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Woman Griping about my Boots
- Thread starter logicallefty
- Start date
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
Women REALLY care about how she is percieved in her social circle. You are going to a party with her friends. How you look is a direct reflection on her.
POLICE BOOTS... Okay I'm going to agree with your gal. This shows no style. I have Army boots from my days of service, I would NEVER wear them to a party with with friends of my woman.
The best way to handle this is to tease her a bit, then tell her to trust you. Don't say you are not going to wear them, just don't. Let her wonder if you are.
No one is saying you need to go out and buy shoes for ever occasion, but ever man should at least have a nice pair of brown and black shoes. Spend some money on them and get a really nice pair in both colors (I like Johnson-Murphy) worth about $200 a piece. If you can afford them then spend the money... women notice this stuff and it will serve you well. In addition, a nice pair of high quality shoes will last you awhile, and it's my experience that in the long run you end up saving money since a great pair of high quality shoes with some minor repair like re-soling will last you 20 years, in that time you might spend 4 times that on lower quality brands that don;t last that long.
Same it true for suits. I spend A LOT of money on suits, and get them tailored to my body. But the suits I buy are high quality, last longer, and always look good.
This is all about showing up as the best you can possibly look. You should want to do this without your woman cajoling you to do so. But hey... if you are the guy that shows up in police boots and you don't want to change, then don't.
POLICE BOOTS... Okay I'm going to agree with your gal. This shows no style. I have Army boots from my days of service, I would NEVER wear them to a party with with friends of my woman.
The best way to handle this is to tease her a bit, then tell her to trust you. Don't say you are not going to wear them, just don't. Let her wonder if you are.
No one is saying you need to go out and buy shoes for ever occasion, but ever man should at least have a nice pair of brown and black shoes. Spend some money on them and get a really nice pair in both colors (I like Johnson-Murphy) worth about $200 a piece. If you can afford them then spend the money... women notice this stuff and it will serve you well. In addition, a nice pair of high quality shoes will last you awhile, and it's my experience that in the long run you end up saving money since a great pair of high quality shoes with some minor repair like re-soling will last you 20 years, in that time you might spend 4 times that on lower quality brands that don;t last that long.
Same it true for suits. I spend A LOT of money on suits, and get them tailored to my body. But the suits I buy are high quality, last longer, and always look good.
This is all about showing up as the best you can possibly look. You should want to do this without your woman cajoling you to do so. But hey... if you are the guy that shows up in police boots and you don't want to change, then don't.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
Hate on me if you like but showing up to an event dressed inappropriately shows no class. It goes both ways... you don't show up at a bowling ally in a tux. Class has nothing to do with putting on airs and pretending you a something that you are not. It's the demonstrable ability to adjust to any social situation.
If your dead set on wearing you police boots just tell you girl you don't want to go. Why go out of your way to be an @ss to her. Show some class and go with the dress code. Being DJ isn't about doing whatever the fvck you want... it's about doing the right thing... for yourself. Grow up and get some big boy shoes. Because it's the right thing to do.
If your dead set on wearing you police boots just tell you girl you don't want to go. Why go out of your way to be an @ss to her. Show some class and go with the dress code. Being DJ isn't about doing whatever the fvck you want... it's about doing the right thing... for yourself. Grow up and get some big boy shoes. Because it's the right thing to do.
VladPatton
Master Don Juan
Sometimes you just have to really take an honest look at yourself when you're being critiqued. I'm not saying you should spend thousands on every gay-looking outfit that is available for men nowadays (and there are many!), but a suit, or a dress shirt, no tie, and nice shoes is just a classy way of presenting yourself. That's all that is happening here...you're just presenting yourself to her friends. I don't always feel like waxing the car, but you can drive around with only so much bird sh!t on it until you gotta wash the fvcker. Oh yeah, and wax it.
Yeah it sucks, it's stuffy, you don't wanna be there, and it feels like you're cheating on your police shoes, but it'll be over soon enough, and you earn mad points with the girl. Kick the shoes off when you get home, down a beer, and bang her like a beast for redemption lol.
Yeah it sucks, it's stuffy, you don't wanna be there, and it feels like you're cheating on your police shoes, but it'll be over soon enough, and you earn mad points with the girl. Kick the shoes off when you get home, down a beer, and bang her like a beast for redemption lol.
logicallefty
Moderator
I appreciate all of the replies, every single one.
Fashon has never been my strength. I have worn the same style of cloths sense HS which is jeans, a t-shirt, and a dress shirt over the t-shirt untucked and unbuttoned. I switched from Nikes to the police boots in about 05-06 and haven't put much else on my feet unless it was like dress shoes for court or a job interview or something like that.
In any case, everything worked out not going to the party. She had a headache anyway but not enough to stop her from coming over to my house. Plus the roads were bad in our area last night so it worked out fine.
This has been a thought provoking issue for me. Never had anyone complain about my boots. The whole question of "Do I change my style for a woman?" is a very interesting one. I think in my situation the boots would have been fine, but had this been a more formal party then for sure not. But when someone tells me "casual" then that means I put on the same stuff i wear to my favorite corner hick bar, and my boots are quite welcome there. I think culture may play into this a lot too. I get the perception that many of you guys live and party in big cities. I am a country redneck that lives in the dead center of Illinois and we don't give to much thought to the attire of others at the social places and events that I go to. The woman who questioned my boots is a city girl from a pretty big town about 40 min away.
Fashon has never been my strength. I have worn the same style of cloths sense HS which is jeans, a t-shirt, and a dress shirt over the t-shirt untucked and unbuttoned. I switched from Nikes to the police boots in about 05-06 and haven't put much else on my feet unless it was like dress shoes for court or a job interview or something like that.
In any case, everything worked out not going to the party. She had a headache anyway but not enough to stop her from coming over to my house. Plus the roads were bad in our area last night so it worked out fine.
This has been a thought provoking issue for me. Never had anyone complain about my boots. The whole question of "Do I change my style for a woman?" is a very interesting one. I think in my situation the boots would have been fine, but had this been a more formal party then for sure not. But when someone tells me "casual" then that means I put on the same stuff i wear to my favorite corner hick bar, and my boots are quite welcome there. I think culture may play into this a lot too. I get the perception that many of you guys live and party in big cities. I am a country redneck that lives in the dead center of Illinois and we don't give to much thought to the attire of others at the social places and events that I go to. The woman who questioned my boots is a city girl from a pretty big town about 40 min away.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
Don't change your style for a woman. Look for a woman that appreciates your style.logicallefty said:
It's not about changing for her, it's about showing up the best you can be and dressing for the occassion. I dated a woman who graduated from Texas A&M and while we were dating she took me to meet her old college friends at thier homecoming. They were having a party in a barn, and the dress was 'western'. I went out and got a cowboy hat, boots, and bootcut jeans. I looked at myself in the mirror and thought i looked like an idiot. But that is how everyone was dressed. Then I took the time to learn the "Cotton Eyed Joe" and the "Texas Two Step".
Everyone thought this city boy was going to be a fish out of water. I surprised the fvck out of everyone. Part of being the best you can be is to step outside your comfort zone, expanding your reach... meet new people. Now I can go into country bars and fit right in if I need to.
zekko
Master Don Juan
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Don't think of it as changing your style for a woman. Think of it as learning something about fashion, about how to dress appropriately, which as you state yourself is a weak point. It's just the same as learning or improving about anything else. It just so happens that in this case maybe a woman brought it to your attention.
Mr_Maximus
Don Juan
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you are not changing your style for a women. you are dressing appropriately for the occasion and upgrading your style. I would wear those tactical boots that you posted for a game of paintball, or to go hiking.
For a casual social event, for me, is a pair of Armani jeans, a slim fitted tailored shirt ( tucked in with top two buttons undone, sleeves rolled up), matching color belt, watch strap (unless stainless steel) and shoes.
A pair of shoes like these :
http://www.dhgate.com/product/snake-grain-cowhide-leather-black-mens-dress/194867403.html/?utm_source=pla&utm_medium=GMC&utm_campaign=hyakaou&utm_term=194867403&f=bm|194867403|110004-DressShoes|GMC|Adwords|pla|hyakaou|US|110004-DressShoes|c||0HRF|&gclid=CL7Q4cGY_cICFc3LtAodRmsAxw
If you turn up in those and smelling good, you will come across stylish and irresistible. It will make her look good too, just showing up with you. she will love you !
Women like shoes, its the most important item of your attire. Women check them out. get the best quality and most stylish pair you can afford. You dont have to wear designer branded cloths but just make sure the quality is good and fit you really well. Also, be color coordinated..
Women really appreciate a fashionable man who pays attention to details.
Be so suave, be slick....
For a casual social event, for me, is a pair of Armani jeans, a slim fitted tailored shirt ( tucked in with top two buttons undone, sleeves rolled up), matching color belt, watch strap (unless stainless steel) and shoes.
A pair of shoes like these :
http://www.dhgate.com/product/snake-grain-cowhide-leather-black-mens-dress/194867403.html/?utm_source=pla&utm_medium=GMC&utm_campaign=hyakaou&utm_term=194867403&f=bm|194867403|110004-DressShoes|GMC|Adwords|pla|hyakaou|US|110004-DressShoes|c||0HRF|&gclid=CL7Q4cGY_cICFc3LtAodRmsAxw
If you turn up in those and smelling good, you will come across stylish and irresistible. It will make her look good too, just showing up with you. she will love you !
Women like shoes, its the most important item of your attire. Women check them out. get the best quality and most stylish pair you can afford. You dont have to wear designer branded cloths but just make sure the quality is good and fit you really well. Also, be color coordinated..
Women really appreciate a fashionable man who pays attention to details.
Be so suave, be slick....
Last edited:
Sik
Don Juan
LogicalLefty,
Your woman is right. Your boots are not appropriate for a work-related party, unless it's a BBQ for oil rig workers and cops.
I don't listen to the advice of women, unless it is fashion-related. They live, breathe and follow it as if it was religion, so they generally know what they're talking about.
I like tactical boots; I wear them to the range and the mountains. For more general usage, I wear a style like these. I find them to have that rugged look with an outdoor style, yet work great with nice jeans, a pattern button up (top two buttons undone) shirt with the sleeves rolled and a nice brown belt.
http://shop.timberland.com/product/index.jsp?productId=26698826
Now you'll fit into the rural areas and the suburban areas without losing manly credibility.
Your woman is right. Your boots are not appropriate for a work-related party, unless it's a BBQ for oil rig workers and cops.
I don't listen to the advice of women, unless it is fashion-related. They live, breathe and follow it as if it was religion, so they generally know what they're talking about.
I like tactical boots; I wear them to the range and the mountains. For more general usage, I wear a style like these. I find them to have that rugged look with an outdoor style, yet work great with nice jeans, a pattern button up (top two buttons undone) shirt with the sleeves rolled and a nice brown belt.
http://shop.timberland.com/product/index.jsp?productId=26698826
Now you'll fit into the rural areas and the suburban areas without losing manly credibility.
Bokanovsky
Master Don Juan
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Most women don't know sh!t about male fashion. They can spot a fashionably dressed man but don't rely on them to help you pick out clothes.Sik said:
In response to the OP, I kind of see where she's coming from. Logicallefty, imagine that you invited her to your work Christmas party and she showed up dressed like a wh0re, wearing a see-through dress, fishnets, showing too much cleavage, etc. You'd be embarrassed, right? That basically how she would feel if you showed up to a formal party in your 511 boots. Every man should have a pair of decent dress shoes.
Vulpine
Master Don Juan
Lefty, I finally wore out my first pair of combat boots this hunting season. That's what I get for not polishing them at least yearly: they only lasted through 21 years of use/abuse.
If I had my way, I'd run around in black Red Kap coveralls bloused into highly polished combat boots. I mean, pragmatically, it's the pinnacle of clothing technology (short of running around in camouflage coveralls).
I've been criticized for them, too, just as you are in your situation. Except, in my situation, I way overdressed for the party
...then bloused my pinstriped dress pants into my highly (I do mean extreme shined) boots and hit the scene.
But, I rock whatever clothes I wear, and I love my boots far too much to apologize to anyone. I'm a clown, though, and peacock like mad. I understand completely the affection for quality leather footwear, however. It forms to your feet and you forget they're on. I shudder to think how many miles my last pair travelled.
I'd say take the time and fix them up with polish. Yeah, it's a pain to smooth out the rough spots with polish, but, it's sure cheaper than a pair of Chinese shoes that you'll be lucky if they last you through the party. Plus, polishing them would help the ones you have last longer.
Polish them up and make sure your pants hang a little long: you're chick won't even know they're the same boots.
It'll likely wreck your evening if you show her before the end of the evening, trust me. Be careful to show her they are the very same boots at the end of the night to yank her chain.
If I had my way, I'd run around in black Red Kap coveralls bloused into highly polished combat boots. I mean, pragmatically, it's the pinnacle of clothing technology (short of running around in camouflage coveralls).
I've been criticized for them, too, just as you are in your situation. Except, in my situation, I way overdressed for the party
...then bloused my pinstriped dress pants into my highly (I do mean extreme shined) boots and hit the scene.
But, I rock whatever clothes I wear, and I love my boots far too much to apologize to anyone. I'm a clown, though, and peacock like mad. I understand completely the affection for quality leather footwear, however. It forms to your feet and you forget they're on. I shudder to think how many miles my last pair travelled.
I'd say take the time and fix them up with polish. Yeah, it's a pain to smooth out the rough spots with polish, but, it's sure cheaper than a pair of Chinese shoes that you'll be lucky if they last you through the party. Plus, polishing them would help the ones you have last longer.
Polish them up and make sure your pants hang a little long: you're chick won't even know they're the same boots.
It'll likely wreck your evening if you show her before the end of the evening, trust me. Be careful to show her they are the very same boots at the end of the night to yank her chain.
Poonani Maker
Master Don Juan
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It's good that Lefty didn't yield to the hoe...but now that she's not overreacting (like a good 80% of American women WOULD have about the black boots), I'm talkin, overreaction in the sense of, THIS will break our relationship. A LOT of women would break a fvcking relationship over Boots. It's sad, we know...
But THIS particular one didn't, so She passed Your test. Now, you can feel free to Give to her for 1st Giving to you and yielding the right-a-way to you. Give to her, now, by buying some good going out to non-redneck-bar boots./shoes.
But THIS particular one didn't, so She passed Your test. Now, you can feel free to Give to her for 1st Giving to you and yielding the right-a-way to you. Give to her, now, by buying some good going out to non-redneck-bar boots./shoes.
guru1000
Master Don Juan
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Here you go: http://www.zappos.com/alexander-mcqueen-metal-cap-toe-oxford-black
Want to spend less? Go with these: http://www.zappos.com/cesare-paciotti-46474-black
Once you wear either, and the puzzy gates openeth, thank Guru.
Want to spend less? Go with these: http://www.zappos.com/cesare-paciotti-46474-black
Once you wear either, and the puzzy gates openeth, thank Guru.
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
I've owned real estate that cost me less than those shoes.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
If wearing boots is your thing... Cole Haan has some great dress boots only sale.guru1000 said:
http://www.colehaan.com/mens-sale-1
You can still honor your style and dress nice. I have a pair of Cole Haan deck shoes that I've been wearing for.... now get this 26 years, and they still look great. They are good quality shoes and they last.
Vulpine
Master Don Juan
Are those the same fashion geniuses that wear pants (not dresses), shoes without heels, have a job, can't cook, and swear like a sailor?mrRuckus said:
I know a whole bunch of dudes like that.
logicallefty
Moderator
I have read through all of you guys' replies multiple times. What I have taken from here is that while this seems like a sh|t test and IS likely one IN PART, there is also an element of it that is real: that the woman has a point and I should consider buying some better boots because I am clueless about such matters. But not on her terms, on mine. And oh I am so clueless when it comes to "IN" fashion or what "THEY" are wearing now. My whole life I have adopted what has really become "Lefty's style" and the people who know me accept it, and if they do have issue with it, they don't tell me. So this woman doing that really threw me off. I wouldn't have been AS thrown off if it had been one of my male friends, or even my mother. I'm going to look at the boot brands you guys suggested and find some that are better suitable for public, and different than my police boots, but not so different that they "are not me". I do like "Lefty's Style" and will never completely change that for some \|/ or anyone... But I do feel now, after hearing you guys replies which I know are objective and honest, that some new boots should be in order ...
Thank you again, fellas.. Much appreciated.
Thank you again, fellas.. Much appreciated.