Women (or men) who hold grudges for 15-20+ years

[bigneil]

Has this happened to anyone: you find someone you knew decades ago and try to reconnect (i.e. Facebook or LinkedIn) only to learn (via their lack of any response whatsoever) that they still haven't gotten over whatever minor disputes you had that many years ago?

I mean seriously, can you imagine still holding a grudge 15 to 20 years later over anything? I didn't run your cat over and light it on fire. Being asked out by someone you didn't like in the 1990's wasn't quite that traumatic for you, was it? And can you at least have a sense of humor about it?

Sure, if you don't want to accept a friend request that's fine, but not having any comment whatsoever to someone who reaches out that many years later? When we were 18 then and we're 40 now??

Do these people ever grow up or mature at all?

 

[ArcBound]

Has this happened to anyone: you find someone you knew decades ago and try to reconnect (i.e. Facebook or LinkedIn) only to learn (via their lack of any response whatsoever) that they still haven't gotten over whatever minor disputes you had that many years ago?

I mean seriously, can you imagine still holding a grudge 15 to 20 years later over anything? You'd have to rape my cat with a flaming baseball bat for me to still be mad that far into the future. Not if someone who liked me asked me out.

Sure if you don't want to accept a friend request that's fine, but not having any comment whatsoever to someone who reaches out many years later? When we were 18 then and 40 now??

Do these people ever grow up or mature at all?

A girl I dated 3 years ago tried to add me but I denied her. Was it cause I was angry or upset? Not really, but because I don't see the point of keeping ex's on facebook to track me.

To be honest Facebook is the most superficial form of "reconnecting". It's mainly just curious people who want to see what happened to someone they knew from the past and once their curiosity is satisfied, just move on having 1 extra friend in what is nothing more than a glorified contact list. If you wanted to reconnect you could have called each other or contacted each other some other way instead of waiting 22 years and then just friending her.

Maybe these women are immature. Or maybe they just don't care enough to add some guy they knew from 22 years ago. I know I could give a flying fvck about the girls I dated 4 years ago, let alone 22...

 

[bigneil]

I rarely ask them to be "friends" (though GD LinkedIn doesn't even allow you to send a damn message without "connecting"), but if someone who I hadn't seen in 15 years wrote to me I wouldn't blow them off altogether. I assume people grow and change over that much time, and I don't rank people based on high school status 20 years later.