"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Women and phone calls

M

mahon83050

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Hey guys,

I was just wondering in your experiences with women, how often do they call you and how early in the relationship. I.e. I have gone out with some girl 2x and we have probably spoke on the phone 3 or 4. BTW, every convo has been very short with me breaking it off everytime. I think I am cutting it too short, because I might come across as having low interest to her. Every time she phoned me, she was just returning MY call. I figured since it is early in the dating scene, she was just being traditional by not calling the guy. This past weekend we played phone tag and I left the last message. She has not returned my phone call yet and I was not planning on calling her. What do you guys think? Not calling me back because girls are not supposed to pick up the phone early on and call the guy of a brush off?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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O

OpenMind

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Use the phone as a tool to set up a date and maybe a quick convo and you will be fine. Nothing wrong with being the one to end the phone call first. If she has high interest you don't have anything to worry about... good luck!
 
P

PuertoRican_Lover

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In the beginning of a relationship a woman may want to talk on the phone more to get to know you, so she may get more comfortable before seeing you. Once this comfort is reached, then I will just call her to set up a personal meeting.
 
O

OpenMind

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Let her get to know you on the date, not the phone. This will build anticipation and if your date(s) go well her interest level will go up as will her anticipation of the next date.... good luck!
 
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