I been there man. I still go there from time to time. This whole thing can get extremely frustrating to the point where it makes you doubt yourself. I would love to hear advice from people who have actually been through this phase, instead of people who think you "should not" be this or that.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
**** women. **** dating. **** everything.
- Thread starter c0nfus3d1ne
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Ah, Dude, I didn't know you ever said anything bad about me. Where can I find those posts? I wouldn't mind just knowing what has been said.DJVladdy said:Ahh reading posts like these by the OP puts a smile on my face, and make ME feel better about myself automatically... more people should be like you
P.S. Mavrik, I take back everything I wrote about you, you seem like a cool, genuine guy. I must've misunderstood you brotha, I wasn't right.
Anyway, it's cool. I don't hate people on bbs because I don't even know them. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and as long as they're not forcing it on me (and they can't do it over the internet), then it don't take it to heart.
KarmaSutra
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No man understands women. It's futility at it's worst and a complete waste of time. Wringing your hands together anticipating what you think she'll do will only serve to size you up for a straight jacket.c0nfus3d1ne said:
The best you can do is relax and accept yourself for who you can ultimately become. Don't waste energy on anyone else until you're congruent with your best self.
Relax and breathe brother.
TakenDirectly
Don Juan
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Well, that's a perfectly good vent, but I doubt you'll feel that way for long. From what I read you have this one chick who is avoiding you. So why not confront her? Even if it pushes her away from you even more at least you will learn what went wrong and learn from that. Don't EVER EVER EVER TAKE ANYTHING A WOMAN DOES SERIOUSLY. Yes, some women will avoid you, ignore you, forget about you and as soon as you know it they will be calling, texting and stalking you from one hour to the next. Trust me such a thing as "she is avoiding me" isn't a bad thing. Try talking to other women, try being calm, relaxed and confident. Go running, learn guitar, pick a hobby and have fun until you calm yourself down enough to want to try again. Play the same games they do. Trust me she is not the only one that looks or acts the way she does and she sure as hell isn't unique as you might believe she is.
Like Pook's Book said, it's not that you failed at trying to get a women, but you are simply weeding out all the bad ones to find the right one.
Like Pook's Book said, it's not that you failed at trying to get a women, but you are simply weeding out all the bad ones to find the right one.
HalfAddict
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It's cool to throw in the towel once in a while.
Hell man I've thrown in the towel for a bit after Two one night stands within 2 weeks. But I'm not bitter.
Just simmer down a bit, and focus on what you wanna do.
Hell man I've thrown in the towel for a bit after Two one night stands within 2 weeks. But I'm not bitter.
Just simmer down a bit, and focus on what you wanna do.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You have to fight the power. Eventually things will get better. I was depressed from the ages of 19-24 and then suddenly at 25, things started rolling with the family and money and I starting making out with 20 year old hot chicks who had tight tight bodies. Now at 29 I'm driving a bulletproof E class and have more money than ever. It will get better.willtmail said:
One of the things that I found and still find important is having a close group of friends / social network. You have to have people that CARE about you and phone you, keep in contact with you. All the money or girls in the world won't matter if people don't care.
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The question is: Who will cry when you die?
Michele l'Arcangelo
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