Woman poope on dance floor and keeps dancing

[Married Buried]

Club Daum erupted into pandemonium Saturday night after 24 year old Ellen Harris, while under the influence of an explosive ****tail of drugs and alcohol, defecated on the dance floor. "She just squatted on the floor, let loose a giant deuce, and kept dancing as if nothing had happened," says James Deer, the manager and proprietary of the venue. "I was across the room, talking with the bartender when I noticed what happened."

http://www.ravenews.ca/en/read/2013/january/22/

 

[Married Buried]

Here is the rest of the story.

The dance floor was crowded at the time of the incident. Party goers near Harris soon found themselves slipping and sliding through her brown river. "I was walking towards the bar to buy some mojitos for me and my girlfriend when I noticed three people fall down in front of me. When they got up, their arms and shirts were soaked and nasty looking. One of the guys who got up sniffed his arm and within seconds of doing that, he puked all over himself" says Clarence Brown, a 19 year old American who was visiting Montreal for his birthday. "He just kept puking. It was all over the floor, which caused other dancers to slip and fall. I turned tail to return to my girlfriend, but someone behind me grabbed my shoulder for support as they were falling down, which caused me to go down with them. When I hit the ground, I could feel that my pants were wet. I was sitting in vomit. I got up as best as I could without touching the floor, but I still managed to get a bunch on my hand and arms. I'm surprised I didn't puke, because everyone else was."

"Ellen was still dancing like nothing had happened. Everyone around her was on the floor, covered in vomit, yelling and screaming and freaking out, and she was just bopping her head, oblivious to it all, trapped in some sort of drug fuelled alternate reality" says James Deer. "I was in a state of shock. No one can prepare a club owner for a situation like this. It was like a war zone. The vomiting was contagious. Within minutes of that idiot crapping on the dance floor, there must have been twenty or thirty people puking all over themselves and each other in my club. The place stunk of feces, bile, and human failure."

 

[Married Buried]

This completely reminded me of this scene from Family guy.....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4eYSpIz2FjU

Reminded me of that move "Stand By Me". The puking scene:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STB4s7Qhf40

 

[LiveFreeX]

Thank you Malice, will be sharing that with my class today. ROFL

Reminds me of that scene in Problem Child 2 where everyone starts puking on each other during the carnival ride... when that scene plays, I can't stop laughing.

These gotta be fake though.

 

[Married Buried]

Thank you Malice, will be sharing that with my class today. ROFL

Reminds me of that scene in Problem Child 2 where everyone starts puking on each other during the carnival ride... when that scene plays, I can't stop laughing.

These gotta be fake though.

I doubt you'll see this happening in China. I am very surprised this didn't happen in America. Just sh!t on the floor and keep dancing like nothing happened. Sounds like an American name though. Ellen Harris? Somebody find her on facebook for me.

I don't think the article is fake.

 

[switch]

what in the name of **** did i just read? lolol

 

[Atom Smasher]

Sounds like it came straight from the memoirs of Tucker Max.

 

[Upside]

I know dogs that are house trained better than her. She really is quite the b!tch, lol

 

[Atom Smasher]

This is why I don't go to clubs. Now you need to carry around a pooper scooper with you, not to mention a roll or two of Bounty, "the quicker picker-upper".

Seriously though, it seems that an incident like that can literally tank the man's business.

 

[Married Buried]

That site is full of crazy news. Check this one out:

Quote:
DUBSTEP PROMOTER KILLS SON FOR HAVING SMALL PENIS
FEATURED ARTICLE

Notorious Dubstep promoter Duval Lacrosse was arrested over the weekend after he murdered his 9 year old son Marcel. The promoter was worried that his son's small penis would jeopardize his ability to live a rich and fulfilling life as an adult, and decided to spare him the torture of inadequacy by drowning him in a bathtub.

The promoter told the police that his son had been born with a micro-penis, and that every year, it seemed to shrink a bit. "He was very upset with his son's equipment," SPVM spokesman Jean Legrand told Ravenews. "It weighed heavily on his mind." Friends of Duval agreed that his son's penile problems concerned him a great deal. "I'd be playing at his parties, and he'd just keep tapping me on my shoulder telling me about how small his son's **** was," says Regis Kirkland. "It was really weird. No one deserves to die because of something like. Duval's an idiot."

Duval's obsession with penis size was well known to Montreal's rave scene. "He'd sell penis pumps, **** and ball stretching devices, and weird herbal penis enlargement pills at all his parties," said Nathan Duvillion. "The last party he organized was called Big Rods. Duval was obsessed with ****s, and he thought having a man's self-worth was measured by the size of his ****. I never would have thought he'd kill his son for having a small penis though. It just goes to show you, you can party with a guy for years, but that doesn't mean you know what kind of person he is. That dude you spent all that time dancing with might one day drown his son in a bathtub for having a micro-penis."

Duval's ex-wife, Natasha Desmoines, was inconsolable. "Marcel had his whole life ahead of him," said Natasha. "I don't know what I'm going to do. My life is empty without him."

 

[plate's_empty]

This just goes to show, one ill timed dump, and you can put a man out of business.

 

[SamTheHobit]

I honestly havent laughed so hared in a few weeks xD

 

[Married Buried]

This one is good too

The so-called phantom snuggler continues to elude Montreal Police officers, who have released yet another statement warning college students to be on the look-out for suspicious men prowling around their buildings late at night. "Over the weekend, we received another report from a woman who claims to have woken up in the embrace of a complete stranger," says Sgt. Lemieux. After yelling at the man, he promptly got out of her bed and jumped out her open window, which he had apparently jimmied open to enter her apartment."

Lisa Huxley was one of the phantom snugglers first victims. "I just woke up to discover some weird hairy guy was spooning me," says Lisa. "It was terrifying. It's scary to think that someone can slip into your bed without even waking you up. I asked him 'Who the hell are you?' and he just told me, very calmly, that he was a dubstep DJ, as if that explained everything. Then he climbed out my window, and ran away. There are some seriously messed up people out there."

Deans at several of Montreal's Universities have urged their students to install locks on their windows. Henry Bellwether, dean of the University of St-Denis, says it's better to be safe than sorry. "The phantom snuggler is still out there, terrorizing our students," says Mr. Bellwether. "There's no telling when he'll strike next. That's why it's important for our students, and for all Montrealers really, to ensure the safety of their persons. We are hopeful that the SPVM will capture this errant snuggler before he terrorizes anyone else."

Bernard Beautemps is one such victim who looks forward to seeing the snuggler face justice. "Last month, I woke up to some guy pulling on my bed sheets. My first reaction was to punch him, but I missed his jaw by two inches. He looked at me and said he just wanted to snuggle before running off into my bathroom. I was in a state of shock, and kind of freaked out, so I didn't chase after him. My bathroom doesn't have windows, so I thought he was trapped in there, and I don't know if he's got a knife or a gun, or what, so I called the police and waited for them to arrive. They went to investigate, and discovered that he had escaped through the ceiling tiles. This crazy bastard snuck into my apartment through the ceiling. He's insane."

Police are confident that, with the amount of witnesses who have seen the phantom snuggler, he'll eventually be caught. "We don't have many leads at the moment," says Sgt. Lemieux, "But we are confident that we will apprehend the snuggler in the near future. In the mean time, we ask that people be vigilant."

 

[Married Buried]

These things happen. Look at this kid who was killed by his mother for having a small penis:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/28/mother-kills-son-small-penis-indonesia_n_2779668.html