"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Women have a low self esteem but big ego

Pandora

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My buddy said he was in public the other day and overheard two girls talking. He said they were legit 5/10s. They were saying that they hate themselves but they love the attention of getting hit on. Its like girls these days simultaneously have self esteem issues but still think they are better than you lol. They will turn men down ruthlessly. They have an ego but yet deep down inside they have a poor self image. Most girls i know have serious self esteem issues. Its like a thing with women. So can some one explain how you can have both a big ego and a low self esteem. Da fuq

I know that some girls auto reject you for an ego boost. But its weird how they can do that and still feel like **** inside.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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The Duke

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Big ego's and low self esteem go hand in hand many times. You see it in people who deep down don't feel secure/confident about themselves. The ego protects their fragile self esteem. They use their ego as a "front" or "façade" for whats missing from within. That big ego is a cover up for who they really are. The honestly don't feel as great inside as they show the world. They talk big and put others down to boost themselves up.
 
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mrgoodstuff

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My buddy said he was in public the other day and overheard two girls talking. He said they were legit 5/10s. They were saying that they hate themselves but they love the attention of getting hit on. Its like girls these days simultaneously have self esteem issues but still think they are better than you lol. They will turn men down ruthlessly. They have an ego but yet deep down inside they have a poor self image. Most girls i know have serious self esteem issues. Its like a thing with women. So can some one explain how you can have both a big ego and a low self esteem. Da fuq

I know that some girls auto reject you for an ego boost. But its weird how they can do that and still feel like **** inside.
I KNEW females who went out some nights knowing exactly they were going to reject guys as hashly as possible. That's what them and the girls was doing that night. And I did know at the time it was to inflate their over bloated heads. Now that I have the full picture it's really ugly...
 

GoodOne123

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Perhaps it's true.

But what surprised me is that they openly said that they hate themselves. Have you ever heard someone say "yea I hate myself btw" lol kinda strange to me.
 

l_e_g_e_n_d

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That's because guys like me purposefully look for girls with the biggest egos and crush them--hence, lower esteems. :D
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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logicallefty

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I KNEW females who went out some nights knowing exactly they were going to reject guys as hashly as possible. That's what them and the girls was doing that night. And I did know at the time it was to inflate their over bloated heads. Now that I have the full picture it's really ugly...
Men as a collective have the power to stop this behavior once and for all, collectively. But men, collectively, also don't have the guts to do this. Too many men become spineless shrimp around women and it's never going to change. The good news is, we here on SS are some of the few elite men who actually "get it". But there aren't enough of us to do anything about it other than on a case by case basis. Which is still good for us all to do.
 

Serenity

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@Pandora Their ego compensates for their lack of actual self-esteem. This applies not only to women, but men as well and in situations outside of male and female interaction.

Have a guy like that at work. Massive ego, but little actual self-esteem and confidence. Appears arrogant which differs from confident in that they appear to be above when they actually are not, their talk is that of confident people but their actions are not.

I was once like that myself, a big ego fits perfectly with low self-esteem. I fixed this issue a few years ago. I no longer try to appear for others as much as I try to be for myself. I have a high confidence in myself, but a small ego. I can not learn the actual arts in life if I do not have the humility to.
 

Once Bitten

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In my observations, defensive mechanism and big ego can often be one in the same. Esp. with empowered women in groups (@ work, or at the bar.)
But yes sometimes they aren't.

When they are the same, things can get ugly quickly.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Urbanyst

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Please point out the difference to me, I don't see it.
One is a real and one is an act.

A defense mechanism is always an act. A big ego is real unless you're just pretending to have a big ego as a defense mechanism. But if you really have a big ego then you truly think you're awesome.
 

Serenity

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One is a real and one is an act.

A defense mechanism is always an act. A big ego is real unless you're just pretending to have a big ego as a defense mechanism. But if you really have a big ego then you truly think you're awesome.
So a big ego is a defense mechanism that's so strongly rooted that the one having it are blissfully unaware of it? Still don't see the practical difference, they're obnoxious either way. I don't regard either as real, they're both acts.

Unless you by saying big ego are referring to high self-esteem, but that's different. A big ego gives a sh!t what others think about them, they have low self-esteem because they're easily manipulated by others views rather than standing up for themselves.
 

Urbanyst

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So a big ego is a defense mechanism that's so strongly rooted that the one having it are blissfully unaware of it? Still don't see the practical difference, they're obnoxious either way. I don't regard either as real, they're both acts.

Unless you by saying big ego are referring to high self-esteem, but that's different. A big ego gives a sh!t what others think about them, they have low self-esteem because they're easily manipulated by others views rather than standing up for themselves.
A big ego is not a defense mechanism. Pretending to have a big ego is a defense mechanism.

Really having a big ego is just really having a big ego. Nothing more and nothing less.
 

Serenity

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A big ego is not a defense mechanism. Pretending to have a big ego is a defense mechanism.

Really having a big ego is just really having a big ego. Nothing more and nothing less.
A "big" ego is difficult to define properly. I will agree that ego is not automatically a self defense upon reading more about it. Still it is a common conception that a big ego means overcompensating for a lack of self-esteem. It is hard to distinguish if a persons expressions are genuine or pretended.

I mean that someone appearing to have a big ego might not actually be as important as they claim. Thus it is a defense mechanism to appear better than they really are. Some people really are that good so it does not apply to them, but that's generally the exception and not the rule.
 

Trunks

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My buddy said he was in public the other day and overheard two girls talking. He said they were legit 5/10s. They were saying that they hate themselves but they love the attention of getting hit on. Its like girls these days simultaneously have self esteem issues but still think they are better than you lol. They will turn men down ruthlessly. They have an ego but yet deep down inside they have a poor self image. Most girls i know have serious self esteem issues. Its like a thing with women. So can some one explain how you can have both a big ego and a low self esteem. Da fuq

I know that some girls auto reject you for an ego boost. But its weird how they can do that and still feel like **** inside.
I've said this before in spite of other posters disagreeing with me: the most physically attractive women have also usually been the most socially graceful and playful, and the most insecure and bitter ones have been uggers. The HB 7-8 range (with make up on, subtract two points and that lines up pretty well with OP's assesment lol), I think, is where you find the women that OP talks about: they are attractive enough to get most betas fawning over them, but not nearly enough to be considered hot by anybody aware.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Poonani Maker

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This ALL comes down to the Fact of EASE of society. A mere 100 years ago, women could be RAPED in wars, or harassed walking down the streets. There was imminent danger everywhere they went, especially out of country. They had to be protected. Now, they can walk around as if they are "Equal" to us males. It will take a serious hard times for females to cling to men again. It's that simple. Sure there are afraid women, but they are far and few between nowadays. Just look at Twitch gamer girls how they can get massive amounts of viewers and donations, EVEN THOUGH they are butterfaces. They get all dressed up to stream their awful game play yet guys in droves will watch and donate to their streams "just because," they are female beings. It's pretty sad state of affairs gentlemen. Women can Sh!t on every guy present with their sewer personalities and language, but they will STILL be bombarded with attention and suckup boys. There's no way around it if she's got a piece of the equation in her anatomy such as nice t!ts, but ugly or subpar face, or subpar t!ts but nice face, or nice as5/legs but subpar t!ts or face. All they need is one element to get the suckup guys to serve her dishes 24/7 if she wants.
 

Serenity

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This ALL comes down to the Fact of EASE of society. A mere 100 years ago, women could be RAPED in wars, or harassed walking down the streets. There was imminent danger everywhere they went, especially out of country. They had to be protected. Now, they can walk around as if they are "Equal" to us males. It will take a serious hard times for females to cling to men again. It's that simple. Sure there are afraid women, but they are far and few between nowadays. Just look at Twitch gamer girls how they can get massive amounts of viewers and donations, EVEN THOUGH they are butterfaces. They get all dressed up to stream their awful game play yet guys in droves will watch and donate to their streams "just because," they are female beings. It's pretty sad state of affairs gentlemen. Women can Sh!t on every guy present with their sewer personalities and language, but they will STILL be bombarded with attention and suckup boys. There's no way around it if she's got a piece of the equation in her anatomy such as nice t!ts, but ugly or subpar face, or subpar t!ts but nice face, or nice as5/legs but subpar t!ts or face. All they need is one element to get the suckup guys to serve her dishes 24/7 if she wants.
1. You obviously watch gamer girls on twitch.
2. Male gamers make more or at least equal amounts on twitch, you wouldn't say it's because of their sex.
3. It's fvcking horrible to imagine putting women (or anyone) through hard times to make them respect (actually fear) you.

You talk as if it's was good times when women were harassed openly only so yoy could step in and be the knight saving the day and win her heart. That's fvcked up dude, it really is.
 

Urbanyst

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A "big" ego is difficult to define properly. I will agree that ego is not automatically a self defense upon reading more about it. Still it is a common conception that a big ego means overcompensating for a lack of self-esteem. It is hard to distinguish if a persons expressions are genuine or pretended.

I mean that someone appearing to have a big ego might not actually be as important as they claim. Thus it is a defense mechanism to appear better than they really are. Some people really are that good so it does not apply to them, but that's generally the exception and not the rule.
Like I said already. Pretending to have a big ego is a defense mechanism.

If you really have a big ego then you just have a big ego. It doesn't mean anything.
 

speed dawg

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My buddy said he was in public the other day and overheard two girls talking. He said they were legit 5/10s. They were saying that they hate themselves but they love the attention of getting hit on. Its like girls these days simultaneously have self esteem issues but still think they are better than you lol. They will turn men down ruthlessly. They have an ego but yet deep down inside they have a poor self image. Most girls i know have serious self esteem issues. Its like a thing with women. So can some one explain how you can have both a big ego and a low self esteem. Da fuq

I know that some girls auto reject you for an ego boost. But its weird how they can do that and still feel like **** inside.
Big ego is a symptom of low self esteem. Way I see it, on the scale of self esteem (or confidence), the lower you go, the more symptoms will appear. Symptoms are based on your 'natural' abilities....such as, if the girl is very good looking, she'll likely be very arrogant/BPD/etc. If they aren't, they'll likely act more depressed and such. Goes for men too.
 

Poonani Maker

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1. You obviously watch gamer girls on twitch.
2. Male gamers make more or at least equal amounts on twitch, you wouldn't say it's because of their sex.
3. It's fvcking horrible to imagine putting women (or anyone) through hard times to make them respect (actually fear) you.

You talk as if it's was good times when women were harassed openly only so yoy could step in and be the knight saving the day and win her heart. That's fvcked up dude, it really is.
You assume too much. I state reality.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

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