Womaneese that Ive never heard before--can you help?

[imnexthere]

I asked this girl out around November. Number closed her and had 3 failed phone/in person conversations to set up the date. It was probably low interest level so I dropped it completely and since we are in the same classes entered the friend zone.

Thus ends the background; here is my question.

She has a boyfriend but whenever she refers to him in conversation she does so as "my best friend" or "my friend".

Have you guys ever had this happen? My best guess is that she is trying to spare my feelings because she thinks that I am still interested.

Any thoughts?

 

[b's nuts]

you think to much. who cares.

 

[Mazman]

I agree. The girl has no interest in you. Why care what she calls the guy she's banging.

 

[squirrels]

The other guy is irrelevant. She's rejected you three times.

 

[imnexthere]

Guys, im not going after her. Also, I never got rejected she was just flaky so I figured she was indeed not interested and I forgot about the whole thing. Your replies make me out to be quite the loser.

I just find it odd that she does this and was wondering why. I have no intentions of asking her out. She does have no interest in me. I just always like to attempt to understand why people do the things that they do.

This is not a question regarding whether or not she likes me or whether or not I should ask her out again. The answer to both is no.

 

[rgeere]

Originally posted by imnexthere

She has a boyfriend but whenever she refers to him in conversation she does so as "my best friend" or "my friend".

These guys are right, she isn't interested in you, but that doesn't answer your question on what she is saying in ********.

Women are not direct, and it does not matter if she is using direct or indirect talk.

Basically what I am saying is that a woman always means passive when using direct speech, and active when using indirect speech.

In the phrase above, "my best friend" or "my friend" is active speech. She is using both an adjective and a direct adjectival pronoun to discribe a masculine singluar noun.

In order to understand what she really means in ********, we must find the passive equivalents with the indirect article and prepositional phrases.

Technically
Friend = a male non-aquaintance
My = of mine
Best = better than everyone else

Therefore she is saying -
"a male non-aquaintance of mine who is better than everyone else"

 

[Hollowpoint]

Interesting. Could she be thinking of leaving him or there may be some possible dissatisfaction in her relationship....

Agree with her not being interested in you.....
*Shrugs*

A situation.
My good male friend, told me "his friend" was coming over later.
I said "Your girl?"
He says "yea"


We are not gay, get that out of your mind, and we've known each other for a while. I feel he was just uncomfortable say "my girl" for some reason.

 

[1hepcat]

one word makes a big difference

First off, I'm going to agree with you that if this girl turned you down THREE times, HELLO! She's not interested.

And apparently no one gets this... there's a HUGE difference between "just a friend" and "best friend". Just a friend means there's no way in hell she would ever date you. BUT if she says something like "he's my BEST friend", that means her interest level is as high as it could possibly be! It couldn't get any higher. I have experienced this personally. I have been dating this girl for 6 months and she is madly in love with me. I mean she would do just about anything for me. She has said to me several times, "You are my best friend!"

So NOTE the difference!!!

 

[Crank_It_Up]

Originally posted by imnexthere
...She has a boyfriend but whenever she refers to him in conversation she does so as "my best friend" or "my friend"...

Any thoughts?

girls often refer to their boyfriends as mere friends...

example, you see your girl talking to a guy and ask her about him, she replies, "oh, he's just a friend" (Ever hear Biz Markie's song called "just a friend"?)

then later, she says she needs some space and time to "sort out her feelings"

lots of girls trade up all the time... that is, they keep their relationship going with you until they find something better...

how do they know if the guy they just met will be better than you? They don't, that's why they go out with him a time or two, so they can make that decision.... one of you must go, most of the time it's him that they give the boot to... but then if he ends up being better than you, you will get the "it's just not working out, I need my space, let's just be friends" speech.