be lumped in the category of the being mesmerized or intoxicated by her provocative dancing. It's a total catch 22. Either you'll be perceived as an AFC and come up empty-handed, or you'll ignore her and come up empty-handed.

 

[wjh]

get off the dancefloor.
it's not a good place to have a convo.
she'll take a break and you'll chat her up at the bar where you'll be hanging out sans desperation with your friends having a great time.

 

[swifTy]

dance with her.
its what she wants.
she's looking for a hot guy to dance.

sometimes she just wants to dance with her gf's and get some attention, but if your hot, and you can dance (not look stupid and embarass her), i can't see any reason why she wouldn't not dance with you and give you an opening.

 

[jophil28]

When hangin' at a club, near the dance floor, and some hot chick(who's not even vibing you) starts dancing provacatively(either grinding with some other hot chick or just moving around with provacative/sexy overtones), which route do you personally take; do you cold-approach her, try to make eye contact, or just ignore her?

I walk right up to her on the floor , take her hand and pull her into me until my face is 4 inches away and then say, " You are not doing that right. Im gonna teach you to Mambo right. The first lesson tonight is free but after that it runs $1 per step and $2 per turn. I take Visa or cash."

The look on their face is priceless. A few dates often follow, sometimes more.

Ahh ! That is the payoff from taking Latin Dance Class for 20 years.

 

[Tazman]

Yeah, ignoring her will have zero effect unless she's already into you. You take a chance and walk up to her and start dancing or invite her to dance with you.

 

[bornyesterday]

I'm not an expert on this subject nor am I a DJ but these are some thoughts of mine that come to mind.

Trying not to look like all the other AFC's is an AFC thought. You thinking about which frame to choose that will turn her on gives her all the power. You have to start from the feeling of your own self worth.
Ignoring her is what many AFC's do to try to look cool and indifferent, but it doesn't work because you'll never establish a connection.

Making eye contact is not a bad thing, it depends on how you do it. Don't be the first to look away, have the gaze of a confident sexual being. Don't try to hide your own motives as many AFC's do. They are like pavlovian drooling dogs (picture their scared, horny, miserable faces) that don't dare to take a piece of food for fear of getting an electric shock.

But after you have made good eye contact you have to make a move is my guess. Dance with her. If you don't dare to don't try to hit on these types of girls. If you approach after her dance is over the contact will be much much harder I think. The dance is where she opens up and the opportunity lies there.

 

[zinc64]

When hangin' at a club, near the dance floor, and some hot chick(who's not even vibing you) starts dancing provacatively(either grinding with some other hot chick or just moving around with provacative/sexy overtones), which route do you personally take; do you cold-approach her, try to make eye contact, or just ignore her?

I employ the "ignore" route. And I do that because(as I'm sure some of you can guess) I don't want to appear as the AFC that looks mesmerized by her like every other guy with that "you're really turning me on, I want you" look, so I'll play it up cool, ignore, and pretend that I'm not phased by her provacativeness. But this is the problem; I pretend I'm not phased and don't give a f*ck, and ignore her - which means I make no eye contact with her. I feel like if I try to start a conversation with her or if she catches me glance at her, she's gonna lump me in with the rest of the guys who "fell for" her provacative behavior. And I don't want her to believe she's had any kind of influence or power over me, which would show I've lost control of my game. I wanna stay in control at all times and never be perceived as a guy who looses control to a woman. But in reality, I want to f*ck the crap out of this chick and wanna get a conversation going, but I can't because I don't wanna be lumped in the category of the being mesmerized or intoxicated by her provocative dancing. It's a total catch 22. Either you'll be perceived as an AFC and come up empty-handed, or you'll ignore her and come up empty-handed.

Hahah...IMO you are an AFC just by having to pretend like that. I walk up and grab her and then after the first song leave to get a another beer once my drink runs out. If she doesn't oblige, I leave....simple strategy that works more times than naught. Of course, you have to take control of her if she's dancing like a freak and not be all timid. Sometimes, she be a nothign tease...others she'll be the real deal. It's a gamble.

 

[Eddie417]

Ahh ! That is the payoff from taking Latin Dance Class for 20 years.

I've been taking Latin for 6 weeks now. Please tell me I'm going to stop feeling like a dancing bear someday. Seriously man, caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror it's not pretty. And the whole hip thing - pain, pain, pain. Ha.

 

[edger]

Hahah...IMO you are an AFC just by having to pretend like that.

I definitely see how one would think that. But, you have to understand what's at play in situations like this...of course, you might go up to her and start dancing with her and she may invite your advance, but more often than not(you say sometimes, which I disagree), when a girl is dancing "provactively", she is an attention wh*re; nothing more, nothing less. MOST of the time you won't be spending time with her after the dance is over, nor will you get laid that same night by her, NOR will any "hangouts" or dates ever follow. A woman like this is a "c*cktease", nothing more, nothing less. She will grind you like a drill grinding a hard concerete surface, but that is all, a guy shouldn't expect anything more, most of the time. So, based on what I'm saying, paying her no attention and acting like you're not phased while she's dancing provacatively, actually isn't AFC..because the guy paying her no attention is smart enough to realize that his efforts with a chick like this most likely won't get him anywhere, and he'll end up looking like a fish that was lured in by bait, and look foolish. I think a lot of guys also have to understand that when women go out to bars and clubs, they're not always "looking" to hook up with someone. There are nights when they're out with an agenda to hook up, and there are nights when they're out with an agenda to attention wh*re and be c*ckteases. Women can afford to waste their nights away being attention wh*res and c*ckteases, because they'll ALWAYS(if they're attractive) have a steady supply of guys available to them wherever they are, literally.

 

[Jitterbug]

Consider it a call-answer dance. She starts with her stuff, you follow with yours. Show that you're attracted but still have control over yourself. If you know how to dance, you'll realise that most of those chicks can't dance for sh!t. They can only show off their assets and are totally off beats. You'll feel more in control then, and you'll have something to show them (just like what jophil said).

You're right that most of the time they're out there just to be c0ckteases and attention-wh0ring, but remember that women do change their minds very easily.

Also one thing to keep in mind: it's not just the girl you're dancing with that you're gaming. It's also the ones around who see you dance.

 

[edger]

If ANYTHING is going to get you in bed with this chick, it will be a result of you paying her no attention while she's dancing provacatively and being the c*cktease that she is. What I'm saying is you'll have more of a chance of f*cking her.

 

[jophil28]

I've been taking Latin for 6 weeks now. Please tell me I'm going to stop feeling like a dancing bear someday. Seriously man, caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror it's not pretty. And the whole hip thing - pain, pain, pain. Ha.

Just keep on keepin' on - your body will "get it " soon. The first 6-8 weeks is like Dance Boot camp.
Being a good dancer is the fast track to lots of women with lots p*ssy..

 

[Jitterbug]

If ANYTHING is going to get you in bed with this chick, it will be a result of you paying her no attention while she's dancing provacatively and being the c*cktease that she is. What I'm saying is you'll have more of a chance of f*cking her.

Paying her body no attention (not the kind of attention drooling guys do anyway) but you pay attention to her dancing. Big difference. If you just stand there doing bugger all, your chance is as good as the chance of the army of guys drooling around her. But stepping up to her and showing that you're a better dancer and can lead, that's money.

My mate and I went to a club the other night just to chill out after a whole day of dance workshop, but they had a live jazz band playing, so we thought of doing a bit of dancing (we're swing dancers). There were two girls dancing provocatively just like you described. We "ignored" them but did our stuff right in front of the band so they saw what we were doing. Got applauded by everyone, as people took their eyes of the girls and on our moves. It was obvious that they couldn't actually dance and we know our sh!t. After we went back to our seats, those two girls went to our table, opened us and we got their numbers before we left.

 

[ketostix]

If ANYTHING is going to get you in bed with this chick, it will be a result of you paying her no attention while she's dancing provacatively and being the c*cktease that she is. What I'm saying is you'll have more of a chance of f*cking her.

Edger you have to make a judgement call and weigh you're own abilities, your take on whther she's an AW, and your timing. If she looks like an AW she probably is, so like you said best to ignore her. Although it really doesn't matter if you ignore her or not from the point of view of hooking up, because either way you're probably not going to hook up with her. But if you feel confident in the situation and on the dance floor, and you doubt many people will notice if she rebuffs you, then you need to go in boldly like Jophil said.

 

[DJDamage]

Trying not to look like all the other AFC's is an AFC thought. You thinking about which frame to choose that will turn her on gives her all the power. You have to start from the feeling of your own self worth.
Ignoring her is what many AFC's do to try to look cool and indifferent, but it doesn't work because you'll never establish a connection.

Making eye contact is not a bad thing, it depends on how you do it. Don't be the first to look away, have the gaze of a confident sexual being. Don't try to hide your own motives as many AFC's do. They are like pavlovian drooling dogs (picture their scared, horny, miserable faces) that don't dare to take a piece of food for fear of getting an electric shock.

But after you have made good eye contact you have to make a move is my guess. Dance with her. If you don't dare to don't try to hit on these types of girls. If you approach after her dance is over the contact will be much much harder I think. The dance is where she opens up and the opportunity lies there.

I agree with most of what said here.

The thing about you is that your entire satisfaction will come when you pick her up and fvck her. Her entire satifaction comes when she dances and gets alot of male attention. Often women who do dance provactively in a club are not doing it to be picked up but as a tool to recieve attention and feed their ego, that is why they are called attention wh0res.

Now trying to pretend to "ignore" her is an AFC. You are obviously attracted to that display so I don't see anything wrong with watching. The thing with picking up chicks in a club is that most of your success will come from non verbal communication. Its hard enough to talk in a club and all you will be doing is short bursts of loud talk. Your strength will come from how you look, dress and overall carry yourself in a club. This is the part where your approach has to be creative. I will give you my example:

a couple of years ago I was in a bar/club. There was a stage with a few girls/guys dancing. There were 3 chicks dancing provactively with one another on the stage while the main floor below, guys were vying for their attention and whistling. I was one of the guys on the stage and as I was moving to the beat, I inch myself closer to them as one of the girls exchanged eye contact with me, I immediatly smiled and said right to her ear: "hey is the club paying you to entertain everyone??!!" she laughed and said "no" at which point I replied "well they should you guys are really putting on a good show". This girl laughed again and then the other girls wanted to know what was so funny so she told them and all of the sudden they turn to me and said "come join us!". I was awestruck at the time because back then I never had the balls to do something like this and because I did, I got rewarded. So as soon as I came (came as in position myself haha) in the middle the 3 girls, they started grinding on my legs (2 on 1 leg and 1 on the other) and it was great!

The point of all this is that when you don't try, you already know the outcome. When you do try there are many possibilities and outcomes that could occur as a result of your approach which is what makes living so much fun.

 

[edger]

I agree with most of what said here.

The thing about you is that your entire satisfaction will come when you pick her up and fvck her. Her entire satifaction comes when she dances and gets alot of male attention. Often women who do dance provactively in a club are not doing it to be picked up but as a tool to recieve attention and feed their ego, that is why they are called attention wh0res.

Now trying to pretend to "ignore" her is an AFC. You are obviously attracted to that display so I don't see anything wrong with watching. The thing with picking up chicks in a club is that most of your success will come from non verbal communication. Its hard enough to talk in a club and all you will be doing is short bursts of loud talk. Your strength will come from how you look, dress and overall carry yourself in a club. This is the part where your approach has to be creative. I will give you my example:

a couple of years ago I was in a bar/club. There was a stage with a few girls/guys dancing. There were 3 chicks dancing provactively with one another on the stage while the main floor below, guys were vying for their attention and whistling. I was one of the guys on the stage and as I was moving to the beat, I inch myself closer to them as one of the girls exchanged eye contact with me, I immediatly smiled and said right to her ear: "hey is the club paying you to entertain everyone??!!" she laughed and said "no" at which point I replied "well they should you guys are really putting on a good show". This girl laughed again and then the other girls wanted to know what was so funny so she told them and all of the sudden they turn to me and said "come join us!". I was awestruck at the time because back then I never had the balls to do something like this and because I did, I got rewarded. So as soon as I came (came as in position myself haha) in the middle the 3 girls, they started grinding on my legs (2 on 1 leg and 1 on the other) and it was great!

The point of all this is that when you don't try, you already know the outcome. When you do try there are many possibilities and outcomes that could occur as a result of your approach which is what makes living so much fun.

I'm not explaining my point well enough, I think. No matter how good your approach is with an attention wh*re who's dancing provacatively, you will always be perceived by her as "the guy she lured in like a fish being lured in by bait." In her mind, her "plan" worked and you were "predictable". You weren't in control, she was. You fell into the "trap". An AFC falls into the trap. This is what I'm trying to explain.

DJDamage, so I guess you never f*cked this chick, otherwise you most likely would've mentioned it in your post, and you too Jophil. You both never mentioned anything about ever bedding these chix, which, no offense(I don't mean it as an insult), leads me to believe the only action you got was a "grind".

 

[ketostix]

I'm not explaining my point well enough, I think. No matter how good your approach is with an attention wh*re who's dancing provacatively, you will always be perceived by her as "the guy she lured in like a fish being lured in by bait." In her mind, her "plan" worked and you were "predictable". You weren't in control, she was. You fell into the "trap". An AFC falls into the trap. This is what I'm trying to explain.

DJDamage, so I guess you never f*cked this chick, otherwise you most likely would've mentioned it in your post, and you too Jophil. You both never mentioned anything about ever bedding these chix, which, no offense, leads me to believe the only action you got was a "grind".

Well the way I see it is you have to make a judgement on when a woman is just trolling for attention and when she's actually in the market for d1ck. I'd say in the example you gave odds are she's trolling for attention and it would be a bad risk to reward ratio to bother at least until she switches he attention trolling mode off. That can happen, a woman can switch between AW mode and buying mode all in the same night.. Timing has a lot to do with it.

 

[DJDamage]

DJDamage, so I guess you never f*cked this chick, otherwise you most likely would've mentioned it in your post, .

You are right I didn't. This happened over 4 years ago, in a time where I didn't have my game going. I made some rookie mistakes but because of that experience and the knowledge I have today, I can go back and explain it and I am also better for it. They were all good looking girls but I was trying to go for the best looking one, while ignoring one of the other girls who gave me strong IOI. I did manage to fvck it up because she wasn't digging me as much (low IOI) and the next song she was griding against another guy while the girl who gave me strong IOI, now ignored me because she didn't want to be felt like leftover. I now realise that I should have isolated the girl with the strong IOI because when you get that strong IOI, you usually can't fvck it up (unless you bore her to death). Again she could have easily been attention wh0re as well but I missed the oppertuinty to explore it farther.

You live and you learn. You take a chance and you dive in, even if you fail the lesson to be learned will make you better with women in the long run (if you recognise the lesson) then quick success.