Women initiating

[Trump]

Curious what this forum thinks about women initiating calls/texts/dates? Been seeing this women for a while, she works with big tall guys (and girls) but I don’t think she is sleeping with one of the guys she works with. I don’t think she has a boyfriend either. Can’t be 100% sure.

She responds to texts fairly quickly, always counters when she can’t make it, and we have a good time together. Been out on several dates and she also got me a X-Mas gift $130 (pretty sure it was a re-gift, but regardless). I like her but the one issue: she never initiates anything.

If I initiate, she is there in a heartbeat. She once called plans to hang out with her friends the same day in order to go with me to a sporting event and she doesn’t even like sports. If she can’t make a date, she will counter in less than 10 seconds. She always offers to pay for dinner. She talks future dates.

But if I don’t initiate, it’s radio silence. There is very little attempt by her to reach out. If she does, it’s to thank you for the previous get together.

I think I’m the sucker.

Curious to hear thoughts.

 

[backseatjuan]

Nice girl. Femenine yet guy’s girl, wants to be led by a man. Don’t dump her ever.

 

[Crown]

Reduce the percentage of attention you're giving her. Let's say you're at 100%. Reduce it to 80%, then 50%, then 30 and finish at 10%. If you do it well, at the end she will be at 90% and you at 10%

The hardest encounter to this are your emotions and fear of losing

 

[RangerMIke]

Some chicks never will reach out first, unless you've been dating for a couple of months. As long as when you reach out to her, she is good to go and wants to meet you then it's not a problem. In fact, these are chicks I prefer. The only time I'll back off and wait for them to reach out to me is when they start making it hard to meet up... flaky behavior... cancel dates without a reschedule. I will just tell them to let me know when they are free and then forget about her.

I back off and wait for them to come back because I assume she has lost interest or there is another dude she likes better.

 

[Trump]

As long as when you reach out to her, she is good to go and wants to meet you then it's not a problem. In fact, these are chicks I prefer

Really? I don’t prefer girls like this. After so many dates, the girl has to care if I’m dead or alive. I could understand if it was 2-3 dates, but we are several dates in. I know quite a bit about her and she knows I like her.

I haven’t initiated in several days and she hasn’t said anything. I think there is no interest. She is just looking for a friend.

 

[backseatjuan]

Friends don't have sex, did you have sex with her?

Either way man, she is the type of girl any guy should have even as a friend. There is value in a female friend, especially this wonderful. If that's what she wants, don't let the romantic stuff ruin this for you, after all, it doesn't look like you'd be marrying her.

 

[RangerMIke]

Really? I don’t prefer girls like this. After so many dates, the girl has to care if I’m dead or alive. I could understand if it was 2-3 dates, but we are several dates in. I know quite a bit about her and she knows I like her.

I haven’t initiated in several days and she hasn’t said anything. I think there is no interest. She is just looking for a friend.

Well I agree... if you have been seeing her for awhile then she has to put in some effort, if your intent is to have some kind of relationship. It really all depends on what you want. For me, since I'm not really into relationships her behavior would work just fine for me... I certainly don't care if a chick is dating other dudes... and if I'm just one of her 'plates', which she has to juggle that's okay with me as long as I get what I want.

 

[Focal core]

Shes good all around only she doesn't initiates which reflect her own self-worth to not be taken granted by you.. Adore her love her you never regrets.

 

[guru1000]

Some women won’t initiate in the courting stages until they feel comfortable with you.

Remember, it’s a two-sided street: she’s been burned too.

You gauge her IL by her responsiveness and willingness to see you. That’s all that matters. Don’t forget to give her the gift of missing you and create space after giving value.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Some women are just like this. But in my experience, most women will blow up your phone if they really like you, especially after you've slept together and been seeing each-other a few times. Given that all the other signs are extremely positive, especially her cancelling plans to be with you, I would say you just need to understand and accept she is like this, or if you aren't ok with that, then move on.

 

[SoSuave666]

Have you had sex with her?

if you have not you must cut contact and let her reach out. If you are having constant sex every time you hangout or every other time you can try and keep her as a plate. Every single girl I have ever had as a long term plate eventually reaches out and initiates meetups. Usually it happens very quickly, I am good in the seduction stage. It usually is a sign of low interest if they aren't reaching out to you.

 

[Trump]

Good advice, thanks.

I’ll cut out the sarcastic comments,