Woman's ego bruised, sorry...MOST online dating women are a hot commodity

[ThisNThat]

This is too funny. There's a woman I known for years, in real life. Pretty successful in her career, age 50, never married, no kids, HIGHLY athletic...avid mtn biker, roller blader, and rock climber.

We're just friends and I wouldn't date her for the reason I'm posting this. A male friend had pointed out that she rather thinks a little too highly of herself. A woman with a major ego.

Anyways, we were trading our stories in online dating and she tells me, "Apparently I'm a hot commodity, I've had quite a few guys I've been talking to on here." She even listed what she has going for her, successful in career, athletic, into the outdoors, like some of these guys were.

Then I said, jokingly, but...as with some jokes there's a little truth, "I guess most women on this site are hot commodities, all you have to be is thin and you'll have a full inbox if you're a woman" or something like that.

She told me that was very insulting and that she indeed has a whole lot more to offer than being thin. I said, "I know that, I've known you for years...don't take it personal...it's just personal experience and from the people I've talked to that most women get a full inbox (aka, a 'hot commodity).

She was cool once I clarified that...but man, what an ego. lol I guess she doesn't realize that a lot of men are dating down and even a 50 year old waitress will do just fine as much as successful career woman.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

I had this impression when I was at college/university that I would only ever date (and probably end up with) university-educated women. Now, further down the line and with more experience of all kinds of people, that doesn't really matter anymore. In fact, you often find the more well-rounded, unique personalities were not university-educated.

Women have probably been more heavily conditioned than men; the psychology of media, marketing and advertising appeals more to their subjective perceptions of reality. They're of the opinion that being 'strong and independent' (i.e. aggressive) is attractive. When, in an evolutionary sense, it's wholly unattractive to men.

 

[ThisNThat]

I had this impression when I was at college/university that I would only ever date (and probably end up with) university-educated women. Now, further down the line and with more experience of all kinds of people, that doesn't really matter anymore. In fact, you often find the more well-rounded, unique personalities were not university-educated.

Women have probably been more heavily conditioned than men; the psychology of media, marketing and advertising appeals more to their subjective perceptions of reality. They're of the opinion that being 'strong and independent' (i.e. aggressive) is attractive. When, in an evolutionary sense, it's wholly unattractive to men.

Yeah, this one is in the STEM field, she does get dates, and she has a great time, but by 2nd or 3rd date, she never hears from them again. I'm kind of guessing they could be turned off by her ego..and she is kind of hyper.

There's another woman I know...she's a computer programmer, had a "boyfriend" for so long, he was hinting around at marriage (Yeah talk about a role reversal, actually a woman being pressured for marriage? Never thought I'd be hearing that these days), she told me she likes dating him, but could never see herself married to him. He eventually called it off.

This latter woman kept claiming men are turned off by her "independence" and I'm like, "Well, your 'independence' just shot yourself in the foot and you lost a guy."

I knew of another career woman, traveled alot and was only home on the weekends for her kid. When she would go out on dates, men always got the vibe she was cold and callous, she lacked the femininity that women used to have. She couldn't figure it out for the life of her, if it was as if, "What's wrong with these guys? OH, they are just intimidated by independent/strong women"

They are great for F-buddies and FWB when they are home on the weekends.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Yeah, this one is in the STEM field, she does get dates, and she has a great time, but by 2nd or 3rd date, she never hears from them again. I'm kind of guessing they could be turned off by her ego..and she is kind of hyper.

There's another woman I know...she's a computer programmer, had a "boyfriend" for so long, he was hinting around at marriage (Yeah talk about a role reversal, actually a woman being pressured for marriage? Never thought I'd be hearing that these days), she told me she likes dating him, but could never see herself married to him. He eventually called it off.

This latter woman kept claiming men are turned off by her "independence" and I'm like, "Well, your 'independence' just shot yourself in the foot and you lost a guy."

I knew of another career woman, traveled alot and was only home on the weekends for her kid. When she would go out on dates, men always got the vibe she was cold and callous, she lacked the femininity that women used to have. She couldn't figure it out for the life of her, if it was as if, "What's wrong with these guys? OH, they are just intimidated by independent/strong women"

They are great for F-buddies and FWB when they are home on the weekends.

It's kind of like they only gone half way to being as 'independent' as men though; like they want all the freedoms, but none of the obligations. This is where you friend falls down.

Freedoms: do what I like, wherever I like, with whom I like, when I like.
Obligations: pay my own way, approach guys, behave rationally, loyalty, reliability, maintain feminine energy.

There are very few (hot) women who accept and embrace the obligations as well as the freedoms. By virtue of being hot, hot women tend to manage to avoid obligation altogether. A man either has to be a complete natural ladies' man, or have flawless game to achieve consistent success in this current environment; I'm not surprised that some get very frustrated.

The real 10/10 is the hot girl who embraces freedom, obligation, who is successful in her own right.

 

[SgtSplacker]

I can tell from the way she handled your comment that she is a royal PIA. She could blow me and make me bust diamonds and I would still next that.

 

[ThisNThat]

I can tell from the way she handled your comment that she is a royal PIA. She could blow me and make me bust diamonds and I would still next that.

Yeah, it's kind of a no brainer as any woman with a pulse is a "hot commodity", when it comes to online dating. lol. Heaven forbid that I bust her bubble and bring her to reality .

 

[SgtSplacker]

Yeah, it's kind of a no brainer as any woman with a pulse is a "hot commodity", when it comes to online dating. lol. Heaven forbid that I bust her bubble and bring her to reality .

Reality is a useless commodity to females, keep the fantasy going pump and dump.

 

[peterm]

I would stay away from her, that altitude in 50s, never married , without kids, obsessed with her look, so easy to insult (mean on your joke) that sounds me like frustrated women who is looking for guys that she can manipulate with.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

Her inflated ego doesn't make her any different than 99.9% of other females.